tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2286787692731448522024-02-20T23:14:18.930-08:00Because We Watch Too Much TVThe entertainment blog that started because of two out-of-control television addictions. We might as well do something with it.Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.comBlogger1373125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-4823367646598936582016-08-14T09:15:00.001-07:002016-08-14T09:15:17.044-07:00It's been a long time, so who knows whether anyone ever checks this or not, but we've moved to <a href="http://becausewewatchtoomuchtv.com/">becausewewatchtoomuchtv.com</a>!Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05621784714002726363noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-49771296988733841432013-11-04T17:17:00.002-08:002013-11-04T17:17:44.789-08:00Five Endings to Dexter that Would Have Been Better than the One We Got<div class="post_title" style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 22px; line-height: 1.3; margin-bottom: 10px; outline: none 0px;">
<span style="font-size: 13.63636302947998px; line-height: 17.27272605895996px;">Dexter was one of our favorite shows. We even loved the Lumen season. It was season six that dropped the ball, but season seven caught it again. Then season eight took a knife and POPPED the ball. The final episodes were so bad that we can’t in good conscience recommend the show anymore. It taints the entire thing. </span></div>
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The only way we can make people watch it is to turn off the show before the last season and say, “I don’t have those DVDs, but here’s how it ends” and make something up. Here are our options. Sound off with your own if you have other thoughts:</div>
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<li style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); box-sizing: border-box; outline: none 0px;">Dexter and Deb are busy hating each other. Dexter leaves the country, but Deb gets a hold of Harrison so Dexter can’t take him. The second half of the season: a time jump. Harrison is ten and is showing signs of a Dark Passenger. Dexter comes back into the country at Deb’s request to help Harrison the way his father helped him. After a little bit of that, Dexter is arrested. Death penalty.</li>
<li style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); box-sizing: border-box; outline: none 0px;">The same ending, only Dexter dies and doesn’t become a lumberjack</li>
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BUT, we hear that Showtime wouldn’t let the writers kill Dexter (we guess they had no problem with Deb, arguably the heart of the show, dying…weird), although he absolutely needed to die. Still, there were options</div>
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<li style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); box-sizing: border-box; outline: none 0px;">The way the show was going at the perfectly tolerable beginning of the final season, Deb hated Dexter and even tried to kill him. The show should have gone all the way with that. Rather than salvage the relationship, a season-long arc of Deb hunting Dexter, ending in a bloody climax that killed one or both of them, would have been much more exciting. It might even have been more true to the characters. </li>
<li style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); box-sizing: border-box; outline: none 0px;">Dexter abandons the code completely, goes off the rails, and starts killing whoever he wants. In season seven, he abandoned the code for a kill. Hannah had a lot to do with that. One problem with most of Dexter’s run is that Dexter has a conscience and feels bad for things like Rita’s death and Deb’s trauma. Sociopaths. Don’t. Feel. Bad. It was all psychologically unbelievable. It would have been more fitting to have Dexter just become a real serial killer. Then someone like Batista could have shot him. Instead, the show wimped out by making him a normal family man vigilante who was capable of some very normal love. That would have been fine…but that’s not the idea of the show. Stick with your idea. </li>
<li style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(0, 0, 0, 0); box-sizing: border-box; outline: none 0px;">Dexter and Deb are busy hating each other, but they have to team up to protect themselves and Harrison when Hannah returns. Hannah kills Deb; Dexter kills Hannah. Dexter gets blamed and has to run with Harrison. He gets out of the country. In his new country, Dexter starts hunting again. </li>
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As things stand, we got a boring season, a cop-out on what the show was setting up with Deb, and the worst possible ending to the series in the finale. Actually, the show could have done worse. It could have had Deb and Dexter have sex before she died. The show flirted with that, but decided that would be really stupid. Then, it decided to do the second most stupid idea.</div>
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Season eight half one grade: B</div>
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Season eight half two and finale grade: F</div>
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Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-74421705211644806062013-11-03T09:16:00.000-08:002013-11-03T09:16:04.874-08:00The Vampire Diaries- The ways to make it good again (and whether this new season is taking advantage of said ways)<div class="p1">
The Vampire Diaries used to be one of the most shockingly good guilty pleasures ever to suck us in and force us to start defending it. Then the last season amped up all its worst elements, ditched every aspect we liked and bored us to death. The three biggest culprits? 1) The cure and the search for it. 2) The Sire Bond and 3) The Originals. Why? Because the cure was less of a mystery and more of a search for something, and this is a show that thrives on mystery. Plus, we were sitting there thinking that Elena was going to be cured and the twist of the last season finale would be moot. Fortunately, the show saved itself by humaning Katherine instead. </div>
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The sire bond sucked because no one wanted Elena to get with Damon because of a supernatural compulsion. We wanted her to choose him, to fall, to finally be fed up with Stefan, and for Damon to actually deserve her in that moment. Instead, we got a cop out. Perfect Elena couldn't choose Damon…she had to be forced too. Plus, it was all a little rape-y. Chicks don't dig rape-y (we're chicks). The show pulled it together by breaking the bond and having Elena still choose Damon in the end. But it could have been so much more delicious. See: The Killing Dance by Laurel K Hamilton (you have to start with Guilty Pleasures in that series and stop after Obsidian Butterfly, but when you see this situation handled with no sire bond, you'll see how great Delena could have been…and weep). </div>
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The Originals were not only whiney and boring, they did nothing but mull around and threaten to do bad things. Two seasons with them were seasons of inaction, for the most part. They were too busy backstabbing each other, drinking, and teasing people to really get down to evil plans. Th sonly reason we are tuning in this year is because they are gone. Will we watch their new show? Never.</div>
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Since they are gone, we will give TVD another chance. How is it going after five episodes? Have the writers fixed the problems? Let's see.</div>
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<li class="li1">The Fix: No more fake deaths. Has it been fixed?: No, the show hasn't fixed this. Think to yourself: who on this show hasn't fake died only to not really be dead or to be resurrected? Almost fucking no one. And it takes the stakes away. Now, every time someone dies, we can't mourn in the moment or be shocked because we are too busy knowing that they will probably back. We sit there wondering how rather than crying. We knew Bonnie was coming back this entire time, and now we know how. Silas can trade his life for hers. Ho hum, snore. Her funeral scene was actually really touching. But it's ruined now. Still, we're pretty glad Katherine is still alive. To fix this annoying problem, the show needs to have some character (like a witch) tamper with the veil so that no one can ever come back from the dead unless they are being turned into a vampire. No more resurrections; no more ghosts. Then when a character gets their neck cracked, viewers will sit up and take notice. </li>
<li class="li1">The Fix: More human characters. Everyone on the show is supernatural, but we need moments of every day bravery and friendship. We need humans to be shocked at what is going on and for the good supernatural characters to protect. Matt is not enough. Has it been fixed?: Yeah! Well, it's starting to get fixed. We have the creepy college professor, who we love. Katherine took the cure and was seen fighting a sinus infection (ha!). And Elena is making friends with a student whose life is as depressing as hers. Aaron. Jesse was a good one, until he got turned. At least he's still hot as hell. College is full of potential human love interests, victims, and friends. By widening the potential character pool, the show is promising us new life.</li>
<li class="li1">The Fix: Proactive heroes. Has it been fixed? Not really. Elena seems to care only about her own circle of friends and loved ones. We want characters who go hunting for evil and who actively protect their town. Where is the vampire neighborhood watch? Jeremy is a vampire hunter who never seems to go on an actual vampire hunt. Caroline and Elena are more focused on having a fun, typical college experience than putting their super powers to good use. Instead of waiting for baddies to go after them, we'd like to see the characters start hunting some baddies, vigilante style. Elena has the physical strength to be a bad ass FINALLY, and yet she was more bad ass when she was a human? Questionable, show. Questionable. </li>
<li class="li1">The Fix: Break up Delena. Has it been fixed? No, but at least an episode had Elena remembering how great Stefan was before he started ripping heads off. Amnesia is usually lame, but Stefan's memory loss gave Elena a reason to go over the way they met and remember what she gave up. Stelena was one of the most healthy, supportive, equal relationships in TV history, and we don't think Damon earned Elena yet. He's not far enough away from the serial killer he used to be. Elena should ditch both guys (after Damon does something awful and makes a huge mistake) and date someone who has never serial killed anyone for a while. A real contender too, not just a red herring. We'd like to wonder, "Hey, could she actually end up with someone who isn't one of the Salvatore brothers?" Not Aaron…he's not hot enough. Someone human. A college senior. Then have both Salvatore brothers in agony trying to win her back. That's the tension we need.</li>
<li class="li1">The Fix: Better baddies. Has it been fixed? Sigh. A little. We don't like doppelgänger baddies. Just hire a new actor! The doppelgänger crap barely worked with Terry O'Quinn on LOST, and that was TERRY O'QUINN. Sorry, but no one on The Vampire Diaries is strong enough of an actor that they can't compete with Terry on the plane of "let's create another character for them, because we love having them around" except for Nina Dobrev. Nina is by far the best performer on the show. Also, the show is still giving the bad guy the same personality as Klaus. A slow-moving, threatening whiner. Silas is Klaus 2.0, but we don't even have the fun Klaroline subplot. Silas needs to go. The "little bit" that has been fixed, villain-wise is a) Qetsiyah and b) the college prof. We like them and think that they can take the show places whiner baddies can't. </li>
<li class="li1">The Fix: Institute some kind of panel of authority. Has it been fixed? No, but having a secret society of (we think) college professors guarding the school from vamps is a start. Just read the Harry Dresden books to find out that the White Counsel of wizards is probably the most fun aspect of the series to read about. There is something about the heroes rebelling against authority and having the authority misjudge them that hits a good note with the audience. This show just has random transients with powers running around and getting into conflict. A government can provide more tension. </li>
<li class="li1">The Fix: Widen the supernatural pool and don't introduce the most powerful of their kind for a long time. Also, move some of the focus out of Mystic Falls. Has it been fixed? Well, we have the travelers. Not a new concept in this genre, but we will take it. We can't be scared of vampire enemies ever again, because the Originals were the most powerful of their kind. They were brought in too soon. But there are several mythological creatures to choose from. We wouldn't even mind the show dipping into religious mythology. Supernatural had its best seasons once it brought on the angels. The Vampire Diaries could do a darker, sexier spin on that idea. (Wait. Never mind. Nothing is sexier than Castiel.) As far as the new locale, college doesn't seem like a forced new territory AND it's really working. The show has fully tapped the mysteries of the small town. It's time to move on. These characters are hundreds of years old, for the most part, and shouldn't be holed up in one area.</li>
<li class="li1">The Fix: Get another mystery going and then bring on the twists that made the first few seasons so fun. Has it been fixed?- YES, and the pacing is awesome. We have Katherine's daughter, the reveal of Qetsiyah, and the question of what in the darn hell that teacher is up to. Unanswered questions keep us coming back for more (see: LOST), and this show is churning out the head scratchers again. Last season, the questions were a) when is Klaus finally going to make a real move and b) who is going to get the cure/where is the cure. And that's IT. Not enough. Now, we even have Elena's parents as part of the mystery. That worked for Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, so it should work here too. </li>
<li class="li1">The Fix: More mature characters. Has it been fixed? No, and it's grating on our last nerve. These characters are teenagers with powers even when they are old as dirt. The writers need to sit down and watch Blast from the Past. The characters need to show their age instead of hold petty grudges and lack any amount of wisdom. Elena Gilbert and Caroline Forbes are 18 years old and have more maturity then any older character on this show. The Originals were so stupid! We needed some reminder of the age gaps. Sheeeee-it, they aren't even trying. Silas wakes up after 2,000 years. The last thing he remembers is ancient fucking Greece. AND HE SPEAKS AND ACTS LIKE HE'S BEEN IN OUR CULTURE FOREVER! Now, we know what you're thinking: He can read people's minds. He's been getting his behavior and speech from everyone else, and they are modern. Still. No.</li>
<li class="li1">The Fix: More bromances/emphasis on non-sexual relationships. Has it been fixed? Yes. While nothing can replace Damon and Alaric, seeing Stefan calling Caroline his best friend is awesome. Elena might find a bro of her own in Aaron. Das goooooood.</li>
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Overall, the show has made significant steps in the right direction and the first five episodes of this season are enough to renew our faith that last season was a sad fluke. There are still some repeated mistakes, but it's so rare that a show goes uphill after a stumble that we are ready to forgive it. Keep it up, show. We're still fans. Just never ever ever bring the originals back, even when their show fails.</div>
Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-255494687742221442013-11-02T17:19:00.003-07:002013-11-02T17:19:55.113-07:00Breaking Bad- The final eight episodes *spoilers*<div class="p1">
We weren't blogging during Breaking Bad's final run, which is a complete and inexcusable failure on our parts. Leeard had been working for a year prior to The Long Hiatus and had only been able to edit and add stuff to pre-drafted posts. When Ern became a prosecutor, that was the last straw. People just kept committing crimes! Ern has 753 cases right now, but she's gotten better at handling them and doesn't have to be in the office as much. So the blog is back on (although there should be some dead periods. Trials, you know.)</div>
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We still managed to watch the last season of one of the best shows in history. Here's a rundown of our thoughts.</div>
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The standout episodes were the premiere, Ozymandius, and the finale. The premiere was great because of how it handled Hank knowing about Walt. Instead of dragging it out or jumping to the climax of that storyline immediately, the show gave us what we really wanted to see: an anger-fueled confrontation with Hank punching Walt in the face. Kick ass.</div>
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Ozymandius is the episode where EVERYTHING happened. Walt Jr. heard the truth and was cool FOR ONCE. He is the only person who finds out about Walt to immediately do the right thing and call the police. He actually took his mom's side for the first time and defended her. After five years of hating gloomy, mopey Walt Jr., we finally liked him. </div>
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And Hank! So sad. But he went out himself, not begging. </div>
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The finale was perfect…except for one thing. Our gripe is that there were no surprises. But maybe that's good. Shows have tried to do finale twists and just ruined everything. Breaking Bad gave the fans what they wanted.</div>
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We got closure, Jesse lived, Walt redeemed himself a little, Lydia died, Todd died, Jesse chose to spare Walt, Walt finally admitted that he didn't cook meth for his family, and Walt died. The series absolutely needed to end with Walt dying. There was an alternative idea floating around the writers room: to have everyone BUT Walt die, including his family, but that would have been to bleak.</div>
