A Few Comments on This Week's TV

How I Met Your Mother - The Exploding Meatball Sub
Both of us thought this episode was a little “meh” and not funny, although ern really liked that Marshall finally quit his job at GNB. She also liked the meatball sub stuff.

Episode Grade: C+

The United States of Tara - The Full F You Finger
It was ok. The Adventures of Kate are boring us. Get back to Tara.

Episode Grade: C+

Body of Proof - Talking Heads
We are starting to bemoan the lack of chemistry in the cast and the predictability in the episodes, but we are still watching. Leeard thinks it’s like Bones, only stupider and without Booth. Liked the corny ending though. We’re suckers for mother/daughter stuff.

Episode Grade: C

Modern Family - The Musical Man
Very funny, even though the plot where it looked like Phil was pimping out his family was a little too dumb, even for Phil. Then she show actually pulled off a touching moment with Jay’s brother! We missed this show.

Episode Grade: B+

America’s Next Top Model - Lana Marks
We were a little shocked that Jaclyn went home so early. She takes great pictures. True, she looks the least like a model and she runs the least amount of drama in the house. We think it should have been Hannah or Molly. Molly has had a horrible attitude from day one. We are still rooting for enemies Brittani and Alexandria.

Episode Grade: A-

American Idol
As it stands, Leeard is rooting for Casey. Ern has favored Haley for a while. Even before "Bennie and the Jets". But feel free to hop on this bandwagon. Haley has a fantastic voice. Leeard was sad to lose Paul. Ern was ecstatic. He was the worst. Now, we just have to get rid of Jacob Lusk, a singer neither of us like. When we agree on American Idol, it’s rare. That’s how bad Jacob is. Week grade: A

The Office - Training Day
A show that mostly isn't funny anymore + a comedian who mostly isn’t funny anymore? You know how this turned out. We have only liked Will F in Anchorman. Elf had a funny script, but Will didn’t add much to it and came across as a creeper. Neither of us cared for him in The Office. Someone breathe new life in this show, fast. Funniest part of the episode? The turtle part. Episode Grade: C

The Vampire Diaries - The Last Dance
This show can do no wrong. It is so much better than any teen show has any right to be. The pacing, the twists, the characters, the hot guys, the lack of stupidity, the health of the relationships, and the moxie of the main girl? Pitch perfect, and this week is no exception. Episode grade: A

Bones - The Truth in the Myth
Too predictable, pretty forgettable. And stupid, because the chupacabra is obviously real.
Episode grade: C

Mike and Molly - Opening Day
We liked the bonding between Molly and Carl, but she shouldn't have gone to the baseball game with them.

Episode Grade: B-

The Chicago Code - Wild Onions
It’s awesome. One day the blogger who loves this show will explain why it’s awesome, but until then, accept it.

Episode Grade: A-

Better with You - Better Without a Job
The stupid plot with the book/Maddie is dumb for the whole pretending-to-not-be-fired thing.

Episode Grade: C

30 Rock - I Heart Connecticut
Truly, truly unspecial episode. No laughs, lame plots. At least we’ve got crazy Tracy back for next time though, right?

Episode Grade: D+

Community - Competitive Wine Tasting
We didn’t love Trey’s subplot, but we loved someone calling Jeff out for being a douche. And did Pierce really find the right one? Fiddla please.

Episode grade: B

Parks and Recreation - Andy and April’s Fancy Party
We want Ben to get Leslie. At least for a little while. They set it up so subtly that it felt like the audience’s idea. Until this episode, where it was obvious. Brilliant. Plus, April and Andy got married!

Episode Grade: A-

Fringe - Lysergic Acid Diethylamide
That reminded us of Inception. Only with more character development. The cartoon thing was cute, but Olivia’s looked nothing like her. Very strange, but we liked this one. Oh, this show. Episode grade: A-

Chaos - Love and Rockets
Par for the course for this show, which equals an episode grade of B-

Camelot - Lady of the Lake recap

If you haven't seen this show and wonder what it's like, this is the recap for you.

