American Horror Story- Season 2, episodes 7-9

By Rubenstein  Uploaded by MyCanon (Lily Rabe) [CC-BY-2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

At this point in the season, this show's ever-present problems are starting to wear on us. It's running too long, mostly because it's been in its climax almost the entire time. When you're always going 100 miles per hour on a show, it makes it hard to appreciate developments. We complain about build-up and quiet episodes, but we really do need a show to keep us at 20 mph before speeding up. You have to f***ing earn it, Ryan. If you want us to feel real horror, real devastation, and real fear, you have to work on us for a while, sit with us, introduce us to ideas, and THEN shoot your wad.



American Horror Story can't sustain this pacing because NO ONE can sustain this pacing and make anything besides loud, over-the-top schlock. This isn't a show we'd ever consider dropping though, because the acting and characters are too fun and it reboots every year. The yearly concept change breathes new life into AHS's tired body, making us curious to find out what Ryan Murphy thinks is scary this year.

We liked the angel of death, even though she's totally random. This season is too crowded. We've got angels, demons, aliens, serial killers, evil nuns, a Holocaust doctor, random psychos, and monsters. Come on. So when the angel of death showed up, we were like, "Fine, show. Fine. Just throw all the letter in the alphabet soup and stir. We'll eat it." Save some material for next year, why don't you? The Lana stuff in the last couple of weeks: Ugh.

We hate hate hate hate hate watching rape scenes and feel that they are unnecessary 99% of the time. We've probably seen or read hundreds of rape scenes in our time partaking of entertainment, and it isn't right. Then she had to get pregnant and try to kill the fetus with a coat hanger. We're 100% done with Lana and her plotline. It's too much, it's too sad, it's too hard to watch, and it's not handled with the sensitivity and humanity that should be afforded a character who went through what millions of women have had to go through. There's no way they could watch this show.

The biggest and most welcome surprise has been Sister Jude becoming a hero of sorts. From going after Arden, that chicken priest, and Eunice to apologizing to Lana, Jude is on the road to redemption. Well, as much as you can on this show. Since she started out so horrible, we were interested to see her turn into the protagonist, the biggest danger to the evil forces on this show, and the person we root for the most. The enemy of our enemy (our enemy being Nazis everywhere) is our friend. And Sister Jude is a complicated character.

As we and Israel Fernandez discussed in the comments of the Golden Globes post, Lily Rabe has been great this year. She's gotten all the best lines on the show, and she's managed to seem sexy while also being the worst. The Christmas episode was great mostly because of Lily trotting around being evil during the holidays, especially with her savage little tree. Ian McShane as the murderous Santa, Leigh, was pretty good. His performance would have been scene-stealing on any other show. But this show has so many big characters running around that Ian is going to be just another face in the insane asylum.

Grace is so pretty. Is she dead or did the aliens revive her? Since we expect everyone on this show to die a horrible death, her dying brought no emotion to us. There are no stakes. Since we saw her, pregnant, with Pepper (who the aliens made smart?!!), we guess she's probably not even dead. EVEN FEWER STAKES. But the show sure pushed the envelope with that crucifixion, right? Wrong. Before you can push the envelope, you have to put something into the envelope. For such a well-loved show, it sure is a shallow one. Howard totally deserved to die.

We loved seeing Brooke Smith last night as the therapist, but she was unfortunately killed off too soon. It's good to see her getting work though. She did a great job on Grey's Anatomy, even though no one liked her cold character. Kit is working with Arden to expose the aliens now? That doesn't seem like something anyone would actually do. Kit, what are you thinking? Is it just bad writing? We'll be back in January with the rest of you, because no matter how much this show is just an exercise in wasted potential, it's the train crash we can't look away from. And Lily Rabe. Yeah. Lily Rabe.

Dark Cousin: B-
Unholy Night: B
The Coat Hanger: C+