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It was a satisfying, feel-good ending that ultimately fit a feel-good show. It might have been a dark topic, but the show had enough humor and intensity that it almost always felt good to watch. </div>
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As far as the other episodes go, we liked the one where Hank and Marie watched Walt's hilarious, brilliant confession video. We liked that Walt told Jesse about Jane dying. We like that Skyler didn't die. It would have given all the sexist Skyler haters too much to cheer about. We both loved Skyler. Deal with it.</div>
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We also liked seeing how scared Jesse was of Walt. This entire series, Walt has been manipulating Jesse to the point of near abuse. When Jesse was working with Hank, he revealed that he thought of Walt as a near-magical figure. It explains plenty of Jesse's actions over the months.</div>
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Not that Jesse is innocent. In the end, he deserved everything that happened to him because of his poor, selfish choices early on. Sure, he could never have foreseen all the consequences, but we're not in the camp that thinks Jesse is a perfect angel just because he has a soft spot for kids.</div>
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We do love Jesse though. We are glad he lived. We like that he got away with no profit even more. He's back at square one. He doesn't have millions. He has to start over…and he probably should. </div>
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There were moments after the first episode and before Ozymandius where the show had an odd tone and dragged a little. But the writers pulled everything back together quickly. Everything from the beginning, all the themes and details, came back for the end and tied together perfectly. The final season fit what came before it. </div>
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Season grade: A</div>
Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-86679934006000887292013-10-25T21:56:00.002-07:002013-10-25T21:56:40.176-07:00Get readyWe are returning to the blogErn and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-10343105002978667302013-07-01T14:27:00.000-07:002013-07-01T14:27:40.492-07:00Under the Dome- PilotWell, for summer fare, that was probably the best thing we could ever hope to get. HOWEVER, the pilot spent so much time meeting people and setting things up that the show could go anywhere from here. It could be a little like LOST...or it could be a little like Terra Nova. Bleck.<br />
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So far, so good though.<br />
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We've got a wide range of characters, motivations, and even a few promising secrets. We don't know the answer to the ultimate secret: What is the source of the dome? Stephen King said, in a letter to his fans, that the showrunners changed his ending.<br />
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This is just as well, because King's ending was kind of lame. Hopefully the TV series takes what worked in the novel (which is a lot) and runs with it, cutting the stuff that can be trimmed. For what it's worth, Stephen King approves of the series and is even an executive producer.<br />
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One of our grandmothers changed the channel when the cow got split in half, but we thought it was awesome.<br />
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There's not much else to say. There's potential for goodness and failure. We'll let you know how it goes if you want to wait and see.<br />
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<b>Episode grade: B</b>Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-83645462214234529192013-07-01T13:58:00.001-07:002013-07-01T13:58:28.727-07:00Freaks and GeeksYeah, one of us had never seen this (and the other one of us hadn't seen it in a really long time and didn't remember it very well). Can you believe that? So we watched all 18 episodes on Instant Netflix in the past two days. That should give you a hint as to where this post is going.<br />
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This is a great show for people who are out of high school. If you're in college or older, you can appreciate this show. Most high school and middle school students would be better off sticking to the shows aimed at them: Pretty Little Liars, Gossip Girl, The Secret Life of the American Teenager, etc. Mature teens will like and relate to Freaks and Geeks though.<br />
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We were hooked very early on. This show is like a more mature version of The Wonder Years, only set in the '80s and focusing on two teens, a boy and a girl, rather than just one Kevin Arnold. Another comparison: Did you ever wonder what My So-Called Life would have been like if it were funny?<br />
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We can't think of anything bad to say about this show except that the pacing and humor might be off for some people, but that comes down to personal taste, not quality. The music is great. It's all from around that era, and one episode features music entirely from The Who. We love The Who.<br />
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The cast is perfect and you'll see a lot of familiar faces that made it big later. James Franco, Seth Rogan, Jason Segel, Rashida Jones, Busy Phillips from Cougar Town, Leslie Mann, Lizzy Caplan, and Samaire Armstrong from The O.C. are all in it. What's more, they're all good in it.<br />
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We always appreciate when female characters are well-written and when sexist stereotypes are called out on a show through a mention, a joke, or a nod. This is the case here. The main female character, Lindsey, is just as likable, funny, and complex as her male costars.<br />
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Romance is not the main focus of the show in any way. Lindsey's life doesn't revolve around getting some guy or keeping a boyfriend. She's more interested in finding out who she is and experimenting. She's more consumed with her relationships with friends and family than guys.<br />
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Love stories appear on the show, but in a realistic way rather than a dumb, romanticized way. We did not immediately guess who Lindsay's main love interest would be. We expected it to be someone else, but her relationship with that guy stayed platonic in the first season.<br />
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We think Jason Segel stole the show with his portrayal of Nick, a sweet, dumb pothead who fears that he will have to go into the military if he doesn't get good at drums...and he's really bad at drums. We actually liked his song that Seth Rogan stopped him from performing!<br />
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This show is a classic for its realistic portrayal of high school students. Most of the cast members are either high-school aged or close to it. The scripts are witty and have an undertone of wry, realistic Judd Apatow humor. The show captures the awkwardness of being a high school geek boy and the confusion of being a high school girl.<br />
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The only complaint we have is that there isn't more of this show to watch. While there is some closure at the end of the season, there were many more potential storylines left untapped and a few relationships ended in a sort of limbo. Still, recommended.<br />
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<b>Show grade: A</b>Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-79109057819193327822013-06-24T05:56:00.002-07:002013-06-24T05:56:20.022-07:00Hello Germans!Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-91364521341526438032013-06-19T17:30:00.005-07:002013-06-19T17:31:39.802-07:00Pretty Little Liars: Season 4, episodes 1-2.<div class="p1">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Okay, we don't exactly know why our blog views have skyrocketed in the past week, but it makes sense that it's the return of Pretty Little Liars. That means we'd better write about it, right? Give the people what they want!</span></div>
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<a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">For some reason, we thought the show would immediately abandon the ruse that Ali is dead, especially after she's been seen by a Liar and Mona. But no. They just give us her mom and the Liars finally starting to truly suspect their friend isn't dead and gone. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We love Ali's mom. She's an alcoholic and a little bit of a manipulative witch. She taunts Hanna subtly about her weight (making it sound like a compliment). </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We'd just like to leave this here for teenage girls reading this: Don't talk about another person's weight, whether it's a diss or a compliment. It's not your business and any comment, even a nice one, can be taken too seriously and as encouragement to starve. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Also, if you'd like to love your own body more, stop talking about YOUR weight, diet habits, clothing sizes, desires, and workouts. The less you complain about it, the less it's on your mind. To really axe the body stress, don't read women's magazines. Seriously, they are classless, dumb, and sexist. Rant over. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We loved the flashback with Ali holding her breath at lunch with her mother. We also loved the parrot.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We think everyone was disappointed to find out there was a dead pig in the trunk. That didn't really fit the girls' gasps. If we had been there, we would have just groaned. But who's sad that Wilden is gone? Um, no one. He was the worst and the creepiest. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Do we believe Mona is with the girls? It would be nice to believe it, and she seems sincere. "A" tried to kill her this week as well. We are Mona fans and would like to see her working with the Liars more, so the first two episodes have been a treat for us. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Speaking of treats: no more nauseating Ezria! They are completely broken up. Sure, they've broken up before, but it seems real this time. It was cruel of the show to taunt us with a fantasy vision of Ezra getting arrested like he deserves. Oh, if only.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We guess he has a son now, so that would be too cruel. It would also entangle Aria in more Ezra drama, which would bore us. There's almost no way Ezria isn't endgame but for now…hey there, Sensei! Nice to meet you. It's annoying that Aria is crushing on yet another TEACHER, but better him than ol' Fish Face.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Paige is obviously going to die since she's planning to steal Emily away from Rosewood. Aww, think how happy Ems would be! "A" would never allow that. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Emily's storyline was particularly intriguing this week. She is stressed about getting into Stanford and has a hurt shoulder from A's last attack (that she really should have seen a doctor about), so she OD's on painkillers and nearly drowns during the swim meet, ending up in the hospital. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It's cool to get more of Toby's motivations behind why he's still helping A. It has to do with his dead mother. She was in Radley and committed suicide just as she was showing signs of getting better. "A" got Toby his mother's file. We like seeing layers to Toby and finding out more of his secrets. More of this storyline, please!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We were weirdly happy when Spencer didn't get into UPenn. It's probably best that she break family tradition, since her family is a little crazy and neurotic. Also, it gets annoying when all teen shows have these impossible brainiacs who all get into Ivy League schools. There are plenty of great students who don't get into those schools. On TV, it's like kids are either flunking out or going to Yale with Rory Gilmore. Additionally, Spencer did copy Melissa's paper that one time, and cheaters don't deserve to go to a school that awesome. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Do you guys think Ezra was right to discourage Spencer to talk about her mental problems in her essay? On the one hand, there is a huge, unfair stigma associated with mental health issues, even though most of us will have one at one time over the course of our lives. On the other, the essay would definitely stand out and someone might understand what a bad ass Spencer is. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We don't know where the show is going with Ashley Marin's troubles and secrets. We don't think PLL would actually kill Hanna's mom, so there's not as much tension there for us as you might think.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Our only problem with this show right now is that there are too many standalone scenes that are a waste of time, don't have interesting dialogue or quips, or don't move things along. Every scene that isn't contributing directly to plot needs to at least have some good character development.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Episode 1 grade: B</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Episode 2 grade: B+</b></span></div>
Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-69646793319302181872013-06-10T15:19:00.002-07:002013-06-10T15:19:47.183-07:00Dan Harmon is Officially Coming Back to Community for Season 5!!!!YESSSSSS<br />
<br />
Now we'll start watching it againErn and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-31258063760833819192013-06-10T10:30:00.001-07:002013-06-10T10:30:36.366-07:00Burning TV questions that only time can answer/things we're worried about:<ol class="ol1">
<li class="li1">Will they drag Pretty Little Liars on too long?</li>
<li class="li1">Will Supernatural ever be good again? Will Homeland be able to match the quality of its first season next year? </li>
<li class="li1">Will Breaking Bad and Dexter have endings worthy of them? And can they please let Jesse Pinkman live?</li>
<li class="li1">Will George R.R. Martin's sixth book be better than four and five? Will he actually end it on the seventh? Can he finish on time to stay ahead of the show?</li>
<li class="li1">Will the next crop of new shows be better than the new shows last year, of which there was maybe one good effort?</li>
<li class="li1">Has Once Upon a Time completely lost its thunder, and will the show ever make sense? Ditto The Vampire Diaries.</li>
<li class="li1">Will the 24 reunion be good, or will it be like 24:Redemption, the awful movie?</li>
<li class="li1">Will they make more of the (still excellent) Arrested Development series or will the haters shut it down?</li>
<li class="li1">Will people inexplicably keep watching Arrow and keep it on the air?</li>
<li class="li1">Will Bunheads ever have anything resembling a plot?</li>
</ol>
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ERGHHHH</div>
Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-43772457026946379772013-06-10T07:09:00.005-07:002013-07-06T23:34:57.731-07:00Game of Thrones season 3, episode 10 (and commentary on the whole season and favorite moments)<div class="p1">
<b>Mhysa</b>- We think everyone was surprised at how few big events were in the finale. And the show gave us yet another Dany ending. Mmkay. We've had quite a few of those. </div>
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Book readers know that there were a handful of things the show could have explored or shown in the finale and any one of them would have been good. For the most part, the characters didn't move much. </div>
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<a name='more'></a>We do like that the show set things up for next season. We might not have been able, emotionally, to handle another big thing from this show unless it was a happy thing. And saving some big things for next year will allow the show to spend the proper amount of time on them and really do it right.<br />
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Davos is the best and everyone knows it. We're glad Gendry was spared, especially Leeard, because she's pretty much in love with him. Ern is in love with NO ONE since they killed Robb Stark, but she appreciated the mutilation of his body in this episode. </div>
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The torturer was revealed to be Roose Bolton's sadistic bastard. He's broken every last ounce of Theon Greyjoy's self-respect. We know Ramsay Snow is going to be a big and sick villain going forward. How cool is Yara though? Is she a dark horse contender for the iron throne? Because we have no doubt she could handle it and also keep her humanity. </div>
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We were disappointed that the show didn't let us see the severed penis because a) we're disgusting and b) they show chopped up women on TV and in movies all the time. We guess they haven't on this show, so it gets a pass.</div>
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Walder Frey (Filch) was unbearable in the aftermath. He needs to get a comeuppance. For some reason, we don't hate Roose Bolton as much. Maybe because he hates Walder Frey as much as we do. And because Roose isn't as nasty.</div>
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The most exciting ad obviously needed development was Sam's return to the wall and meeting of Bran. We love that Sam was smart enough to guess that Bran is Jon's brother. We loved that he helped them. It's also good that the whole kingdom is finally warned about the white walkers and armies of the dead. That announcement needed to be made like a year ago.</div>
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If you haven't read the books, you don't know that Ygritte only shot Jon in the back of the foot. The show went for attempted murder to heighten the drama of their breakup and his return. We don't know how we feel about this. It's pretty sad that she shot him, but we love when the show surprises us.</div>