Previously, on Camelot: A weak boy with a rat face covered in peach fuzz became King Arthur. He slept with his brother’s girlfriend. One of his men, Leontes, saved his life. So he slept with Leontes’ fiancé the day before the wedding. Some of his men forced great warrior Gawain, who was hiding out, to come help the new king. Arthur’s half-sister, Morgan, was better than him, if a little melodramatic. The hack playing Merlin whispered, even when the person he was talking to was all the way on the other side of the room.

The episode begins with super-serious credits, a choir boy serenading us, and foggy images warning us that this is a legendary legend of legendness. The music speeds up and a half naked woman touches her neck. This warns us that this is a sexy legend. End credits. A run-down castle sits on a magnificent cliff. Arthur walks through his throne room, doing his best “pensive look.” He sits down and smells a flower from Guinevere’s wedding.

This, of course, reminds him of one time when he had sex with her. This, of course, serves as an excuse for Starz to show it again. Psh, we have better racks than that blonde stick. Back in present time, Arthur gives the command for his men to start training to fight. Dude, it’s been weeks of attacks and you are just now getting to that? Not only does this king have no honor, but he’s stupid too.

Leontes fondles his sleeping wife, Guinevere. Her hair is yellow and her eyebrows are black. She wakes up and pretends to love him. She asks him when they can get some land and leave Camelot (leaving all memory of her whoredom behind). Surely Leontes can build a better wooden cabin than King Arthur’s nasty, moss-ridden castle? Of course, it’s not that simple, Guin. Leontes wants to stay. We get a shot of Leontes' ass crack.

Claire Forlani, the actress who plays Arthur’s birthmother, is so much older than she was when she sexed up Brad Pitt in the tearjerking Meet Joe Black. But she is still amazingly beautiful. Good job bringing her back to screens, show. She sits, talking with Merlin. Merlin feeds her an apple. We bet they have sex one day. Merlin and Mommy notice Arthur creeping on Leontes and Guin kissing. They are concerned. Merlin whispered. God knows what he said. Or maybe not even God can hear that man…

Finally, Camelot shows us our girl, Morgan, and her superior castle. She seems hurt and upset. Her servant is concerned. Her servant is black. This show is probably racist. Back to Arthur. His army blows. Gawain asks Arthur what they are fighting for. “Freedom,” a very original Arthur replies. Gawain does not accept this response. “Then why are you here?” Arthur asks. “They told me you were worth following,” the Gawain replies. Because, you see, that is the essence of the Arthur story. He is a king worth following and believing in. But alas….in this incarnation, there is nothing to recommend him. Seriously, what are his good traits?

Gawain decides he wants to see Arthur fight. They battle. Arthur loses. What CAN this guy do? Merlin, ever in denial, decides that what Arthur lacks is a decent sword. Doesn’t Arthur have the sword he pulled from the stone now? In any case, the Gawain tells Merlin where he got his own swords. Merlin pulls Arthur aside to scold him for liking Guin. Oh Merlin, don’t you know teenagers? Old people denying them access just makes them want it more.

Arthur’s Mommy corners Guin and makes the excellent point that men will only want Guin because she is forbidden, being all married and whatnot. Back to Morgan. She is riding through the hills, still suffering and she wants to make it to Camelot to scope out Guin. Morgan's slave puts her foot down. Morgan’s safety comes first, and they should return to the castle that won’t give Morgan pneumonia. Arthur and Guin meet. Desperate to address the important things, Arthur asks if Leontes is better than him in bed. Guin didn’t answer, so we are assuming we are correct in answering “YES.” Guin tells Arthur it’s over. Arthur gives her his usual fish eyes.

Merlin rides a horse through a field to get to the sword maker, a choir intensely backing up his boring ride. Careful Merlin, a bald head like that can get a mighty burn if you don’t start wearing a hat on day-long journeys. Morgan returns to her castle to find a creepy old nun. “Who let her in? Get her out,” Morgan hollers. Morgan rages about her room, looking Gollum-esque. We think she has histrionic personality disorder.

Gawain starts training Arthur’s men. He cuts Kay’s arm. Arthur has a hissy. He says, “I need an honorable instructor.” Well, Arthur, we need an honorable protagonist. It’s too easy, Camelot. Quit feeding us lines. Gawain, still instructing, puts a knife to Arthur’s neck. He’s just reached favorite character status. Of course, that’s like being the tallest midget. But still. Leontes and Kay freak out. Dudes, he diddled both your women! Gawain lets Arthur go.

