Fiona’s moral compass is off this week, and she sleeps
with a married crush from her high school days. He's played by Taylor Kinney from The Vampire Diaries (Uncle Mason), so we can't really blame her. Even Lady Gaga had to get a piece of that action. However, that is the ONLY time you will see us excusing adultery. It's not like Fiona has any role models at all. Fiona also finds a purse left on
the train with five hundred bucks in it. Because the purse is designer and
real, Fiona assumes that it belongs to a rich woman and decides to keep the
money and spend it. Then Fiona finds out that the woman who owned the purse is
poor, with children, and from Fiona’s neighborhood. Fiona busts her butt at
work and makes the money back so that she can return it to the woman. When she
tries, the woman accuses her of stealing it in the first place and the two get
into a fight. Fiona walks away, her attempt at being nice ruined. She then
calls Steve, just to say hi. We see him, in paradise, getting a blow job. So
sad.
Frank gets Butterface to agree to marry him so that he
can get her pension money when she dies. When she is in the shower, Frank
intercepts a call from the hospital offering her a heart and tells the hospital
that she has passed away. When Butterface hears that there was a heart she
missed, she offers Frank money to sleep with her so that she will die. Any
redeeming quality Frank ever had is negated by this storyline, and we are
surprised the show had him do anything as horrible as killing Dottie. This
makes sleeping with his son’s girlfriend and surrogate daughter seem like
nothing.
Debbie becomes obsessed with death, Kevin thinks about buying the bar even though Veronica doesn’t think he can handle it, Lip meets
with a soldier to get information for Ian about West Point, and Jody asks Karen
to marry him. Poor Lip. Overall, this week was a little sad, but still funny.
We’re glad that we finally saw Steve and we hope he’s back in Fiona’s life
soon. The plot with Fiona’s high school crush was funny, mostly because he ended
up being so comically bad at sex. We think Fiona learned her lesson.
Episode grade: B
Being Human - Do You Really Want to Hurt Me?
Nora, transformed into a werewolf, kills Heggeman, much
to Leeard’s joy, because she’s been hating Heggeman for a while. Daughter turns
out to be named Suren. Lame. We had hoped her name would just be Daughter.
Aiden digs her up from her grave and she is one ugly puppy for a few hours.
Aidan feeds Suren willing people until she regains her strength and her looks.
And hey! Look! It’s Sierra from Dollhouse. Nice. We think she’s pretty
cool-looking. Aidan suggests that they get a vampire police officer to assist
them, but Suren takes a human police officer named Cecelia off the street.
Believing that one of their own sires, rather than one of Bishop’s would be
more loyal, Suren asks Aidan to turn Cecilia, fully knowing that Aidan is
trying not to eat humans. He refuses and Suren turns Cecilia.
Sally’s plot was the weirdest this week. She didn’t like
the experience of sleeping while dead, because of the nightmare she had. She
has Stevie and his friends Dylan and Boner over to the house. The best line of
the episode was when someone said that a ghost hadn’t moved on because he
hadn’t seen Scarface. Ha. You know Ern hasn’t seen Scarface? Now that Nora is a werewolf, she can see Sally. Josh tries to get Nora to live normally and forget about her miscarriage
and lycanthropy. The two go to a first-year med student mixer, where Nora gets
drunk and almost spills all her bad news to the partygoers. Josh decides to drop out of medical school
and look for a cure for lycanthropy. Yeah…good luck with that. We feel so bad
for Nora, but we like seeing Josh trying to take care of her and make little
jokes. It’s endearing.
Sally and her ghost boys go to a party where Sally finds
out that ghosts can possess living people’s bodies if those people are either
willing or not in their right minds. The young people at the party were
drinking, so they were ripe for possession. After a few botched attempts, Sally
is able to possess a girl and heads right to the snack table. That’s the first
thing we would do too, girl. Sally is happy that she is able to feel and taste,
until Dylan pretty much tries to rape her right in the middle of the party.
Stevie pulls both Sally and Dylan out of the bodies in order to help Sally, and
then Stevie annihilates Dylan. That’s the best word for it, really. Stevie
permanently destroys Dylan, causing him to disintegrate. Sally is upset and
afraid that ghosts can destroy each other. Nora tells Sally that it’s better to
know what you are capable of and it is revealed that she remembers killing
Heggeman.
Episode grade: B+
Justified - Cut Ties
This wasn’t the best episode of this show, but it wasn’t
bad either. Raylan and a Marshall he used to know, played by Carla Gugino,
spent the episode trying to protect someone in the witness protection program.
Art steps out from behind his desk to help. It was pretty cool to see Art out
and about. We generally don’t like him because of how he hates Raylan, but he was
competent and charismatic in this episode. There was a little mystery as to who
got one witness killed in the first place and it was fun to see that unravel.