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Stannis has been a real dick all season. Pull it together, Stannis.</div>
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Question: Did Tyrion get Varys to offer Shae a getaway? She said, "If he wants me to leave, he can tell me himself." Does that mean he sent a mediator? Or does it just mean that she wants to wait for his opinion? Either way, sad. </div>
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The show is handling this storyline perfectly. And, really, if she were smart and not in love, she would take the diamonds and run. Tyrion is technically married to Sansa. He won't run away with Shae. Shae can never really have him or a good life if she stays. </div>
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We were disappointed that we didn't get to see more of Jaime's reunion with his family. But Lena Headey's choice of facial expression almost gave us enough to tide us over. It was a mixture of love, horror, happiness, disgust, relief, anger, and devastation. </div>
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That face said so much. It tells us that while she still has feelings for Jaime, she will have a hard (if not impossible) time accepting this new, powerless version.</div>
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We're excited that Arya used her coin to call her old face changing friend. We loved her revenge on the guy who sewed Grey Wind's head on Robb's body. Arya is, and always will be, a bad ass. Is she a good person anymore? Not really. Revenge and hatred have transformed her. But it's the mark of how much viewers love strong women that we all still love her. </div>
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We loved Tyrion and Sansa getting along and finding commonality in being town freaks. Too bad it didn't last past Sansa hearing the red wedding news. We're glad the show immediately revealed Tywin's hand in it. We also loved when Tyrion told Joffrey that Sansa wasn't his to torment anymore. Tyrion is the best in every way. </div>
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We feel that the four main characters are Tyrion, Bran, Dany, and Jon. These are the four that really carry their own stories and keep the audience apprised of what's going on in every corner of the world. All four are likable (so far), but Tyrion is the obvious favorite. Dany is a close second. The rest of the point of view characters are secondary main characters. </div>
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The funny thing about Tywin's hatred for Tyrion is that, out of all of his kids, Tyrion is the one who's the chip off the old block. Even as Tyrion was offended that Tywin butchered his enemies at a wedding where they were supposed to be safe and treated as guests, Tyrion admired it. </div>
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Tyrion is the craftiest of the Lannister kids. He's just not as evil. We loved that Tywin's cold exterior broke when he told Tyrion that he wanted to drown him as a baby. You could see the tears welling up. Fantastic.</div>
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Okay, we get that Sansa is supposed to be innocent and 14 in the show, but she's a little too naive in this episode. She doesn't know the word "shit," and she's been hanging out with Joffrey, the Hound, Cersei, and Tyrion. </div>
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Also, she had two older brothers. Nice brothers, but still. Her innocence is stretching believability. A lot of it is that the actress is 17 and she looks 17. And you can see intelligence in that girl's eyes. Fewer of those jokes would be much appreciated next season.</div>
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<b>Episode grade: B</b></div>
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<b>Season three- </b>This season alternated between awesome moments and dull filler designed to keep the entire cast in our minds and kill time so that the first half of book three could span ten episodes. This was a good season just because of the sheer number of great moments. </div>
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The awesomeness: </div>
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</div>
<ul>
<li>The red wedding. It ripped our hearts out and shocked the world, but it was still awesome. </li>
<li>Margaery charming Joffrey and the capital. </li>
<li>Jaime's hand. Jaime's redemption arc. Tyrion and Cersei getting along. </li>
<li>Tywin running the capital. </li>
<li>Finding out that Jaime has saved half a million lives. </li>
<li>Brienne beating Jaime in a fight. </li>
<li>Arya killing her first man. </li>
<li>Beric Dondarrion's flaming sword. </li>
<li>Shireen and Davos's relationship. </li>
<li>Yara going after her little brother and the early birth of Reek. </li>
<li>Ygritte stealing Jon's virginity. Jon and Ygritte kissing on the wall to the sound of that beautiful music. Ygritte teasing Jon. </li>
<li>Sansa and Tyrion's awkward and hilarious wedding. </li>
<li>Tyrion threatening Joffrey…twice. </li>
<li>Every scene with Olenna Tyrell. </li>
<li>Daenerys turning on Astapor and the sweet final moment this season with the slaves. </li>
<li>Finally getting to know what Bran's role in all this will be. </li>
<li>Cat Stark, vengeful bad ass. </li>
<li>The show having the stones to put Grey Wind's head on Robb's body, thus ensuring that everyone will understand Ern's sick Halloween costume muah haha. </li>
<li>Cersei's face when she sees Jaime at the end. </li>
<li>All the butts. This was the season of butts.</li>
</ul>
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But when none of that was going on, the show was a ponderous snore. We can't wait for next season because we know there's a lot more of those good moments coming up. We're ready for the show to adapt more material at once though. </div>
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They aren't afraid to reach into the future and pull events to give them to us early. We're curious to see how they do books four and five. They will probably have events in both books going on simultaneously. </div>
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Let's see… In hindsight, we'd give the first season a B+ and the second season an A. <b>An A- feels right for season 3.</b></div>
Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-42116759165796244152013-06-05T18:18:00.003-07:002013-06-05T18:18:50.965-07:00Arrested Development Season 4, Episode 8 recap/review<div class="p1" style="color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;">
<span style="line-height: 1.4;"><b>Red Hairing</b>- Lindsay</span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 1.4;">Lindsay is living at Marky Bark's desert ostrich farm. She has an adorable short haircut. </span></div>
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Marky tells Lindsay that he was the one who tried to scare the CEOs off the desert land (the Native-American/Ostrich-looking guy who talked to George Sr. and Oscar. Marky and Lindsay are upset that they keep finding numbed desert animals that appear to be dead. Oh, Dr. Norman.</div>
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<a name='more'></a>Tired of living in the desert, Lindsay recommends moving into Lucille's penthouse after she hears her mother lost her trial. Marky agrees, as long as they can take an ostrich, Cindy.<br />
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One year later, the apartment smells like urine and is nearly destroyed. Every time Lindsay walks in the door, she has to announce herself, because Marky's face blindness prevents him from recognizing her.</div>
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Marky tells Lindsay that he has a plan to bomb Herbert Love at the upcoming Opie awards. The bomb is just a glitter bomb. Silver glitter and blue ink.</div>
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Marky plans to hide in the podium with the bomb and wait until Lindsay knocks to let him know the coast is clear. Then he will pull the pin in the bomb and leave the podium. Thirty minutes later, the bomb will go off.</div>
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Lindsay would rather support Love's opponent, Lucille 2, but Marky says she's part of the problem. <span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;">Lindsay has secretly been visiting Lucille 2 and was offered a position as her campaign manager.</span></div>
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Lucille 2 gives Lindsay a red wig and some clothes that are not made of hemp, for which Lindsay is grateful. <span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;">Lindsay finds a check for Maeby in her mail for $50,000. It says, "From: Gangie 4 Facelift."</span></div>
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Lindsay confronts her mother, who is playing tennis in a high-end prison, for trying to buy Maeby plastic surgery. Lucille reiterates that she and Lindsay are similar people. Lindsay decides to help Marky in his radical plan to prove that she is an activist.</div>
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At the Opie's, Lindsay, wearing the red wig, sees her father and gives him the $50,000 check that Marky told her to rip up. </div>
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She also runs into her daughter Maeby, who respects her mother for attempting a protest. Maeby tells her mother that she is at the Opies to receive a lifetime achievement award for her work in the entertainment industry, but Lindsay doesn't believe her.</div>
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Lindsay meets Herbert Love but doesn't know who he is, because Marky showed her a picture of Nat King Cole, and he has face blindness. Lindsay really doesn't know music, because she didn't recognize the singer.</div>
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Lindsay and Herbert are attracted to each other and spend so much time flirting that Lindsay forgets all about Marky. Marky is in the podium when the bomb goes off, because Gob wedged the podium shut.</div>
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Marky is led out by police, and he's covered in the blue ink. This gives Lindsay an unattractive feeling of deja vu.</div>
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Herbert Love gives Lindsay his phone number and Maeby sees it. Maeby loses her respect for her mother all over again and tells Lindsay who Herbert Love actually is.</div>
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Marky looks for Lindsay, but she doesn't identify herself when Marky sees her. She catches a cab back to her penthouse. She's being evicted.</div>
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The next morning, Lindsay goes to visit Marky in prison. Marky's charges are serious and he needs the $50,000 check to help him out. Lindsay tells him that the check is gone.</div>
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Lindsay goes to the model home to give Maeby a piece of her mind for calling her a whore. Maeby surprisingly encourages Lindsay to go out with Herbert Love and even calls him herself to set up the date for her mother. </div>
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Lindsay goes out on her first date with Herbert Love, using the alias "Cindy Featherbottom." Herbert Love is a disgusting and obnoxious guy with the cheesiest sense of humor ever. She tries to get him to drop the charges against Marky, but Herbert Love distracts her with compliments.</div>
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Lindsay runs into her brother, who asks her to get Herbert Love to change his position on the proposed wall between the U.S. and Mexico. Lindsay agrees, but only if Michael will talk to the warden (who is part of Michael's movie dream team) into letting Marky out. </div>
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Michael agrees, and he also gets Lindsay to sign away her rights for his movie. Meanwhile, George Michael continues to avoid his father and cancel plans to hang out with him.</div>
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Lindsay and Herbert Love get a hotel room and have sex. Lindsay makes no actual political inroads, but Herbert Love makes her his "key advisor," so that he can keep her around.</div>
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Lindsay and Michael go on a double date together (with Rebel and Herbert Love). They pretend not to know each other. </div>
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Rebel Alley takes issue with Herbert Love's politics, and the night is not a fun one. Rebel ends up leaving early, and Herbert Love ditches Lindsay to spend time with his wife and kids.</div>
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Because Lindsay and Michael put their food on the Bluth tab, and Annyong was at the restaurant leeching off the Bluth tab, Annyong ends up stuck with the bill and loses his freedom.</div>
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The warden lets Marky out of jail just in time for Cinco De Cuatro. Marky plans to set off a real bomb on Love's boat on the holiday. He then plans to take Lindsay on a getaway boat to Mexico where they will meet up with her horrible mom.</div>
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At the celebration, Herbert Love dumps Lindsay after his wife finds out about them and then pays her for her services. Lindsay is shocked to find that Herbert Love thinks she's a prostitute and tries to throw the money back in his face. She cannot.</div>
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Lindsay runs into her mother, who knows that Lindsay has been Herbert Love's hooker. Lucille reaffirms that Lindsay should be who she is: an Orange County, Waspy princess who only cares for herself. </div>
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<span style="line-height: 1.4;">Lucille says it's okay to be this way. Lucille tells Lindsay that she is a Bluth.</span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 1.4;">Lindsay ditches the red wig and goes to get revenge on Herbert Love. She goes to Lucille 2 and offers to run her campaign, but Lucille 2 has already hired Sally Sitwell, Lindsay's longtime rival.</span></div>
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Lucille 2 tells Lindsay that Sally has a) integrity and b) beautiful long hair, so she is more qualified than Lindsay. Also, photos of Lindsay sleeping with Herbert Love all over town have surfaced. Lucille 2 wants to go viral with the photos so that she can win the election.</div>
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<span style="line-height: 1.4;">Herbert Love has gone missing at the Cinco event, even though he has a speech planned in front of several supporters. A staff member on his campaign grabs Lindsay, Love's "key advisor," and Lindsay agrees to cover the speech.</span></div>
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Lindsay starts out trying to turn the crowd against Herbert Love, but Hispanic rioters interrupt the speech, ruin Lindsay's necklace, and start trashing the event. Angry at them, Lindsay abandons her politics and revenge plan.</div>
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She starts saying that Hispanic people don't belong here and that there SHOULD be a wall to keep out the Mexicans. She leads the crowd in a chant of "put up this wall."</div>
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Lindsay says, "My name is Lindsay Bluth. And this is who I am." <span style="line-height: 1.4;">Herbert Love is found, but he's in a coma. Lindsay is asked to run in his place, and she accepts. </span></div>
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<span style="line-height: 1.4;">It's kind of beautiful (in a dark sort of way, because it is this show) that Lindsay ends up finding her place in the family. We are happy to see her ditch the fake activism, because that joke has been done over and over with this character.</span></div>
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Arrested Development was a very Bush-era show, politically, in its original run. The political jokes have been updated. Having Lindsay turn into a Michelle Bachman-type character is more timely.</div>
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This episode was superior to the first Lindsay episode, and we liked that one well enough. We also loved seeing Portia as a red head. The look works for her.</div>
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<strong>Episode grade: B+</strong></div>
Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-11386498910400873502013-06-04T17:20:00.001-07:002013-06-04T17:20:02.709-07:00Note to commentersWe've had 100 comments this week that were spam comments. Notice that none of them have appeared on this blog. If you are leaving a BS comment and your own website, the comment is deleted. If it's an ad, it's deleted. We moderate the comments. Stahp. You're wasting your time.<br />
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Legitimate comments are encouraged, welcomed, and answered :-)Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-85468410417110656762013-06-04T11:58:00.001-07:002013-06-04T11:58:41.813-07:00New show: The Fosters- Season 1, Episode 1<div style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px; margin-bottom: 10px; outline: none 0px;">
This is show from ABCFamily about a family with two adopted kids and a new foster daughter, as well as a biological son. If that sounds too traditional for you, know that the parents are also two women. And the family is multi-racial. </div>
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We’re pretty stoked. There are already a few conservative, religious groups opposing the show, but talk is cheap and people will always complain. The joke’s on them. The show is getting free publicity from all the attention they are giving it.</div>
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Probably the best thing about this show is that it will make teens grow up thinking that fostering children when they are grown up will be a cool thing to do. It’s a great option and one that more conservatives should take, rather than going for their perfect, comfortable lives. </div>
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It’s one thing to say you love God and others; It’s another thing to open your home.</div>