Back to Morgan, who is lying in her bed, looking like a sea corpse from the deep. She gets up, feeling better and wanting food. She eats ravenously, and it is more passionate than any love scene ever on this show. Morgan reveals to her servant that the nun comes from the convent Uther sent her to as a girl. She demands more food and starts bleeding from the eyes. The nun is invited inside.

Merlin catches the sword maker who demands that Merlin leave his property and threatens to slit Merlin from a**hole to cakehole. Clever (sarcasm). They whisper threateningly at each other before the sword maker invites Merlin inside. Back to Morgan. The nun figures out that Morgan’s body is “under attack” because she performed a summoning. Back to Merlin, who has described Arthur as “not strong.” Even Merlin admits it. The sword maker (oh, correction, “Blade Master”) starts making Arthur a sword. Even though we distinctly remember Arthur pulling a sword from a stone. And then falling and hitting his head. The Blade Master taunted Merlin about how Merlin doesn’t use his powers a lot. Merlin wigs, goes into the woods, and starts a tall fire in a fireplace. He enjoys it. The Blade Master’s daughter sees him do that.

Morgan is dying. She demands that the nun get her through this. The nun gives her a pep talk. Morgan screams that the crown means everything to her. She starts seeing visions of her dead lover and dead father. She passes out. It looks like she died, but we know better. Flash to Merlin, who is dreaming. His dream includes Arthur getting stabbed in the gut.

Merlin wakes. The Blade Master shows Merlin Arthur’s new sword. “Best I’ve ever made,” he says. Of course it is. Cliché freaking show. The Blade Master wants to take it to Arthur himself, but Merlin objects, saying that he didn’t want the old soldier near his king. After that dream, this might be a smart move. The two fought and Merlin burned the Blade Master to a crisp. What an idiot, fighting a sorcerer with a sword.

The Blade Master’s daughter was upset and bashed the sword’s handle on Merlin’s head. It seems she is as smart as her father. She should have stuck him with the pointy end. We guess sword talent isn’t genetic. She fled with the sword to a lake, got in a boat, and started rowing out. Merlin froze the lake. The girl grabbed the sword and fell into the unfrozen part of the lake. The lake froze over the girl, but she reached the sword up through the ice. The ice froze around her arm and Merlin grabbed the sword from her. She pounded at the ice, but Merlin couldn’t save her. Don’t have a spell to melt ice, bro? He apologized down at the ice. Well, that makes it better.

Morgan woke up. The nun says she was “reborn.” She put Morgan to bed, but just when we thought she was fine, she started thrashing and squealing like a possessed person in a horror movie. The nun led Morgan to a mirror and it was revealed that Morgan now looks just like Arthur’s Mommy. Morgan was upset but then realized that she can feel what Mommy is feeling over in Arthur’s hovel. “Pain. She’s feeling pain.” Morgan smiles wickedly. This whole Morgan storyline was weird this week.

Back to Arthur, stalking through the halls of his castle. Clearly, he has nothing better to do. His Mommy stops him and gives him the “there are other fish in the sea” sentiment. He mouths off and she slaps him. She said that a lot of people died when Arthur’s father took a forbidden woman and she wouldn’t let that happen again. Arthur went back to the training camp, gave a hypocritical speech, and challenged Leontes to a fight. Guin was there to see it. It was just a practice fight, so no one won, but it won Gawain over to Arthur’s side. Darn. Guin and Arthur had another little “it’s over” spat.

Merlin sat at a bar, picked a fight, and got his butt handed to him. Interesting character development? Did he want to punish himself for the day's events? Merlin returned to Arthur’s castle with the new sword. Mouth open, Arthur unwrapped it. Everyone looked at it in awe, like it was Harry Potter’s Firebolt or something. Merlin lied about how he got the sword, making up some crazy story about mist and a siren. The siren supposedly named the sword Excalibur. Mouth still open, Arthur held it up, moving it slowly. Cut to the Blade Master’s daughter floating in the lake. End.