Raylan realizes that Boyd wanted to go to prison so he
starts trying to get Boyd out by recanting his statement about the fight.
Through hard work, Boyd is able to get alone with Dickie so that he can
threaten him and find out the location of all the Bennett money. Dickie reveals
that Mags gave all her money to Limehouse, a mob guy/crime lord in Harlan
County. Yep, that’s gonna be important later. This episode was filler, but
Justified filler is still pretty entertaining. Everything we’ve written about
this show has been really short because all we ever want to say is, “Good
dialogue.”
Episode grade: B-
Gossip Girl - The Father and the Bride
It’s time for this wedding already. All this lead-up is
driving us crazy. They’ve been talking about this Blair wedding forever. We
need to see her in the dress, see the ceremony, and then have her take off with
Chuck or something. If the wedding actually goes through to the “I do’s,” we
will be surprised, but we won’t be pleased. This week was the bachelorette
party and Beatrice conspired to get Blair really drunk so that Blair would say
something that Beatrice could use to stop the wedding. Beatrice was scheming
with her cousin, the priest. A priest scheming to get a young girl really drunk
just sounds wrong. Beatrice has a change of heart though, and the priest is
forced to choose Louis’ mother as his new partner in his “stop the wedding”
conspiracy. All this would be intense if anyone really wanted this wedding to
happen anyway. Hilariously, Blair’s bachelorette party ends in her brief arrest
for having a doobie in her mouth. That scene was great work from Meester, who
really can be funny given the right material.
Nate, Serena, and Gossip Girl get together to find out
that Trip was the one responsible for the car accident. Trip was just trying to
ruin Nate’s night. He didn’t actually want to kill or seriously injure anyone.
But Trip’s life is over now and we don’t care. The only time we even remember
that guy is when the show brings him up. We’re not even sure if his name is
spelled with one or two “p’s” and we’re not going to look it up. Serena still
has feelings for Dan and asks him to keep up their fake relationship, for
Blair’s sake, even though Blair told Serena that they could stop pretending.
Dan wrote Louis’ vows for him, and Blair saw them and thought that Louis really
understood her or something. This made her more sure of her decision to marry Louis.
Good grief. What a circus. But we are really like the plotline where Serena is
trying to win Dan back just as he’s trying to ditch her in order to help his
writing career.
Episode grade: B-
Parks and Recreation - Bowling for Votes
Ben and Leslie hold a focus group where one man doesn’t
like Leslie, because she doesn’t seem like someone he would like to bowl with.
Leslie freaks out, invites this man (anonymously) to a bowling party soon after
and proceeds to try to win him over. It doesn’t work, because this man is
obviously a douche. He calls Leslie a bitch and Ben punches him. In a press
conference, Leslie stands by Ben and this causes the people in her next focus
group to like Leslie a lot.
Meanwhile, April, Chris, Andy, Jerry, Donna, and Ron try
to raise funds for the campaign. Chris and Jerry make it into a competition
which April is determined to win so that she can ruin Chris’ happiness. April
shows Chris kindness after Millie dumps him. It’s so funny to see April try to
be sweet. We are kind of feeling Chris and Ann again. Anyone else? This episode
was cute and funny, as usual. Both plots worked for us and were equally funny.
Episode grade: A
About Gossip Girl: What kind of a priest is that guy, anyway? I don't get it. It's like, can't anyone on this show be normal and have moral values? But then again, this show is entertaining so who cares if it is completely unrealistic.
ReplyDeleteThe most moral people on the show are Nate, Dan, and Serena, even though Dan creeps toward self-righteous a lot of the time. Who are you judging, Dan? You had a threesome with Vanessa and Hilary Duff. Everyone has done something a little scandalous though, in real life. Still, we're not digging the priest.
DeleteDan bothers me sometimes, because he is definitely not one to be preaching on morality but he does anyway. Nate is a genuinely good guy and Serena, while boring sometimes, has good intentions. It's funny, though, how everyone's favorite characters on the show are the ones with the least moral values. I guess that makes better television.
DeleteOn this show, the baddies are the best. On other shows, we like the good guys. (Once Upon a Time, The Good Wife, Grey's Anatomy, Glee, Southland, Little House on the Prairie.) And we actually liked Chuck more when he was good. The end of this episode made us wonder if that was gone.
DeleteSAME (about Chuck)! I loved watching his evolution, and now it seems like he's going backwards. I was like, "No Chuck no!" This show is going to become as inconsistent as Glee.
DeleteMy favorite P&R line of the season was when Ann said, "Aren't you scared to eat there?" and Ron Swanson said, "When I eat, it is the food that is scared."
ReplyDeleteAlso, should I start watching GG again??
Last night's GG was eventful. They revealed who Gossip Girl was and Blair had her wedding....or did she?
DeleteBut we wouldn't start watching again if we were you and had been able to drop it. Seasons 1 and 2 were the best.