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Hopefully the show will have more people considering this, including the haters who are focusing on the wrong thing as usual (other people’s choices instead of how to serve those others).</div>
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This is a good show to pair with Switched At Birth, another program about people coming together to form an abnormal family. </div>
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The pilot was nice and entertaining, if predictable. It did a good job of introducing all the characters and the family dynamic. We liked most of the characters so far. </div>
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It’s hard to judge how good the show will be going forward, but we’re interested in seeing what’s next. We hope things don’t get too perfect or too sappy, but we also hope that the characters avoid getting unlikeable like on Life, Unexpected.</div>
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Mariana’s dilemma and poor choices are particularly intriguing, and we love what a nice guy Brandon is. We love that Stef is a police officer. The people on the show are down-to-Earth and not preachy, which is a great thing.</div>
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There’s also some humor, which could be amped up a little in less dramatic episodes. The pacing was good. We’re into this so far. Good music too.</div>
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<strong style="box-sizing: border-box; outline: none 0px;">Episode grade: B+</strong></div>
Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-87317545386439706622013-06-04T11:33:00.002-07:002013-06-04T11:41:39.028-07:00Teen Wolf Season 3, episode 1<div class="p1" style="color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19px;">
<span style="line-height: 1.4;"><strong>Tattoo</strong>- This episode didn't hold our attention the entire time. Also, the opening scene went on for too long. </span></div>
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It's common for a show to open right in the middle of action, but it's not as interesting as shows seem to think it is. The best opening has tension, but a dialogue-filled tension. </div>
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A perfect example would be the opening of Inglorious Basterds.</div>
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We're sad to see Jackson has left, because we liked his character and thought he was hot. We're also wondering where Peter is too. </div>
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We liked the new female character that the new alpha, Deucalion, might have killed. We hope he didn't.</div>
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Also, we're going to have so much fun spelling his name all season. (Sarcasm) Deucalion wants to get Derek to kill his whole pack. </div>
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The best thing about the episode was the animal suicides. Very creepy and creative. We loved the bird scene.</div>
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We also like the new teacher and the way she started class. We're glad that Scott is focusing on school more, but who studies for the PSATs? Those matter even less than the real SATs. </div>
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It looks like it's going to be a good season. Love Allison's new haircut; hate Scott's tattoo. We agree with Stiles. Get a tattoo that means something to you or is funny, not just a tattoo for the sake of getting a tattoo. </div>
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As long as we have interaction between Stiles and his cop father in every episode, we'll continue to be happy with this show.<br />
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That won't stop us from laughing at the super-buff, manly looking freshman this show is trying to pass off as being 14.</div>
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<b>Episode grade: B</b></div>
Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-76766841260631025802013-06-03T07:00:00.001-07:002013-06-03T07:00:05.593-07:00Game of Thrones season 3, episode 9<div class="p1">
<b>The Rains of Castamere- I</b>t's been 12 hours, so now we're ready to write about the Red Wedding. Even reading the books couldn't have fully prepared us for the visceral shock and tragedy of that scene. </div>
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<a name='more'></a>For one thing, they added Talisa to the mix. In the books, Robb's wife was far from the Twins and fans speculated that she might be pregnant and have the heir to the north tucked away until he was ready to rule. Since George R.R. Martin has a hand in the show, it's safe to say that whatever becomes of Jeyne Westerling (Robb's wife's name in the books), she is not important.<br />
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The worst visual was Talisa getting stabbed repeatedly in the stomach. After that, Robb just gave up. He was in more shock than we were. Cat, bless her, fought to the end. </div>
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We loved that she killed that young girl. That's just who she is. A stone heart. She definitely keeps HER word.</div>
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A lot of people say they don't like Robb Stark, to which we say, "We don't like you. He was hot and perfect." </div>
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A lot of people say he deserved it for not listening to his mom, not playing the social politics game well enough, and breaking his word. To which we say…yeah, but does the punishment really fit the crime? Overkill.</div>
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It's safe to say that Leeard cried a lot. The betrayal and the happy wedding (and such a brutal one at that) was a gut punch.</div>
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Ern watched it with family, and they are still mad at her for getting into the show in the first place so they could feel this level of depressed stunned. Ern's brother said, "I'm so depressed about it and there's nothing I can do about it."</div>
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One other thing we are upset about this week was Jon Snow ditching Ygritte, after she has been nothing but good to him. She annoys a lot of people, but we think she's smart, funny, and adorable. Poor Ygritte. </div>
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The writer of the series said the Red Wedding had to happen and that if someone dies and we just move on without any emotion, it's just shallow, popcorn entertainment. Brutal shocks are usually shallow. But not this time.</div>
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<b>Episode grade: A</b></div>
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And for more RW-themed stuff, head to our tumblr, where we are grieving and reblogging good posts that will make you even more depressed.</div>
Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-79070804338932431822013-06-02T08:00:00.000-07:002013-06-12T06:26:29.200-07:00Pretty Little Liars show summary: Updated to include all of season 3. <div class="p1">
And now, before season four starts, a synopsis of the last three seasons. </div>
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First, a few characters:</div>
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<b>Alison DiLaurentis</b>- The dead girl who started it all. Alison DiLaurentis is the Liars' friend who was murdered. She was a fabulous, evil bitch. She often shows up in flashbacks (thank God)</div>
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Liar #1:<b>Aria Montgomery</b>- Aria is the Liar wearing too many accessories and crazy outfits at all time. She's mature, outgoing, and artistic (kind of). Her parents are the awesome<b> Ella Montgomery</b> and the lame <b>Byron Montgomery</b>, and she has a younger brother named <b>Mike Montgomery</b>, who is rarely seen. We suspect Aria of being "A."</div>
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<a name='more'></a>Liar #2: <b>Spencer Hastings</b>: Spencer is a bad ass. She's known for her Hermione Granger-like smarts and ambition. She's kind of high strung and crazy, but in the best way. Spencer is the only person in the group who stood up to Alison and who Alison feared. Spencer's parents are <b>Peter Hastings</b> and <b>Veronica Hastings</b>. She has an older sister, <b>Melissa</b> <b>Hastings</b>, and they do not get along. This is partly because Spencer always steals Melissa's men. As for Spencer's half-brother, well, we'll get to that.<br />
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Liar #3: <b>Hanna Marin</b>: Absolutely the funniest person on the show. Her mother is <b>Ashley Marin</b>. Hanna is the blonde.</div>
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Liar #4: <b>Emily Fields</b>: Emily is probably the best person of the four liars. She's a swimmer. She's gay. She's kind of boring compared to the other girls, but we still love her. She's really sweet and seemingly fragile, so when "A" picks on her, it's the saddest. The others can kind of handle it.</div>
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So...<b>season</b> <b>one</b>. Alison DiLaurentis, the tyrannical leader of a group of five friends, disappears. A year later, Alison's still missing and the four Liars are not friends anymore. Aria and her family spent a year in Iceland after Aria caught her professor father sleeping with a student. Aria is still keeping it a secret, and we find out that Alison knew as well.</div>
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Aria goes to a bar and meets<b> Ezra Fitz</b>. Ern thinks Ezra has a Fish Face. They hit it off and kiss passionately. When Aria gets to school, she finds out that Ezra is her new English teacher. Oops. Aria gets the first text from the mysterious, near-omniscient "A," a brilliant fiend who is out to torment the four Liars. It says, "Maybe he fools around with students all of the time. A lot of teachers do. Just ask your dad."</div>
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Meanwhile, Hanna and Spencer see each other at the mall. Hanna, struggling with her parents' divorce, shoplifts a pair of sunglasses and is later arrested, but her mother, Ashley Marin, sleeps with the cop, <b>Detective Wilden</b>, to get Hanna out of trouble. Emily meets her new next-door neighbor, <b>Maya</b>, who moved into Alison's old house. Emily has a boyfriend, but she develops instant feelings for Maya. They smoke weed together. "A" notices the sparks and sends Emily a text about it, also implying that "A" knew that Emily had a thing for Alison DiLaurentis.</div>
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Spencer meets her sister's fiancé, <b>Dr. Wren</b>, who is hot, British, and young. Spencer soon kisses Wren, and her sister, Melissa, dumps him. This isn't a first for Spencer. She kissed Melissa's last boyfriend, <b>Ian</b>, and Alison knew about it. Of course, "A" sends Spencer a text teasing her about her man-poaching ways. "A" also sends Hanna a text implying that "A" knows all their secrets that Alison knew. The four suspect that Alison is still alive, but the police find her body soon after that. At Alison's funeral, we meet <b>Jenna Cavanaugh</b>, who is always wearing huge sunglass because she's blind. "A" texts the Liars: "I'm still here bitches. And I know everything."</div>
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Jenna hates the Liars because they were present when Alison accidentally blinded Jenna by setting Jenna's garage on fire. This was meant as a prank on Jenna's weird step-brother, <b>Toby Cavanaugh</b>, the outcast who everyone suspects of murdering Alison. Emily befriends Toby and also breaks up with her horrible boyfriend, <b>Ben</b>, and starts seeing Maya. When "A" sends Emily's parents a picture of Maya and Emily kissing, Emily's mom is devastated to find out that her daughter is gay. Emily's dad accepts Emily faster, but her mom gets Maya sent to a religious camp by telling Maya's parents about her pot-smoking habit.</div>
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The threats and texts from "A" continue. The Liars suspect Jenna of being "A." "A" has moved beyond just texts to IMs, emails, cupcakes, letters, lipstick on mirrors (yes, A is trespassing), radio broadcasts, and more. Aria's mom, Ella Montgomery, receives a message from "A", telling her about Byron's cheating. The Montgomery parents separate. Hanna has a boyfriend named <b>Sean</b>, but he sucks. Hanna meets a nerdy boy named <b>Lucas</b> who worships her. Hanna finds out that her dad, who left her mom, has a fiancé. The fiance has a horrible daughter, <b>Kate</b>.</div>
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Spencer meets a cute, poor boy at the country club where she plays tennis, but "A" breaks them up. We still miss him. Tensions rise when someone vandalizes a town memorial to Alison. The FBI arrests Toby for Alison's murder after they find her blood on his sweater. He is fitted with an anklet and forced to stay in his home. Jenna is the one who turned him in so that he would be under house arrest and possibly have more sex with her. Oh yeah, we forgot to tell you that Toby used to sleep with his stepsister Jenna. She made him.</div>
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Aria briefly dates a classmate, <b>Noel Kahn</b>, in order to make her English teacher jealous/forget about her English teacher. We welcomed this, because we think an underage student dating a teacher is wrong and disgusting. We've hated that relationship from day one. Noel Kahn is hot, creepy, kind of mean, and fantastic.</div>
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But Aria and Ezra get close again, making out in a car. Someone writes "I See You" on the car's window. Hanna sees who did it (it was Noel Kahn, jealous of Aria and Fitz making out) and assumes it is "A." Before Hanna can tell anyone, "A" runs over her with a car. Hanna survives and sustains a broken leg. "A" stops by to sign Hanna's cast while Hanna sleeps. Yucky. Lucas visits Hanna in the hospital and gets upset because he wants to be more than friends with her, but she doesn't like him in that way.</div>
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Melissa's ex, Ian, returns, and the two elope, freaking Spencer out. Spencer finds some evidence that Ian and Alison DiLaurentis were together the night she died. Spencer also finds evidence that Alison and Ian spent the preceding weekend at a place called The Hilton Head together. Ian becomes the Liar's Suspect #1 for Alison's murder.</div>
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Hanna's mom, Ashley Marin, "borrows" (steals) money from the bank in which she works. Hanna returns home from the hospital and finds her mom's stolen cash stash. Hanna's formerly unpopular best friend, <b>Mona</b>, throws Hanna a Welcome Home Party where Lucas gets drunk and fights with Sean. Then Lucas confesses to ruining Alison's memorial. Alison always bullied Lucas, so he hated her.</div>
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At the party, "A" steals Ashley Marin's already stolen money. "A" uses this to taunt Hanna and force Hanna to "earn" the money back by doing shame-inducing things (like eating cupcakes and dancing with Lucas at a school function). After Hanna shares that forced dance with Lucas, Sean dumps her. Good riddance.</div>
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Later, "A" sends the Liars a video of Alison clutching dirt, breathing, and seeming to die. Ian is in the video. (We find out later that it's just a sex tape.) Sadly, Spencer's laptop and the video are stolen before the Liars can give it to the police. It is returned later with the video wiped from the hard drive. What's left is a picture of Alison walking and a shadow following her.</div>
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Aria figures out that this photo was taken from Alison's bedroom. Spencer goes to talk to <b>Jason DiLaurentis</b>, Alison's older brother, about the photo and the possibility that he could have taken it. Jason tells Spencer that he might have, but that he doesn't remember because he and Ian did a lot of drugs during that time. Also, Ian and Alison were definitely banging.</div>
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Hanna meets a cute hacker named <b>Caleb</b>. Caleb is perfect, and we will hear no word against him, ever. The actor playing him is more than competent as well. Caleb is a foster kid who ran away and lives at the school. Hanna invites Caleb to come live in her house, but keeps it a secret from her mom. They end up kissing and falling in love.</div>
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Emily has problems with her competition on the swim team, <b>Paige</b>, who bullies Emily and then dunks her underwater, in a rage. This could be interpreted as "trying to drown Emily." It's a controversial subject, haha. Paige feels bad later and confesses to Emily that she's gay too, but she doesn't have Emily's courage. A few episodes later, Paige even kisses Emily. They date briefly, but break up when Paige won't come out of the closet. Emily starts dating a blonde named <b>Samara</b> instead.</div>
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Aria finds out that her parents are secretly seeing each other again. Melissa is now pregnant with Ian's baby. Meanwhile, Aria is mooning around with Ezra and it's gross. We're not going to detail all of their drama. Just know that they worry about getting caught, break up all the time, and always get back together. "A" tries to get Hanna to expose the teacher-student relationship, but it doesn't work. And, long story short, Ashley Marin doesn't get caught for taking that money.</div>
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Spencer befriends Toby Cavanaugh after tutoring him in French. Toby is clearly afraid of his stepsister, Jenna. The evidence against Toby doesn't hold up, and Toby is released from house arrest. Toby and Spencer work together to decipher clues that could lead them to "A" and Alison's killer. They also fall for each other romantically, which never made sense to us until we saw Toby's abs.</div>