Once again, we don’t care about the protagonists, Arthur is lame, and we want Morgan to win.

Episode grade: F

A Wee Saturday-Morning TV Chat

ern (1:14:37 PM): I just turned on The Vampire Diaries!!!
Leeard (1:15:00 PM): Psh, took you long enough
ern (1:15:12 PM): I've been very busy. Is it good?
Leeard (1:15:19 PM): Duh. Why is that even a question?
ern (1:19:46 PM): Because I'm an artard. Clearly
Leeard (1:21:16 PM): ah
ern (1:24:39 PM): So whatcha doonin?
Leeard (1:24:46 PM): Watching Degrassi and avoiding working on a presentation. It’s not as good as TVD, but still. Also, Bones is suuuuuuper predictable this week.
ern (1:26:37 PM): I think Imma skip it
Leeard (1:26:54 PM): Imma tell you that's probably a good call
ern (1:27:53 PM): Ughhh, you guys, Klaus is Alaric. Shut uppp. Well, now Caroline came out as Jackie-o, completely missing that Jackie was a brunette.
Leeard (1:30:16 PM): Psh, that doesn’t mean anything. Doesn't she look adorable?
ern (1:30:24 PM): She does, but I think you have to be brunette when you dress up as her
Leeard (1:31:02 PM): I think it's still obvious who she is
ern (1:31:10 PM): true, but it's a sacrilege
Leeard (1:31:31 PM): You're sacrilege
ern (1:31:48 PM): why hasn't Elena made out with Damon yet?
Leeard (1:32:07 PM): Good freaking question
ern (1:32:22 PM): Poor Jeremy
Leeard (1:32:33 PM): Why?
ern (1:32:45 PM): Because he can't do anything to help Bonnie except walk around looking hot. I hate that Matt is undercover with Caroline’s mom
Leeard (1:33:29 PM): I do too, but I also love it. Like, I’m scared because I feel like it's dangerous for one or both of them. But I also love that they know. ALSO I MISS TYLER
ern (1:36:19 PM): I do NOT like Matt's hair like that and I do NOT like how he is betraying Caroline. Also, I just ate my weight in chicken
Leeard (1:36:44 PM): yummy. I don't like how he's betraying Caroline, but .... she's a vampire
ern (1:37:24 PM): She explained what happened and he took NOT her side
Leeard (1:38:00 PM): he doesn't view her as Caroline anymore
ern (1:38:08 PM): well, he's wrong
Leeard (1:38:09 PM): so he didn't betray HER
ern (1:39:12 PM): Dance club version of "I Think We're Alone Now"? Bonnie is so meh.
Leeard (1:39:48 PM): ugh you're so meh
ern (1:39:57 PM): YOU'RE so meh
Leeard (1:40:04 PM): Wow good comeback
ern (1:40:10 PM): It hates you, precious
Leeard (1:40:12 PM): No, it doesn’t.
ern (1:42:05 PM): Elena just found out Klaus took a body. Elena's thinking, "I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN WHEN HE DIDN'T KNOW WATERGATE WAS IN THE 70S!"
Leeard (1:42:12 PM): um duh. Also, did you yell at your TV when they left Elena and Jeremy together?
ern (1:42:37 PM): I don’t like the way the actor is playing Alaric/Klaus, and no, because I don't yell at my TV, weirdo.
Leeard (1:42:49 PM): like, DON'T LET THE HUMANS BE ALONE. Ha okay I don't know if you'll like Happy Endings, but I’m cracking up
ern (1:43:46 PM): I don’t usually like stuff like that, but I will give it a try
ern (1:45:40 PM): Bonnie NO. Don’t kill Alaric. Oh my jeezzzz.
Leeard (1:47:01 PM): mmhmm
ern (1:47:11 PM): YES YES A+. Bonnie DEAD. And now Elena is going to hate Damon. But Bonnie and Damon never got to have sex! Shame. It’s sad that Elena is sad. Well, at least Kat Graham still has this to fall back on- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2JYMDYdOgRk