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Spencer's suspicion of Ian, general insanity, and aggressiveness get her marked as a "person of interest" in Alison's murder case. Good thing Spencer's mom is a lawyer. The Liars get into more trouble with the police after they turn in a trophy they believe to be the murder weapon. Of course, "A" is messing with them, covered the trophy with rat blood, and planted it.</div>
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Ashley Marin catches Caleb living in her house, so Hanna and Caleb run away together, camping in the woods. There, Hanna gives Caleb her virginity. Ashley feels bad and invites Caleb to stay at the house. Caleb makes a call to an unknown person and tells him/her "the deal's off." There's a reason he's been hanging around Hanna for so long...He was hired by Jenna to watch the Liars. When Hanna finds out, she ditches Caleb, throws him out of her house, and slaps Jenna so hard that the sound could be heard on other shows in that timeslot.</div>
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The Liars are sent a USB with videos that prove Alison DiLaurentis and other Rosewood girls were being stalked and secretly videoed for years. Alison took the USB from Ian (one of the stalkers), giving him a motive to kill her. There is also footage on the USB of Jenna threatening to cry rape if Toby didn't sleep with her. Gross.</div>
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Caleb tries to make things up to Hanna by writing her a goodbye letter with the phrase "I love you" in it. But Hanna never sees it. Her bestie, Mona, rips it up for Hanna's own good. Caleb boards a bus to Flagstaff where his estranged mother lives. Ezra quits his job at the high school when Byron Montgomery gets him a teaching job at Hollis College. Aria is upset because Ezra's former fiancé, <b>Jackie Molina</b>, is also working at the college. But hey, at least Ezra won't be Aria's English teacher anymore. It's marginally less disgusting now.</div>
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The Liars try to set Ian up and get a confession out of him, but he figures out that he's being trapped. He chases Spencer to the top of a bell tower and tries to kill her. "A" comes along and pushes Ian, who falls a long way. His body immediately disappears. We find out that Jenna is secretly dating a cop named <b>Garrett</b>, who the Liars knew before he joined the force. The Liars think he's a friend, but he's conspiring with Jenna. Lucas finds out that Mona ripped up Caleb's goodbye letter and drives to bring Caleb back to Rosewood. Nice of him. Also, pathetic.</div>
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<b>Season two</b></div>
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</b>The Liars' parents send them to grief counseling with therapist<b> Annabeth Gish</b>. "A" does not care for this and threatens them into keeping their mouths shut. Ella Montgomery moves back into the Montgomery house. Emily's parents move away for a job, but "A" finagles it so that Emily ends up living in Rosewood with the Marins. "A" makes it look like Emily takes performance-enhancing drugs, so Emily is thrown off the swim team.</div>
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Hanna is angry with Mona for destroying her letter. Mona dates Noel Kahn for a short time before he dumps her. Hanna rushes to comfort Mona and forgets their feud. Jason DiLaurentis buys his old house back from Maya's family and comes onto Aria, almost setting up a triangle before Aria goes weaseling back to nasty Ezra. Yeck. Also, Jason serves as another red herring for this show for a couple of episodes. Turns out, he does have a secret. He's Spencer's half brother. Daddy Peter Hastings cheated.</div>
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The Liars go through Alison's morgue files and find out that she was buried alive after having her skull bashed in. There is a page missing from the file (stolen by Jenna and Garrett). Aria runs into an intruder in Spencer's house who turns out to be her little brother, Mike, acting out because of his parents' rocky marriage, or his teenage issues, or his drug use, or that he's "A". Or whatever. We really don't know or remember, and we don't care. Because of Mike's breaking into houses and stealing, Aria finds out that Jenna is seeing Garrett.</div>
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The Liars find a text conversation between Melissa and what appears to be Ian. But Ian is found dead, shot in the head, and sitting next to a suicide note in which he admits to killing Alison DiLaurentis. The Liars quickly realize that the note was written by "A" and the suicide was faked. Melissa is devastated. Meanwhile, Hanna has a whole drama with her father and his horrific new family. If they come up again, just know that her stepsister, <b>Kate</b>, is the worst. Hanna almost parent traps her parents, but it turns out that Ashley doesn't even want the sod back. GOOD.</div>
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Hanna has a cathartic moment in Anne's office where she confronts the ghost of Alison for being such a bully. It's awesome. We're not doing it justice. This breakthrough gives Hanna the stones to stand up to Caleb's foster mom, who has been stealing from him. Hanna and Caleb finally get back together. Later, Hanna convinces Caleb to reconnect with his bio mom in California, so he leaves for a little while and comes back.</div>
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"A" starts to specifically target Emily, sneaking into a massage parlor and giving Emily a massage. Yeah, "A" had his/her hands around Em's neck. Emily is understandably freaked out, as are we all. Samara and Emily break up, but Maya comes back to town. Eventually, we find out that Jason, Ian, and Garrett used to be members of the "NAT Club," a group of guys who would film, spy on, and stalk Rosewood's girls. The Liars go to their therapist and spill everything. "A" starts targeting the therapist, who disappears just after leaving a message for the Liars that she figured out who "A" is.</div>
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"A" leaves each of the Liars a creepy doll with a message. The messages give the Liars one task that they must perform in order to save the therapist. Hanna has to ruin her dad's wedding by telling his fiancé that he cheated on her with his ex for a hot minute. Hanna performs this task, alienating her father, but it doesn't stop the marriage in the end. Aria has to blackmail Ezra's ex, Jackie Molina, into leaving town using evidence that Jackie plagiarized an important academic paper.</div>
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Spencer has to keep Toby safe, which would be a heck of a lot easier if "A" hadn't cut his brake lines. Spencer realizes that she has to dump Toby for his own safety. Emily's doll has a GPS for her to follow. She ends up on a carbon monoxide-filled barn and has a hallucination (?) involving Alison. Emily comes to and finds that someone dropped off a shovel, which is the suspected murder weapon used in Alison's death.</div>
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The girls meet in the woods and use the shovel to try to dig up the therapist, who they believe is buried alive. Instead, they are caught by the police, covered in dirt and holding that shovel. They are arrested and taken to the police station. Turns out, the therapist was blackmailed by "A" into keeping her mouth shut and leaving town. In the Halloween special, we learned that "A" was messing with Alison way before she was killed. After being arrested, the girls have to do community service and are pretending to shun Emily in order to trick "A" into thinking they are not friends anymore. This plan leads to Hanna getting close enough to "A" to hit "A" with her car. Ah, payback. "A" escapes, but drops his/her cell phone.</div>
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Hanna wants to leave Caleb out of it, but Spencer takes the cell phone to him. They are able to retrieve a photo of "A's" dolls in Spencer's lake house. Spencer goes to her lake house and finds a bunch of "A's" stuff. Toby and Spencer get back together. Jenna leaves town to get an eye operation that might restore her sight. Mona and Noel get back together and then break up again. Meanwhile, Lucas is acting strangely. He calls a teen hotline where Emily is volunteering and says some suspicious things. Hanna ends up on a lake in a rowboat with him, thinks he might be "A," and knocks him out of the boat with an oar. Lucas lives.</div>
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Ezra finally finally finally grows a pair and tells the Montgomerys that he is dating Aria. Byron, Ella, and Mike go nuts. We loved it. Ezra breaks things off with Aria, and Aria keeps calling him trying to get him to change his mind and freaking TRY for their relationship. Then an old friend, <b>Holden</b>, comes back into Aria's life. She uses Holden to fool her parents into thinking she's moving on.</div>
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Holden and Aria pretend to go out on dates, but Aria is secretly meeting Ezra. Holden is doing martial arts when he should be sitting down, because he has a heart condition. Still, he doesn't want his parents' concern for his health to keep him from his love of fighting or whatever. Holden kicks Noel after Noel chases Aria. We have no idea why Noel was chasing Aria. It's possible that he just enjoys being a dick for no reason.</div>
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Maya tells Emily that she had a boyfriend at the religious camp, but he went crazy and started acting like a stalker. Spencer finds out that Garrett checked Jenna out of a school for the blind on the night Alison vanished, but they never checked back in. "A" causes Toby to fall and break his arm, so Spencer breaks up with him again. Upset, Toby leaves town in his truck.</div>
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Jenna dumps Garrett and starts dating Noel Kahn. Yet another video reveals that Garrett, Melissa, Jenna, and Ian were in Ali's bedroom the night she disappeared. Ian taped their meeting because Garrett wanted out of the NAT Club.</div>
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The Liars also find out that Alison was using fake I.D. to pose as a brunette named Vivian Darkbloom. This clue leads Spencer to a claim check. Spencer uses the check to pick up a red raincoat. Caleb is slowly being told everything by Hanna and the other Liars and he hasn't been killed by "A" yet. Interesting. Of course, "A" tries to get him in trouble with the cops, but Spencer and Hanna save him.</div>
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Mona gets Emily back on the swim team, but Emily's troubles aren't over. Maya's parents find more weed and try to send her back to the religious camp. Maya invites Emily to run away with her to San Francisco. Emily isn't crazy, so the two part ways. Sidenote: Maya is our least favorite of Emily's girlfriends. We hated her almost as much as we hate Ezra.</div>
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Back to the evidence/search: In the raincoat, there is a phone number. A man finally answers when the Liars call, and they set up a meeting with him. Turns out, Alison was trying to find "A" and asked this cell phone company employee, <b>Jonah</b>, to help her trace numbers. Jonah found out who was threatening Ali, but Ali died before she could pay him. Jonah now demands money from Spencer in exchange for the answer to the big question. Spencer gets the money from her brother, Jason (she knows he's her brother now and they have an adorable relationship). All of this leads right to Melissa.</div>
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Melissa was working for a law firm years ago, and the texts from "A" were coming from that law firm. Spencer attempts to meet with her sister and have a heart-to-heart, but Melissa gets into a car with Garrett and then lies about it to Spencer, ditching their plans. This causes Spencer to lose it, get drunk, and go to Dr. Wren's place. They have the sexiest scene ever on this show before Wren decides not to take advantage of Spencer's state. For some reason, when Spencer seduces an older man, it's exciting and it doesn't feel like she's getting used. When Aria does it, it's just stupid.</div>
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Mona tells Hanna that "A" has started harassing her too and trying to get her to turn on Hanna. Paige comes out of the closet and starts pursuing Emily romantically. Ella and Byron Montgomery break up because Ella decides to support Aria's decision to date Ezra. Toby and Jenna return to town. Jenna has bandages on her eyes and may or may not be able to see once they come off. Toby ends up back with Spencer. Sad. We wanted her with Wren.</div>
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"A" frames Garrett, invites Jenna to a meeting at Jason's house, knocks Jenna out, and then blows the house up. Hanna and Spencer save Jenna's life. Maya contacts Emily to tell her ex that she is fine, but not to tell her parents. Emily immediately tells Maya's parents, because Emily is a good person.</div>
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Jonah discovers that there was more than one number sending Alison threatening messages. The law firm was only one of them. Jonah suggests the girls investigate another location: a creepy doll hospital. This leads to "A" scaring the pants off the Liars and the viewers, but no actual answers.</div>
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Aria dons Vivian/Ali's raincoat and catches the eye of a new guy, <b>Duncan</b>, who knew "Vivian." He's a pilot who would take Alison up in his airplane where she could feel safe and free from her stalkers. Duncan tells Aria that the Liars are wrong about the timeline of the day Alison died. They thought she returned from the Hilton Head much later than she did. Alison was in Rosewood a good seven hours before the Liars thought she was. This makes the Liars question what Alison was secretly doing in Rosewood on the day she died. Aria then goes back to dealing with Ezra drama. That takes up 90% of Aria's time on this show. She's hardly ever a part of the real action. Probably because she's "A."</div>
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Jenna pretends that her surgery failed, but in reality, she can see. Jenna gives Toby the stolen page of Alison's autopsy report. The page implicates Garrett. When Toby gives the page to the police, Garrett is arrested.</div>
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The girls still suspect Melissa of being "A." "A" continues to do really scary, incredible things with dolls. The Liars find out that Alison had found "A" and followed him/her to a hotel in the middle of the woods. Alison rented the hotel room next to "A's" on the day Alison died. While everyone else is at a school masquerade ball, Spencer and Mona break into "A's" hotel lair. It's the best lair of all time. It's so insane. Google pictures of it. You have to see it.</div>
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Mona finds a picture of a ballgown for the school masquerade ball. It's The Black Swan. Sure enough, there's a black swan at the dance, talking to Jenna and Lucas. Mona leaves Spencer in the lair on the pretense of going to the car to get gum. Mona returns dressed like "A". Black hoodie. Gloves. Mona is "A."</div>
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Mona tries to kill Spencer, but Spencer uses her phone to get the Liars to come help her. Mona is arrested and taken to the loony bin. Turns out, Mona was so obsessed with her best friend, Hanna, that she resented the other Liars for stealing Hanna's time and attention. Experts say that Mona is an insane genius whose "adrenaline spikes keep her in a constant state of hyperreality."</div>
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So is the show over? No. There are multiple "A's" working together. We're not looking for "A." We're looking for "A Team" and "Big A," meaning the person who started it all/the A Team's leader. The season ends with one more twist: Maya is dead and her body is found in Rosewood. Garrett, who made bail earlier, is arrested again on suspicion of killing Maya as well as Alison.</div>
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<b>Season three</b></div>
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Five months later, Hanna is visiting Mona at the institution in order to help her recover, with Dr. Wren's approval. Emily is having a rough time, and she's drinking a lot. The girls have a sleepover where Emily is drugged. She wakes up next to Alison's empty grave. That's right, "A" is at it again. The Liars realize that Mona wasn't working alone. "A" sends them a photo of all the Liars at the empty gravesite and a text saying, "Mona played with dolls. I play with body parts. Game on, bitches." The Liars worry that if "A" releases that photo, they will be charged with stealing Alison's body.</div>
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There's some weird plotline where Byron Montgomery makes Aria apologize to his mistress, who he is seeing again, for being mean to her and trashing Byron's office years ago. It's disgusting and we can't believe Aria apologized. Trash his office again! Ella Montgomery is the new English teacher, and she cheats for Emily so that Emily can pass a test.</div>
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Emily starts to remember bits and pieces about the night she was drugged. She remembers being in a car driven by Jenna. The Liars realize that this means Jenna can see. They confront her, and Jenna begs them to keep it a secret, because she is being threatened.</div>
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Veronica Hastings agrees to represent Garrett in his upcoming trial, and Spencer flips out. Spencer continues to visit Garrett, trying to get information out of him. The Liars break into Melissa's apartment and find out that she was the Black Swan. "A" blackmailed Melissa into attending the party in the costume.</div>