Leeard (1:51:31 PM): okay, i liked the pilot of Happy Endings. Also, I sure hope that's the Bieber video
ern (1:51:47 PM): I usually don't like stuff like Happy Endings. Kat's in a Bieber video?
Leeard (1:52:05 PM): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SOI4OF7iIr4
ern (1:52:08 PM): She’s not dead. Stupid fake-out.
Leeard (1:52:51 PM): That's why i haven't said anything since you said how happy you were that she died. Also, it's not a season finale and there were still 10 minutes left, did you actually expect her to die?
ern (1:53:56 PM): Some shows go there. Skype? Hopefully Klaus isn't a hacker
Leeard (1:54:41 PM): I mean, this show goes there too, but not with that much time left in an episode. Come on, even I knew she wasn't actually dead
ern (1:56:42 PM): ELENA NO
Leeard (1:56:47 PM): ELENA YES
ern (1:57:01 PM): why WHYYYYY? This show is so convoluted, I forgot why she would pull the dagger out of Elijah.
Leeard (1:57:18 PM): a) to be able to kill klaus with the dagger and b) because elijah wants klaus dead too
Ern (1:57:20 PM): Ughhhh
Leeard (1:57:25 PM): No joke, i've been listening to this song non-stop. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x-64CaD8GXw
ern (1:57:26 PM): I have that on my 'pod
Leeard (1:57:28 PM): I do too, hence me listening to it non-stop
ern (1:57:42 PM): That's one of my dad's rings on his phone
Leeard (1:57:56 PM): Your dad is cool

A Few Glee Song Promos and Gaga News

There are other songs in the next episode, but they don't have previews yet.

Also, Lady Gaga released her second single from her upcoming album. The song is called "Judas," and it is not as good as "Bad Romance," but it is better than "Born This Way." The song released four days early. The album is expected May 23rd, 2011, as you probably already know.

Classic Books to Read and Skip

Classic books: Bane of the normal person’s existence or something you should check out post-high school? So many people mean to read classic books and never do. “One day I will whip out that Proust and be considered intelligent by mankind!” Some people have to read them all, to appear well-read.

Some people, like us, only want to read what we are going to enjoy and/or get something out of.

Now, there are uber-lit nerds who love just about every classic book and would crucify us for this post. But those people don’t NEED this post, because they’ve read, or will read, all of the books anyway. Here is our list of classic books that you have to read and classic books that you can skip. And classic books that you can just rent the movie instead. We haven't mentioned classic books that we haven't read, so the list isn't necessarily a complete one.

Pride and Prejudice: Blogger disagreement. Ern- "It’s so brilliant, it’s so witty, wah wah wah. Mark Twain didn't even like Jane Austen. If you have seen any of the movies (and unless you’ve lived under a rock your whole life), you’ve got the gist. Same story with Jane Eyre, Sense and Sensibility, Emma, and Little Women. Don’t feel like you HAVE to read these chick classics if you don't want to. But they are fun if you WANT to read them. You have to at least see the movies though. These things go down better with hot guy visuals." Leeard- "Love Jane Austen. Pride and Prejudice is one of my favorite classics, and you must read it. Along with Little Women."

The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis: Read it. We know what you are thinking. “This is only for Christians.” No, no, no. We know a hardcore atheist who loves this book. It’s great for moral self-examination. It’s dark, it’s clever, it’s funny, it’s short, and it helps you look at your own arrogance, how you treat others, and how you think. Premise- One demon writes letters to a junior demon on how to ruin his “patient,” a human the junior demon is trying to destroy. How does this not sound awesome?

Harry Potter: Read it. Read it all. There are some people out there who don’t like fantasy. We don’t know how to help you, except to tell you to ease into it with romance (The Anita Blake Vampire Hunter series, up to “Obsidian Butterfly.” After that, things just get slutty and weird.) or funny mystery (The Dresden Files. The books, never the TV show). If you tried to get into it by reading the first book, and that didn’t work out, skip to the more adult ones. Read a summary of books one and two (or watch the movies, even though those two movies are the worst of the movies) and move onto book three. But if you miss 4, 5, 6, and 7 of this series, you are truly missing out.

Lord of the Rings: Read the famous quotes (just google “famous quotes” and the dialogue in the books, after you see the extended versions of all the movies. The movies aren’t missing scenery and story. What the movies lack is the amazing dialogue. And read the Tom Bombadil part in book one. That’s all you need, but we think if you’re a fantasy person, you will want to read it all.