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Melissa had a miscarriage and has been faking her pregnancy ever since Ian's fake suicide. Veronica Hastings is defending Garrett because one of the witnesses in the case would be testifying about Melissa's suspicious behavior. Veronica wants to shut that down. Peter Hastings hired a P.I. to investigate Melissa, because he wants to make sure there is nothing that could cause suspicion to fall on Melissa later. Melissa was sending threatening messages to Alison, who she didn't like, but that doesn't means she's "A."</div>
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Caleb doesn't like that Hanna is visiting Mona, and Hanna won't tell Caleb about the new "A." She wants to protect him, especially after "A" arranges for Caleb's mom to suffer a car accident. Hanna has to lie to Caleb a lot, and he's not happy about that. The two break up, because Hanna won't trust him (for his own good, but still).</div>
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Lucas becomes some sort of emo kid who likes to set things on fire or something. He's all dark. Lucas visits Mona at the institution too. Ashley Marin meets a pastor named <b>Ted</b>, and the two start dating. He's cool so far, and it takes Ashley a while to realize that she's good enough for him.</div>
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Emily receives a necklace made out of human teeth from "A." It's magnificent. Jenna tells Emily that the night Emily was drugged, Jenna found her drunk on the side of the road, drove her a little ways, and then let Emily out of the car after Emily started acting erratically.</div>
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Emily gets a job at a coffee shop and meets Maya's cousin, <b>Nate</b>, and the two become friends. Emily asks Paige out and gives her the flask she was drinking the night she was drugged. Jenna decides to reveal that she can see by throwing herself a big party with a Wonderland theme. We love Jenna so much. Paige ends up working for Jenna, handing out refreshments at the party.</div>
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The flask Emily gave Paige had remains of the alcohol Emily was drinking That Night. Also, roofies. Paige gets drugged and acts a mess at the party. Meanwhile, Lucas is fired as a photographer's assistant and Aria gets the job. Lucas accosts Aria, trying to get something out of his old boss's office. It turns out to be roofies he got from Mona.</div>
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Spencer lurks around the hospital, trying to get to Garrett's sick mother. Spencer believes that Garrett is slipping notes in his mother's bed when he visits her from prison, and the A Team is picking them up. She finds a message with the name "April Rose." This leads Spencer and her brother, Jason, to April Rose Antiques, a creepy shop where they find an old ankle bracelet of Alison's with blood on it.</div>
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They give it to the police, and it exonerates Garrett from Alison's murder. He's still on the hook for Maya (weirdly). "A" texts Spencer with the news that Garrett killed neither Alison nor Maya. Spencer has a breakdown, because she was emotionally dependent on blaming Garrett for all her problems. Jason is having emotional problems too, and Spencer has to save him from getting busted for driving drunk and crashing his car.</div>
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Emily remembers being at a diner That Night She Was Drugged with a boy sporting a rave stamp. Later, the Liars spot Holden with the same stamp on the back of his hand. A cop, <b>Josh</b>, believes that the Liars are criminals working with Garrett. Detective Wilden believes the blood on Alison's ankle bracelet is Hanna's. Veronica gets a court order to prevent Wilden from testing Hanna's blood, a solid for fellow-mother Ashley.</div>
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An older friend of Alison's, <b>CeCe Drake</b>, rolls into town after graduating from UPenn. Hanna gets heat from the DiLaurentis parents who hate her because she called them, thinking she saw Alison, one night when she was still missing. They see this as a cruel practical joke, so they are out for Hanna's blood. Mona gives Aria clues that lead to a website of Mona's, but it's password protected. Of course, Caleb can crack it. It's full of videos Maya made. Maya reads poetry about Emily, blathers, and annoys us, but there is a video of her in the woods, acting scared and then getting grabbed.</div>
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Hanna works with Dr. Wren to keep Mona from being transferred to an institution outside of Rosewood. Following their victory, Hanna and Wren kiss. Byron arranges things so that Ezra loses his Hollis job. Ezra's mother, <b>Diane Fitzgerald</b>, tries to pay Aria to break up with Ezra because Aria had a hand in ruining his teaching career. Ezra's brother, <b>Wesley</b>, arrives and tells Aria that Diane once paid a former girlfriend of Ezra's to get out of his life. Aria meets that girlfriend, <b>Maggie</b>, and Maggie has a young son named <b>Malcolm</b>. Ezra calls Maggie to catch up, but Maggie doesn't tell Ezra about his son, because she doesn't want Diane to revoke the money that is helping their son live well.</div>
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Paige confesses that she kissed Emily the night Emily was drugged, taking advantage of her roofied state. Emily forgives her quickly, the two kiss, and then they spend a lot of time together in the pool, swimming laps to music. Caleb and Hanna get back together, and Caleb is told all about the new "A." The Liars follow the Rave Stamp clue. Maya had that hand stamp at some point as well. It's a stamp that Noel Kahn's older brother (<b>Eric Kahn</b>) puts on everyone's hands when they go to one of his parties. That Night, Emily was at Noel Kahn's cabin, partying and getting drugged.</div>
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The Liars, along with CeCe, attend on of Eric Kahn's parties, where CeCe sleeps with Eric, just because she feels like it. CeCe helps Spencer turn in a late application to UPenn. At the party, Spencer and Jenna have a pretty entertaining showdown that gives us almost no answers. Jenna wants Spencer to turn over the videos the Liars have of her raping Toby. Ella Montgomery starts dating a younger guy, Zach, who owns the coffee shop where Emily works.</div>
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Spencer aggressively stalks Noel for answers. To get her off his back, Noel sends Spencer video footage from his cabin that proves Noel, Garrett, and Jenna were not involved in her abduction. Emily and Hanna go out to Noel's cabin and find a secret room with evidence that someone lived there. They also find Maya's unused ticket to San Francisco. Maya never left town. Someone shuts them in the room, and there is much scariness and violence, but no reveal. Emily gets them out, but Hanna is injured. Dr. Wren patches Hanna up.</div>
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CeCe reveals that Paige and Alison had a rivalry when Alison was alive. Alison, who feared Paige, called Paige the greatest mean high school nickname of all time. "Pigskin." Spencer starts believing that Paige killed Alison and might be "A," using Emily to get to them. Spencer cites the time Paige tried to drown Emily. We were glad someone hadn't forgotten that. Later, while Spencer is in a dressing room, someone puts a poisonous snake in with her. CeCe hears Spencer screaming, runs in, and kills it like she's Uma Thurman on Kill Bill meets The Bounty Hunter, only hunting snakes. Or something. Man, we love CeCe. Emily sticks firmly by Paige even as "A" tries to frame Paige.</div>
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A nervous Caleb acquires a gun. Garrett's trial for the murder of Maya begins, and the media surround Emily's house, trying to talk to the murder victim's former girlfriend. To escape the fracas, Emily goes to a remote cabin with Nate. GREAT IDEA. Once there, Nate reveals that he was the stalker boyfriend Maya met at Jesus Camp, and he hates Emily for stealing Maya away from him. He wants Emily to feel the same pain, so he has Paige/Pigskin tied up in the cabin closet, and he means to stab her in front of Emily. Emily gets out, runs through the woods, and makes it to the top of a lighthouse. Nate gives chase.</div>
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The Liars and Caleb eventually start trying to find Emily. After Spencer gives her v-card to Toby, of course. It's pretty hot. Those abs, man oh man. Emily accidentally stabs Nate while struggling with him in the lighthouse. Caleb finds and comforts Emily. A gunshot goes off. Caleb took his eyes off his gun long enough for Nate to grab it and shoot Caleb. Nate dies; Caleb goes to the hospital and lives. Mona escapes from the insane asylum and is helped by another member of the A Team. This member is revealed to be...Toby. Yeah, we were shocked too.</div>
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On Halloween, one teen dresses up as the corpse of Alison and runs around his own lawn, which the Liars find tasteless and we find hilarious. Garrett, proven innocent and released, promises an explanation of his behavior for Spencer. Garrett tells Spencer that on the night of Alison's murder, Ian, Melissa, Jenna, and Garrett were all in Ali's room (as the video shows), but Garrett and Jenna went downstairs, talking about how much they hate the NAT Club.</div>
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Alison shows up, physically cat fights with Jenna, and gets scared off by Garrett threatening her with a hockey stick. The result of this was that Jenna always thought Garrett killed Alison, but he didn't. Later, Garrett saw Alison arguing with Byron Montgomery. Remember, Alison knew that Byron was cheating on Ella at the time. It's also possible that someone was buried alive that night, because a hand came through a grave at some point in a flashback in the Halloween episode. This show confuses us.</div>
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There is a Halloween party on a train, and everyone in the world attends. Mona is on the train with a Phantom of the Opera mask (which is also Caleb's costume) and an Alison mask underneath that. Mona pretends to be Caleb and gropes Hanna a few times. Then she goes right back to the institution she escaped from. Aria is drugged and shoved into a crate. She turns her head, sees Garrett's dead body, and screams. Yes, "A" finally tormented Aria. We still think she's "A" though. Aria is in danger of being thrown off the train, but she is saved, and Ezra ends up looking suspicious.</div>
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"A" attacks Spencer on the train, and Paige saves her. Friendsies! We also have to tell you that there are weird twin happenings on this show. Alison once told a story about twins while she was babysitting in a flashback. They were twin girls and one was sent away. On the Halloween episode, Pastor Ted and Ashley are visited by some ghostly little blonde girl who was obviously one of the twins in Alison's story. It's clear to nearly everyone that Alison had a twin at some point, and her story and the little girl (who disappears, mysteriously) are meant to be connected in our minds.</div>
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<b>Season three, part two</b></div>
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Mona officially and openly gets out of Radley and goes back to school, attempting to show that she's better now. Jason helps Mona post an apology video on the school website that earns her a cult of sympathy and trust. The Liars are not included in that cult, obviously. Caleb, still angry at Mona for trying to hurt Hanna, puts a cow's brain in her locker. Lucas tells Hanna that Mona has been sneaking out of Radley for a while. The school has a new janitor who Emily recognizes as the desk clerk from the motel in which A rented a room. The Liars go into the janitor's office and find Ali's diary, which proves that Ali was trying to blackmail Aria's dad. Aria rips out that particular page and they put the diary back. The school holds a fundraiser where Meredith, Byron's mistress, is injured.</div>
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It looks like Jason is the person who attacked Aria on Halloween. Lucas tells Hanna that he was only temporarily on the A team because Mona made him distract everyone so that she could grab Spencer back at the masquerade ball. After that, he smuggled messages from Mona in Radley to Jason. Mona knows that he used to sell test answers and blackmailed him into doing her will, but after an A-team member tries to run over him with a car, Lucas is done playing Mona's games. Mona wins the position as decathlon captain over Spencer and Hanna turns on Mona because of it. </div>
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Aria gets drugged and attacked by a crazy Meredith, but she's saved by her father. Aria confronts Byron. Byron levels with her. He did not kill Ali. Spencer finds out that Toby is on the A-Team. Spencer is tricked by A into telling Ezra that he has a son. Ezra goes to Delaware to meet Malcolm for the first time and tells Aria not to call him during that time. While Ezra is gone, Aria spends a lot of friendly time with his brother, Wes. Wes kisses Aria.</div>
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The Liars see a conversation between Ali and CeCe in Ali's biology notebook where Ali mentions a beach hottie. CeCe tells the Liars that she never found out the identity of the beach hottie Ali was seeing. But CeCe also says that Ali had a pregnancy scare that summer. Emily sees a picture of Wilden that leads her to believe he was "beach hottie." Jason and Emily get ahold of the picture, but when an elevator Jason is riding plummets to the ground, he ends up in the hospital and the picture is stolen. Shortly afterward, Jason disappears too. </div>
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Emily's memories of her lost night return and she recalls seeing blonde in a red coat. Emily concludes that this is the main A. Meanwhile, Spencer goes into a downward spiral. She gets to a sad, insane place. She's kicked off the decathlon team entirely and spends a lot of time investigating Toby. Spencer goes out with Wren (yay!), but the relationship is a nonstarter at this point, and they are seen kissing by Red Coat. Soon after, A traps Spencer in the Hasting's family steamer, and it's seriously scary.</div>
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Hanna goes to meet Caleb's uncle and quickly figures out that Uncle Jamie is actually Caleb's biological father. Hanna goes about repairing their relationship with each other and revealing the truth to Caleb. All goes well until she suspects Uncle Jamie of stealing from the local church. She's wrong and he was framed by A, but she ends up ruining the fledgling relationship between Caleb and his dad.</div>
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CeCe leaves Rosewood (sad), but, before going, she tells the Liars that Melissa stole the Wilden picture. After Wilden threatens Hanna and Ashley, Ashley runs over him with her car. His body goes missing, but the Marins are caught on Wilden's car camera. Hanna and Aria push the car into a lake to hide the footage and the crime. Sadly, Wilden reappears, acting like nothing happened. Later, he goes up to Hanna and threatens her, telling her that all he wants is his car back. Oops.</div>
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Spencer finally tells her friends that Toby is on the A-Team. Emily and Hanna find a Radley parking pass with the name "E. Lamb" in Toby's apartment. Spencer follows Mona into the woods and Mona leads her to a dead body that Spencer believes is Toby. After suffering a night of exposure and trauma, Spencer is found in a catatonic state and is taken to Radley. There, Spencer makes friends with a male nurse named E. Lamb. Lamb tells Spencer that Radley has recently had a hard time keeping control of visitor's passes and I.D.s. </div>
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Ezra returns with Maggie and Malcom in tow. They are moving to Rosewood to be closer to him. Ezra wants to teach at Rosewood High again, so Aria lies to the principal about the nature of their relationship. Back to square one. Mona visits an increasingly crazy Spencer and offers her a spot on the A-Team. Spencer accepts, but only to gather more information. Spencer's first assignment is to kidnap Malcolm and then return him. This episode greatly worries Aria. She tries to break up with Ezra, but he doesn't let her.</div>
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Spencer gets out of Radley just as her friends figure out that she kidnapped Malcolm. Spencer finds out that Toby is alive and that the body was someone else's. Toby and Spencer make up. They both joined the A-Team with good intentions: to protect each other. Emily catches Jenna, Shana (a lesbian who works in the local costume shop and who is trying to break up Emily and Paige), and Melissa conspiring at Jenna's house.</div>
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Mona, Toby, and Spencer have no idea who red coat is. Red Coat traps Mona and the Liars in a lodge and sets it on fire. Toby is attacked and knocked unconscious. The attacker plants a lighter in his hand, trying to frame him. Red Coat pulls the Liars and Mona out of the fire. Hanna wakes to see that it's Ali. Spencer and Mona also see Alison. On the way back into town, the Liars see Wilden's car parked in front of the church. The video of Ashley running him over is playing, and the footage also reveals Jenna and Shana dragging Wilden's body away. The five girls open the trunk and gasp when they see what's inside.</div>
Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-902766175139636412013-06-01T09:07:00.004-07:002013-06-01T09:07:49.783-07:00Arrested Development Season 4, Episode 7 recap/review in chronological order<div class="p1">
<b>Colony Collapse-</b> Gob</div>
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Finally finally finally the Gob episode. We knew his episode would be the funniest, but what we didn't know is that all the episodes after this one would be good too. We are through the long night of the "meh" and ready for actual Arrested Development to start.</div>
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At the end of the season three finale, Gob is dating Ann, George Michael's ex girlfriend. Ann is less than an hour away from turning 18. </div>
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<a name='more'></a>When George Michael finds out, he punches Gob, and Ann tells Gob that he has to make it right with his nephew before she will sleep with him. Gob does…sort of.<br />
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Gob then realizes that there is nothing standing in the way of him having a committed, loving relationship with Ann. This freaks him out. In fact, upon this realization, Simon and Garfunkel's "The Sound of Silence" starts playing. "Hello Darkness, my old friend…." </div>
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Gob breaks into Ann's house that night in order to break up with her, but before he can, Ann unzips her pajamas. This reminds Gob of past situations where he was aroused and the two make love in her bed, right in front of her Jesus painting.</div>
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Afterward, Gob is wearing her zip-up PJs, and Ann is wearing his shirt. He looks ridiculous; she looks pretty good. Gob still can't bring himself to break up with Ann.</div>
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Gob jokingly says, "marry me," and Ann takes it literally. Ann screams in joy and her entire family comes out of their rooms (Alan Tudyk!) to celebrate. </div>
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As they envelop him in love, The Sound of Silence plays again. Gob says, "I've made a huge mistake."</div>
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Gob tells his own family the "good" news and gets almost no reaction. Meanwhile, Tony Wonder (Ben Stiller), Gob's old rival, has come out of the closet and is making bank with his "gay magician act." </div>
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Gob appears on Ann's father's religious talk show, And As It Is Such, So Also As Such Is It Unto You, where Gob pronounces that he wants his wedding to appear on the show. Gob announces (in the most sacrilegious way possible) that, at his wedding, he will be performing an illusion. Oy.</div>
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Gob asks Michael to be his best man. Slash assistant. Michael refuses this offer because he's just announced that he's out of the family again. Gob missed the announcement because he was depressed and zoning out and Sounds of Silence was playing in his head again. </div>
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Gob tells Michael that he already has the bees for his bee company that he's started. That'll come up later. It already has in the last episode.</div>
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On the day of Gob's wedding, Gob has set up a trick where he goes into a tomb like Jesus, but he really sneaks out and hides in a boulder prop and makes his escape. Gob is sad to see that none of his family members showed up for the wedding. </div>
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Then he sees that Tobias is there and is gladdened until he realizes that Tobias only came in order to play Roman Centurion Number Two. The church is called Holy Eternal Rapture (HER), so above the wedding party, it looks like the lettering says, "Her?" This is an old Ann joke from seasons past. </div>
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Gob's trick sequence is hilarious. It features him up on a glittery cross saying that Jesus rising from the dead wasn't a trick. "It was an illusion." Oh, Lord. </div>
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On the back of the cross, it says, "Love Each Other," which is Gob's catchphrase for his "Christian Magician" persona. Of course, The Final Countdown is played. Gob announces that he will stay entombed for two weeks.</div>
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Gob goes into the tomb, handcuffed, but is unable to open the secret compartment that contains the handcuff key. He is unable to break his fall into the boulder prop and is knocked unconscious before the boulder is wheeled away by assistants.</div>
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Ann realizes that Gob isn't coming back in two weeks and has ditched her. She takes it well. We are definitely Ann fans. It's nice to see her back. She's seriously pretty these days too! Especially on Parenthood.</div>
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Gob remains stuck in the boulder in the church parking lot and is shipped to a storage unit. This is why Gob misses Lucille's hearing.</div>
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In two weeks, the tomb is opened and Gob is not there. He left a note that says, "If I have not returned, I am in the rapture. Love each other."</div>
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Gob is finally discovered in an episode of the reality TV program "Locker Hawkers." The show labels him "Feral Jesus."</div>
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Ann visits Gob in the hospital and tells him that she sold his cave on Craigslist. Gob tries to rekindle the commitment, for some reason, but Ann breaks up with him and leaves him a religious tract. The tract gets through to Gob.</div>
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Gob calls Steve Holt to reconnect and asks his son to meet him at a bar. At the bar, Gob is talking to a funny stranger when he realizes that this is an almost unrecognizable, aged Steve Holt.</div>
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Steve offers his father a job in pest control so that they can have a father/son business. Gob pretends he is coming.</div>
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Gob stays at the bar late, showing off his magic. He gets the attention of a teen pop star, Mark Cherry, and his entourage, as well as Rebel Alley.</div>
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When the paparazzi shows up, Mark Cherry flips because he knows he'll be in trouble with his handlers if the photographers get a drunk picture. Gob says, "Getting away is kind of my specialty."</div>
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Gob throws lighter fluid in the paparazzi's eyes and drives Mark and his entourage out of there in Mark's limo. Gob is accepted into the group. Mostly as a driver. They call him Getaway.</div>
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Gob and the entourage spend the next few weeks partying and then waking up with deep shame. But Gob has a trick for dealing with shame: his roofies.</div>
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Unfortunately, taking his "forget me nows" makes Gob forget that he took them, so he gets into this Memento-type memory spiral that keeps him roofed most of the time, but unable to actually forget the shameful event he wanted to erase in the first place.</div>
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Gob ends up in a Mexican hospital with stage four syphilis, and he wears out his welcome with Mark Cherry and the boys. Mark writes a song about Gob that goes, "Go away, go away, get away, Getaway. Stay Away, stay Away." </div>
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Gob knows this song and sings it often, but he doesn't get the subtle hint to leave. It's a really catchy song and we want a full version on our iPods, stat.</div>
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Gob puts his sick bees in the trunk of the limo, and takes the gang to pick up some women (including DeBrie). The bees end up stinging everyone except for Gob who put up the driver partition. </div>
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They end up at rock bottom, drunk, sick, and covered in bee stings and are taken away in ambulances. Gob notices none of this.</div>
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The next day, Gob shows up at the Opies, an awards show where Mark Cherry is being honored. Tony Wonder is also there. Just as Gob notices this, Maeby runs by with a trophy.</div>
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Gob wedges a panel shut so that Tony Wonder can't escape from the podium. Then he calls Mark Cherry so that his friends can come laugh at Tony Wonder's imminent failure. He finds out that Mark Cherry checked into rehab.</div>
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Gob says, "A little alcohol poisoning never killed anyone." He finds out that Mark Cherry isn't really his friend and then Tony Wonder pops out of a speaker, not the podium. Then there's an explosion.</div>
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In that pivotal moment, Gob realizes that he lost a fiancee, his career, his family, and his entourage. Gob says, "I have no one in my life who cares for me." And The Sound of Silence plays again. "Hello Darkness, my old friend…"</div>
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Gob's phone rings. His ring tone is the Mark Cherry Getaway song. It's Steve Holt. Gob says, "Great, and now my boss is on my ass."</div>
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Lucille calls Gob, who still has the limo, to offer him the desert job to prepare to be company president. He goes to the desert, the bees escape, and Gob realizes that the sauna cave his father has been using is the same cave he used in his Christian magician's escape.</div>
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Gob finds a small, metallic "t" in the secret compartment that had wedged it shut, ruining Gob's trick. Gob thinks the "t" stands for Tony Wonder and that he was sabotaged by his rival. It's obviously a small cross.</div>
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<b>Episode grade: A</b></div>
Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-70720834300233857512013-06-01T07:43:00.000-07:002013-06-01T07:43:09.774-07:00Arrested Development season 4, episode 6 recap/review<div class="p1" style="color: #444444; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13.63636302947998px; line-height: 17.27272605895996px;">
<b>Double Crossers</b>- George Sr. Noooooooooo.</div>
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As we go through the last lame episode of this season, we shake our heads wondering how the writers, directors, and producers didn't know how hard the beginning would be for people to get through. The cast split up; the jokes still being set up, two George Sr. episodes and two Michael ones! Zzzzz.</div>
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But we're almost through the fog and into the episodes that feel like this show, albeit a really dark version of this show. We actually like the darkness. Hello darkness, my old friend. But we're getting ahead of ourselves.</div>
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<a name='more'></a>George Sr. is at a political fundraiser for extreme conservative Herbert Love in order to get support for the wall. Herbert isn't receptive at first, but he says he'd be willing to consider the wall if George Sr. gets him a red head and some money.<br />
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Oscar is having pillow talk with Lucille when Lucille suggest that they send Gob down to the wall building site to teach him the family business. He needs a job and some work ethic. Lucille wants him to sweat.</div>
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Back at the fundraiser, George Sr. is unsuccessfully pumping his spiritual retreat so that he can earn money to donate to Herbert Love. The man he is talking to says, "Didn't someone die at that thing?" </div>
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George Sr. gives up, but then he runs into Lindsay wearing a cheap red wig. She still looks awesome in it. </div>
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He asks his daughter if she has any money, and Lindsay mentions that she has a $50,000 check that Lucille sent Maeby for plastic surgery. George Sr. makes a joke about Lindsay's nose job, but it's still unclear whether Portia has had one. Ugh!</div>
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George Sr. takes the check, telling Lindsay that he's going to deposit it in a trust fund for her daughter. Really though, he signs it over to Herbert Love.</div>
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Herbert Love announces his support for a wall on TV and George Sr. drives back to his desert colony. There are already government surveyors on the land.</div>
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They tell him that the millions of dollars of American property he owned was worthless because it's actually in Mexico. Oscar and his friends didn't know where the line was between the countries. Also, Barry didn't catch it because all the paperwork was in Spanish. Doh!</div>
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Gob drives up to the colony. YESSSSS. He's ready to work so that he can be prepared to be president of the company, if he's ever needed.</div>
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Gob is driving a limo, and in the back, he has a car full of bees. He's a bee farmer now. Of course, George, Sr. opens the door and gets stung. His entire colony is filled with bees. </div>
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Oscar arrives in the panic and tells George Sr. that he was going off Buster's map when he said the property was in America. Oscar leaves to take over George Sr.'s life, and George Sr. follows in order to prevent that.</div>
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George Sr. calls Lucille and finds out that Oscar already slept with her. He goes to Dr. Norman, because he's been having problems getting an erection. It's definitely the stress and the maca. Dr. Norman is a hack who doesn't figure it out. </div>
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The both end up thinking it's the work of the ostrich shaman he saw. We're not loving the connection the show draws between weakness and being a woman. We kind of like the way the show makes fun of women hating the way they look by having George Sr. suddenly become self-conscious. But we kind of hate it too, you dig?</div>
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Dr. Norman accidentally sends George Sr. to Michael's office (Orange County Imagine), getting it confused with Orange County Imaging, a place where George Sr. could actually get an MRI. George Sr. sees Michael and pretends he came to make up with him. He gives Michael the Mexican porn he brought to help with his own erection problem.</div>
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We find out that Oscar was the one who turned down the movie and refused to sign the release. He is also the one boning Lucille 2. </div>
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George Sr. says he will sign the release if Michael gets Herbert Love against the wall. George Sr. knows the family will go broke if they have to build the wall for the government, but he doesn't have enough money to get Herbert Love to flip flop. Michael agrees to talk to Herbert Love at Love's Cinco De Cuatro speech.</div>
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George Sr. goes to Lucille and tells her the bad news. Lucille tells George Sr. that it will ruin the family if they DON'T build the wall. She tells him to get just enough built to trigger the government repayment. Then she tells George Sr. to get Herbert Love to come out against the wall, leaving a partial wall and a full payment to the Bluths.</div>
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At his father's behest, Michael puts Gob in charge of Sudden Valley and the two reunite. Gob has been spending his time performing a Christian magic act that Christians don't care for.</div>
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Michael rubs his new producer life in Gob's face at first, but the two share and bond over Mike's Hard Lemonade later. Meanwhile, George Sr. finds a way to trick the government into thinking he's built miles of wall already.</div>
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Two weeks later at Cinco, George Sr. hopes to hear Herbert Love sway public opinion against the wall. He runs into a drunk Michael with a black eye. Then he runs into Lucille, who is upset that he gave money to Herbert Love and is using her company to build a wall she's running against.</div>
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Then, George Sr. goes to Dr. Norman for a check up and finds out that he has almost no testosterone in his system at all, but he's full of estrogen. When it comes time for Hebert Love to make his speech, the party is suddenly ransacked by Hispanic people who apparently don't like the holiday anymore. </div>
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The Herbert Love crowd starts chanting, "Put up this wall," and George Sr. looks for a disguise. He finds a red, chenille wig in the garbage and puts it on. He likes it. He hides out in the Bluth apartment. The next day, a cop visits him with the news that Lucille 2 has gone missing. He's pretending to be a woman now. God, we could have done without that whole thing, right?</div>
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<b>Episode grade: C</b></div>
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Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-60670860415991828052013-06-01T07:42:00.003-07:002013-06-01T07:42:24.554-07:00Best almost news of the week<div style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13.63636302947998px; line-height: 17.27272605895996px;">
Dan Harmon is in talks to come back to Community.</div>
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That would be amazing. We would both start watching it again (only one of us is watching it now). The show was so much better when he ran it, jerk or not.</div>
Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-71916971235870124672013-05-31T08:22:00.000-07:002013-05-31T08:22:03.751-07:00The Fall- Season 1<div class="p1">
A BBC show, The Fall, has come to America on Netflix. There is one season and it consists of five episodes. It stars Gillian Anderson, Archie Panjabi, and Jamie Dornan. This show was renewed for a second season on May 27, 2013. It will start production at the beginning of next year. As fans of a few BBC shows, we're used to long waits.</div>
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The Fall is about Detective Stella Gibson, a woman who specializes in the psychology of killers. She is brought in to hunt a man named Paul Spector who is pretending to be a loving family man while killing women in Belfast. </div>