Crime and Punishment: Skip it. Read The Brothers Karamazov instead. Why do they teach Crime and Punishment in high school? Because it’s considerably more lightweight than Brothers, Dostoevsky’s last book and spiritual powerhouse. Pressed for time? Just read the chapter called “The Grand Inquisitor” and the chapter before that.

Aaaand this paragraph threatens to incur the wrath of Cat, but we will risk it. Shakespeare!: Ones you have to read- Hamlet, King Lear, Richard III, The Tempest, Macbeth, Othello, Merchant of Venice Well, maybe. It's a little anti-Semitic). But if you have the chance to see a decent production of ANY Shakespeare play, go. Also, his poetry isn’t great. Very skip-able. Try Rainer Maria Rilke instead. Or T.S. Eliot. We fully believe that plays were meant to be performed and watched, not read.

Pilgrim’s Progress: There is a very good picture book version of this that haunted our nightmares as children. If you can’t find that, then yes, you have to read the book, if only because it’s just so amazingly weird and dark. But we’re pretty sure only religious people are going to get this one.

Wuthering Heights: It is short and easy, so go ahead and read it.

1984: You must. The movie doesn't make sense unless you read it anyway.

Anna Karenina: Another one that fares better onscreen. The book is a little dull. War and Peace is better, if you want Tolstoy. But that’s another long one. Tolstoy has great character descriptions, if you are into that.

The Secret Garden and Last of the Mohicans: It’s movie time.

Les Miserables: See the musical. It’s a great story though.

Anything by Charles Dickens: MOVIES.

Ender’s Game: Unless someone has spoiled it for you, like that beyotch in Barnes and Noble did to Ern's brother, read it. Leeard thinks that even if someone has spoiled it for you, you should still read it. Orson Scott Card creates an entire world in this book, and never has to dumb it down.

The Shining by Stephen King: YES this counts as a classic. Don’t argue with us. Also, The Dark Tower series. Read them. Skip The Shining if you’ve seen the movie, but if you haven’t, read the book and then see the movie.

Flatland: Yes. It’s short and full of good information for humans.

The Sound and the Fury: Read it if you are compassionate and you like characters. Read it if you are a Cormac McCarthy fan, because he is above the use of punctuation and you wish other authors were as free with their style. But keep the cliffnotes handy, because several parts of it are hard to follow, even for good readers.

The Hunchback of Notre Dame: Read it. It’s very different from the Disney version. After the book depresses you, rent the Disney version.

Moby Dick: Unless you are thrilled by the subject, get the cliffnotes.

Tom Sawyer/Huck Finn: Read them. They are fun.

Heart of Darkness: There is a kid in every high school class. He wears dark, disheveled clothes, and yet he is still cool. He is cynical, dark, mocking, sarcastic, and superior to everyone. His favorite movies are A Clockwork Orange and Donnie Darko (not that there’s anything wrong with that). He loves this book. Unless you are him, you can skip it.

Dante’s Inferno: Read it if you are at all interested. You will know if this kind of thing is your bag. But it’s very, very good and worthwhile.

The Stranger and Portrait of an Artist as a Young Man: If you are an atheist or an existentialist, you will love these. If you are not, you will find them simplistic, depressing and shallow.

Narnia: To read- The Silver Chair, The Last Battle, Voyage of the Dawn Treader. To skip- The others. To see the movie: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe and Prince Caspian. Bonus points if you watch the British versions with the really funny-looking Lucy.

The Scarlett Letter: Skip it. Just don't judge people. Big Love is much more timely.

Their Eyes Were Watching God: Skip it. The bloggers are in complete and total agreement on that.

The Odyssey: Surprisingly not boring.

The Red Badge of Courage: Skip it. The guy is a chicken anyway, so why is it called that?

A Separate Peace: Read it.

The Bible: No other book has shaped this culture as much as this one. Even if you know you won't believe a word of it, it's a must. You can just read a summary of Numbers and Joshua if you want though. And maybe Leviticus. We think that's important though.

Brideshead Revisited: Laaaame. Ok, there's this old man who does not like religion, but just before he dies, he calls for a priest and gets religious for two seconds, because he is about to die. It's supposed to be a good thing, but we think it's incredibly disappointing that he didn't stick to his guns and how he lived his life.

Beloved: Leeard has been forced to read this book 3 times for different classes, and has hated it every time. Some people love this book, but we can't figure out why.

Others to read: Brave New World, The Catcher In the Rye, A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, The Diary of Anne Frank (the unabridged version where she reveals she's kind of a lesbian), anything by G.K. Chesterton, old fairy tales. The Great Gatsby, The Phantom Tollbooth, and To Kill a Mockingbird (but if you don't want to, the movie will suffice).

Agree? Disagree? Have some of your own to add to the must-read list?

Other New Shows We Like

No time or inclination to do a full post on these, but we thought we would mention that we are liking The Chicago Code and Breaking In. These are good new shows so far.

Much better than Camelot, which we have decided to watch for the sole purpose of hating on it. Look forward to the hate posts, friends.

Bad acting, not a cute Arthur, not interesting, Arthur has no honor, Joseph Fiennes, the show brings nothing new to the table, Arthur is a slut, no good fight scenes, boring, dank atmosphere, Arthur is not a king we would follow..... We could go on. And we will.

We hate that show. Almost as much as we hate Two and a Half Men, a show we won't even watch for hate-post purposes.

Two Shows End Their Seasons

Two very different shows came to an end in the past week. Sadly, the one that is probably ending for good did not give us a satisfying conclusion.

Off the Map: After a cheesy, uneven, uninspired start, this show evolved into something we actually looked forward to every Wednesday. But all the hype and the lame, self-conscious pilot turned off too many people. The ratings were down, and actors have started jumping ship, knowing the show is over. The season (probably series) finale left us with many questions. Will the amazing Mina Minard return Tommy’s feelings of love? Will Ryan live? Will Mateo live? WILL THE SHOW LIVE? Too many questions, and we will be annoyed if the show is canceled and we completely wasted our lives on a season of this show and got no closure. Leeard is taking this worse than Ern is (probably because Ern watches Grey’s Anatomy and so Off the Map won’t leave as big of a gap in her doctor drama schedule). Ern still thinks there is a chance for renewal. Leeard does not. But Leeard loves it.

Season grade if we get a next season: B-

Season grade if we don’t: D-

Being Human: This ending was much tidier. Maybe too tidy (until the very last scene, that is). Poor guy-who-plays-Jacob-on-LOST. Not only can you not act, but you always get killed off of your shows. This show has been renewed for a second season, to air on SyFy. One of us wants to check out the BBC version over the summer, once most of the regular TV goes away. But this version has been pretty enjoyable, and we will be tuning in next year. We liked the season as a whole, but the finale was only “ok.” Our minds weren’t blown and we think they played it too safe.

Season grade: B+

Sunday Night Shows and One Movie

This Sunday, we tuned into The Killing on AMC and The Borgias on Showtime.

Maybe it’s because our expectations were so low after the abysmal pilot, but we enjoyed The Borgias this week. In fact, we would go so far as to say that if you are interested in this show but were put off by our review, you should watch the most recent episode, The Moor, to see if you like it. It’s only 50 minutes long, the pacing is better, there is more story than sex (in fact, there was no sex), the characters are starting to develop, and stuff actually happens. There is also a…er….stuffed people last supper. It’s pretty gross, but awesomely so. If the show continues to improve at this rate, it might actually become watchable. It looks like one of us is sticking with it for a while.

The Borgias Episode Grade: B

The Killing is yet another great show that AMC can add to its impressive catalogue. It’s a dark, subtle murder mystery that packed a wallop of an emotional punch in its first episode and continues to intrigue. Let’s just say it’s a little better than your average Bones episode. We recommend it.

The Killing Episode Grade: A-

Then, one of us saw the new Arthur. Let's just say that the funniest parts were in the trailer. Not recommended, even though we liked its handling of the alcohol addiction issue. Just not enough laughs, even with a decent cast and Russell Brand's amusing accent.

Arthur Movie Grade: C-