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First, the bad news:</div>
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<li>The ending of the season is so unsatisfying! The last episode is very good, but we can't believe we have to wait probably more than a year to see it. That's an awfully long wait for a story like this. </li>
<li>The show has kind of a slow start. Two hour-long episodes in, we almost quit watching and didn't love it.</li>
<li>The pacing can be off. We think the amount of actual plot they had could have been stuffed into three or four episodes, or even a movie with a frustrating "to be continued" at the end.</li>
<li>There's a B-plot featuring corruption that we didn't give two hoots about.</li>
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The good news:</div>
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<li>It's well-written and beautifully shot most of the time.</li>
<li>Gillian Anderson. Not only is she great in this, but she's absolutely stunning.</li>
<li>Sheriff Graham from Once Upon a Time is getting work. Sure, it's as a serial killer, so we can't swoon over his hotness properly, but we'll take what we can get. </li>
<li>The feminism. Holy crap is it good on this show. Stella calls out misogynists when it's appropriate and bites her tongue when she knows it won't be properly received. She's pretty bad ass too.</li>
<li>It's set in Ireland, so everyone has an adorable accent. There are little kids in it too, and they have adorable accents. It's like double the adorable.</li>
<li>There's a scene in the finale that's (sort of) between Stella and the killer, and it's electric. You won't be able to take your eyes off of it.</li>
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Our recommendation is that you catch up on other shows for now, but get into this right before the start of the second season. You don't want to be stuck waiting like we are. It's not worth jumping into just five episodes only to have to wait for freaking ever for the story to be picked up. But check it out when season two is up.</div>
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<b>Show grade: B</b></div>
Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-44542850548083256612013-05-31T08:11:00.000-07:002013-05-31T08:11:23.534-07:00Arrested Development Season 4, episode 5 recap/review in chronological order<div class="p1">
<b>A New Start- </b>Tobias's first episode. </div>
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Ah! Just what the show needed right? A Tobias episode? Well, it's definitely an improvement over focusing on Michael, Lindsay, and George Sr., but it didn't meet our high expectations for a Tobias episode. </div>
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At the end of the season three finale, Lindsay is breaking up with Tobias and tells him that he is gay. Tobias is surprised to hear that people think this, and Lindsay assures him that this is a running joke in the family because of the misleading way in which Tobias speaks. The constant gay Freudian slips.<br />
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We love that this show doesn't make fun of Tobias for being gay, but rather for being in denial that he's gay.</div>
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<a name='more'></a>After kissing his wife goodbye (awkwardly, on the shoulder), Tobias contemplates his life sitting next to a very depressed looking Gob. Either Will Arnett is a great actor, or Amy Poehler really did a number on him.<br />
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Tobias decides to seek his life's purpose and, like Lindsay, reads Eat, Pray, Love. We prefer the South Park version, Eat, Pray, Queef.</div>
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Like the writer of Eat, Pray, Love (and Lindsay), Tobias books a flight to India. He puts on a literal sheet over his cut-offs, as a sari. It's so sad. </div>
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He sets out on "a new start" and gets a license place that says "ANUSTART." We would give anything to have that license plate now. Of course, he passes Lindsay's cab while they both drive to the airport. They are on the same plane, and Tobias is the passenger sitting behind Lindsay who annoys her, but they never find out. </div>
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Since Lindsay and Tobias have identical suitcases, Tobias was the one who took her suitcase at the airport. He was also the tourist who got grazed by the bus Lindsay rode to her hotel. </div>
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In the hospital, the doctors laugh at him and suggest he become a comedy actor. After spending two weeks in the hospital, Tobias flies home. Later, he gets a call from Lindsay telling him that she wants to give the marriage another go.</div>
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At a family gathering, Lindsay and Tobias announce that they are back together. Tobias hires his real estate agent (Ed Helms) as his acting agent. Tobias's former agent works for Allstate. Ed Helms is tasked with firing him. Tobias sneaks onto film sets to hand out head shots.</div>
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At Thanksgiving, the Funke family unveils their duck, but it didn't even die in the oven. Its feathers are a little blackened. The Funkes take the duck to the local China Garden and have it cooked there.</div>
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After his real estate/acting agent dies, Tobias takes Lindsay to the methadone clinic that he thinks is an acting class. There, Tobias recognizes the junkie DeBrie as the actress who played Sue Storm 20 years ago in a rushed, low-budget version of the Fantastic Four produced by Imagine Entertainment. </div>
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Tobias also recognizes her from gay porn that's in denial about being gay porn. The entire time DeBrie is whacked out on methadone, Tobias thinks that she is acting and experimenting with improv, so he loves her.</div>
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In the bathroom of the Swappigans restaurant, DeBrie encourages Tobias to continue acting and to write scripts. Tobias kisses her. She says, "Maybe with someone like you, I can have a new start." Tobias thinks her saying that means they are meant to be together.</div>
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DeBrie passes out and her heart stops. Tobias takes her to the hospital, where she is called a butter face and revived. Unaware that Lindsay has already run off with Marky Bark, Tobias calls Lindsay and leaves a message saying that he's leaving her. </div>
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Because Tobias is in the hospital with DeBrie, he misses Lucille's hearing. DeBrie tests positive for several STDs (STDs/VDs for those of you who are behind the terminology times…why do they keep changing them?) </div>
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The doctor advises DeBrie to tackle her drug problem, to which Tobias replies, "You didn't tell me you have a drug problem!" Tobias, now clued into what he's been missing, concludes that DeBrie's drug use is a consequence of her abandoning her acting dreams.</div>
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Tobias decides that they should cash in on DeBrie's Fantastic Four "fame." They stand on the street with DeBrie dressed as Sue Storm and offer to take pictures with tourists. </div>
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When people want pictures of, you know, Jessica Alba as Sue Storm, DeBrie suggests she use her law degree to get a job. HA. Fat chance, in this economy with all the law competition. She's better of being an actress.</div>
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Tobias tells DeBrie not to settle, so the doctor and lawyer continue to stand on the street hoping someone will give them ten bucks for a picture. Tobias buys a costume so that he can be The Thing and draw more customers. He first tries to be "Johnny The Human Flamer" though.</div>
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DeBrie and Tobias are finally recognized for as their characters and are arrested for copyright violation. Tobias goes back to the abandoned Bluth apartment to ransack it, because he and his new lady love are broke. He finds it already ransacked.</div>
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Tobias hears what he thinks is two ostriches making love to a pop hit. But it's actually Lucille 2 being attacked by an ostrich in heat while a pop hit plays in the background. The lyrics are "Go away go away. Get away, Getaway. Stay away Getaway." This is funny later.</div>
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Tobias carries Lucille 2 to the hospital. He saved her from the ostrich before it had gotten through her second layer of makeup and actually damaged her skin. Tobias is proud of himself for acting like an actual superhero.</div>
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To think him for saving her, Lucille 2 offers Tobias a job as a real therapist in the rehab center she owns, Austerity. Tobias turns down the job, even though it pays $120,00 a year to start. DeBrie is disappointed. </div>
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DeBrie runs away crying, saying that Marky couldn't see her, but Tobias couldn't hear her. Hurt that he wouldn't take a good job after she almost sold her body for a hamburger, DeBrie goes back to her old partying ways.</div>
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She is soon picked up by a limo where she will be passed around between Hollywood creeps. If you listen closely, you will hear Gob's voice coming from the limo. We want a Gob episode by this point so badly that we ached when we heard that voice. Of course we recognized it when we first saw this episode! It's Gob!</div>
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Tobias waits for DeBrie for three weeks, wandering around, sadly, in his costume before deciding to find his daughter. Five years have passed since Lucille's first arrest. </div>
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Tobias drives up to the model home, which has been rented out to the crew of "John Beard's To Entrap a Local Predator: Supercreeps." The camera crew sees Tobias's license plate and one man says, "Looks like we got ourselves an anus tart!" </div>
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Tobias is wearing his Fantastic Four costume (The Thing), and he is on his way to reconnect with Maeby. He gives her a phone call and identifies himself as "Big Daddy." </div>
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He walks into the house and yells, "Is there a little girl here all by herself? Daddy needs to get his rocks off!" He is wearing shorts around the outside of his costume, by the way. Tobias is arrested as a sex predator, confused the entire time.</div>
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It's always funny how clueless Tobias is, but the only funny thing about this episode was the To Catch a Predator parody. The DeBrie stuff was a little dull and long-running, at least in this episode. </div>
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If this episode had been 20 minutes rather than 30, it would have been better.</div>
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<b>Episode grade: B-</b></div>
Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-29363237001297286502013-05-31T07:34:00.002-07:002013-05-31T07:34:09.860-07:00Hannibal has been renewed for a second seasonYay! That's deserved. We have to get caught up.Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-228678769273144852.post-2724057614845516662013-05-30T07:28:00.002-07:002013-05-30T07:28:27.844-07:00Arrested Development Season 4, Episode 4 recap/review<div class="p1">
<b>The B. Team</b>- Focal character: Michael Bluth</div>
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At this point in the season, this episode needed to be a slam-dunk. Enough was enough. We'd had two "meh" episodes in a row, preceded by a "pretty good" one. Sadly, this one was "meh" and really dragged the show down, making some lose hope for this comeback.</div>
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If they had put the Gob episode here instead of a Michael one, it would have saved the first half of the season. We didn't like what this episode did with the movie industry and Ron Howard plot lines. We thought those plot lines were going to keep being boring and drag down the entire season. Thank God they turned out better than they started off.</div>
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<a name='more'></a>After Lucille goes to prison and Michael moves out of the dorm, Michael starts working for Google and drives their camera car. Barry calls Michael with the news that Ron Howard wants to meet with him. Barry is being prosecuted for breaking into a school, but Bob Loblaw is on the job. Barry is still found guilty and booked though.<br />
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Michael heads to Imagine Entertainment, Ron Howard's company, where he sees Kitty, who works there. Kitty does not show Michael her boobs and is offended that he thinks she will. Oh, Kitty. Maeby hired her back in the day. </div>
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We're glad this season used Kitty sparingly. We love the actress, but the character should come in small doses.</div>
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Michael meets with Ron Howard, who has just finished a casting call for and Andy Griffith show remake. The two talk inside a model shuttle from Apollo 13.</div>
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Ron Howard wants to make a movie about the Bluth family's recent troubles, but he wants Michael's wife to in it, dying. Ron suggests his girl, Rebel Alley, for the part. Michael assumes this means that Rebel is his mistress, but Ron was actually talking about his illegitimate daughter. We love how Ron Howard pokes fun at himself and the rumors surrounding him in this show.</div>
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Ron Howard tells Michael that he needs to get all of his family members to sign releases in order to make the movie, because it's about all of them. But the heart of the movie will be the father/son relationship. Ron has had cards made up for Michael that say "Co-Associate Producer" on them. Michael likes this.</div>
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Outside, Michael has doubts about the movie. Then, Michael has a meet-cute with a pretty red head (Isla Fisher). They literally run into each other and like each other right away, but they don't get each other's names. Michael tells her that he's a movie producer looking to cast a "wife." She tells him that she's in a band and invites him to a club to see her play.</div>
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In order to charm the new redhead, Michael feels that he needs to be a real producer and cast her in his movie. Instead of, you know, just asking her out. So he needs the signatures. He goes to find his father and sees George Sr. canoodling in secret with Lucille 2.</div>
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George Sr. refuses to sign the release, because Michael can't promise that his father will be positively portrayed. Michael calls Carl Weathers, because Call made a George Bluth Sr. episode of a crime-reenactment series, and Michael thought Carl might have the rights to George Sr.'s story. Of course, Carl didn't get the rights, but Michael keeps him around as part of his dream team.</div>
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Michael remembers that he knows a Writers Guild member, Warden Gentles. He also gets Andy Richter onboard. He takes his dream team back to Ron Howard to pitch the movie….without getting releases signed. Ron Howard isn't into it because he wants to cast everyone himself. Ron tells Michael to go get the signatures and gives him an office in Orange County so that he can be closer to his family.</div>
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George Sr. goes to Michael's office to speak to him and give him a peace offering of Mexican porn. They go to get coffee. Once George Sr. realizes that Michael wants to make the movie to fool a hot girl into thinking Michael is a producer, George Sr. signs the release. </div>
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Michael goes to the club where the redhead is playing. Outside, he meets Ron Howard and tells him the good news that he has George Sr.'s signature. Ron tells Michael that the father/son relationship he is interested in is between Michael and George Michael. This worries Michael, since George Michael values his privacy.</div>
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Michael watches the redhead play in her band, and the show gives us its one good line of this episode: "And like all bagpipe music, it was hard to tell if it was good music played horrible or horrible music played well.</div>
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After her set, Michael takes her out for drinks. There's a good nod to Rita in the conversation. The redhead reveals that she has a son. Michael says he has one too, but he lies about George Michael's age so that he wouldn't seem old and clingy. Michael and the redhead have sex in a photo booth at the restaurant.</div>
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The redhead gives Michael the strip of photos from the booth, and he finally finds out her name: Rebel. Michael is shocked to be dating Ron Howard's mistress. Conan O'Brien guest stars as himself in this episode and is also a good sport making fun of himself.</div>
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This episode was the least funny. It set up a lot of good things and wasn't hard to understand like the George Sr. episode, but it was "meh." By now, we were in desperate need of the Gob episode that we still had to watch to episodes in order to get to. </div>
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<b>Episode grade: C-</b></div>
Ern and Leeardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02222918254913939721noreply@blogger.com0