After a relatively strong season opener, South Park fell back to mere loud, unfunny commentary in this Comedy Central-lampooning episode about how lame both comedy awards and Tyler Perry are. We did think the robot saying, "Awkwaaaard" was funny though. People who say that often need to be shot. But seriously, was this episode written by Germans or something. Not up to snuff, humor-wise. Was it the lack of much Cartman? Episode grade: C-
Modern Family - Mother's Day
Is anyone else tired of seeing Jay be so mean to Phil? Phil is the BEST. The show wasn't as funny as usual this week, although we continue to love the chemistry between the children in the cast. Episode Grade: B-
America's Next Top Model - Daniella Issa Helayel
Alexandria got the boot! Her control issues started coming out in her face, her picture wasn't model-esque, and she was sent home. Despite complaining, boasting, cursing, and anger issues, Molly got best photo. Because of her talking heads, we don't think she's going to win though. With only a few girls left, it's safe to start betting on the winner. Our money is on Brittani. But will anyone care to keep watching now that this season's most polarizing and entertaining contestant is gone?
Episode grade: A-
Cougar Town - Lonesome Sundown
The first half of this episode was weird and a little too immature. The punishments and Jules on the boat were kind of a drag in the beginning. But those things turned out well. Then CT brought the heart along with the humor when Travis got shot down by Kirsten and sat with his mom and Grayson in the aftermath. Bittersweet episode. And we think Travis' roommate should sing more on the show.
Episode grade: B+
Community - A Fistfull of Paintballs
Josh Holloway! We've missed you. No time to cry for LOST though, because the episode launched right into the action - another Community paintball war. And this time, it was bigger and bolder than ever. How awesome was Annie? How fun is this show to have one of its main characters (Pierce) become so villainous? This is a two-parter, and we can't wait for the second installment. Lots of fun and humor.
Episode Grade: A-
Parks and Recreation - Eagleton
Parker Posey guest starred, and she was pretty great playing a rival of Leslie's. The real fun of this episode was Ron Swanson's birthday and the funny way that played out. This show has such a sweet spirit.
Episode Grade: A-
The Office - The Inner Circle
Michael is gone and he left us with the worst possible replacement - Will Ferrel. Ugh. In this unfunny episode, Deangelo acted crazy and then got hospitalized for showing off. We're pretty sure that's the end of him. Good riddance. We need a FUNNY new boss to carry this show.
Episode Grade: C+
Grey's Anatomy - White Wedding
Continuing its streak of predictability this season, Grey's had Callie and Arizona get married and so did Meredith and Derek (so they could adopt a baby...yawn, even though it's the cutest baby ever and we love seeing Derek with it). We liked the way Callie's mom wasn't demonized for having a religious belief that would cause her distress regarding this marriage. There are homophobic people and people who believe that homosexuality is wrong. Even if we disagree with both groups, there's a difference between them. Callie's parents have their beliefs, but it's clear they love her, and we loved when the dad came back for the father-daughter dance. Great timing, huh? The rift between Teddy and Cristina grew, because Cristina wouldn't apologize for doing nothing wrong, and Teddy has made up a "teaching reason" why Cristina should be off of her service. Owen proved to be an ineffective mediator. We hope Teddy goes off with her shrink boyfriend to a foreign hospital soon. The best moment of this episode was when Stark recommended April for chief resident. That was sweet. The next episode looks better.
Episode grade: B
The Vampire Diaries - The Sun Also Rises
Oh, this show. This was a real downer, but in the best way ever. Who knew that we would be so sad over Jenna and John? Wait, who is going to take care of the kiddies now? We're upset that Matt, after showing so much sack in the past two weeks, decided that he couldn't handle the supernatural stuff and went back to his mundane life of "paying bills." We want a serious triangle between Matt, Caroline, and Tyler. Matt had better get it in gear. As usual, Stefan, Damon, and Elena are awesome. Bonnie is growing on us. We did not predict the end. How on earth are they going to be able to wrap up enough in one episode to give us a satisfying finale? We know there will be a cliffhanger, but we are praying there's SOME closure to the events this season. It's hard enough to wait for this show to come back as it is.
This blog was totally supportive of new judges Steven Tyler and Jennifer Lopez during auditions and Hollywood week. They were entertaining, sometimes touching, fun, crazy, and, best of all, they picked great contestants.
But since then, they have sucked.
What we liked about Simon Cowell was his honesty. It wasn't that he was mean; it was that his words fit what we saw on the screen. He said what we were saying, and whether it was good or bad, he said it bluntly and directly. He wasn't a politician trying to re-vamp a music career, like J-Lo. We also like the humor and the British accent, but that was secondary.
With J-Lo, all we hear is praise for Lusk, whose rendition of "No Air" was one of the worst things we've ever heard on TV. We'd rather hear Frasier Crane sing "Three Little Maids from School Are We."
With Randy, all we hear is praise for James Durbin, even though he was pretty sharp and off-key last night.
With Steven Tyler, all we hear are crazy ramblings, dirty catchphrases, and then a declaration that it was beautiful and he liked it.
Where is the constructive criticism? Randy and J-Lo try to give it, but everyone at home watching knows what they are recommending is wrong. They seem to think that Lauren is going to turn into a belter like Jennifer Hudson if she just "takes a risk." They want the girl to yell, and she just doesn't have that kind of voice.
The girl who IS yelling enough can't catch a break with these judges either. She killed Lady Gaga's "You and I" last night, and all they could do was complain after lavishing "meh" Scotty performances and horrible Lusk performances with praise. They finally had to give Haley her due after she brought the house down with her last number, which gave us chills.
Why can't these judges get behind Haley, the most consistently on-key singer in the competition? Lauren also sings the right notes though. Haley takes the risks and has charisma while performing. We hope she sticks around longer.
The judges aren't saying what rational people are thinking. They've picked their favorites, and they are sticking with them, no matter how they do in the performances. Their suggestions and comparisons are off-the-wall. Are they hearing what we are hearing?
These judges seem to have an agenda. To promote themselves, look good, get a certain type of music popular, get a certain gender or race to the top, get the contestants to sing what they envision they should sing rather than just honestly give an opinion.
Also, if Jacob Lusk doesn't go home this week, we are going to complain about it every day until he DOES go home.
As readers of the books, we can promise that it's getting to the action quickly. When it does, it's going to be an amazing show. For now, it's just pretty good.
How I Met Your Mother - B+
It could be argued that the girls were given no substantial storyline, but we liked their commentary on the various drinks and their affects. We also love Marshall falling in love with himself in the mirror
The United States of Tara - C+
The end was wonderfully creepy, but the rest of the episode was dull. Sweet moments between Tara and her husband though, which is something we like to see after all they went through last season.
Gossip Girl - B-
Does anyone else think this prince came out of thin air? He and Blair didn't really get along in France and now they are in love/engaged? Insane. Even more insane was having Chuck almost hit Blair. Was he aiming for the window to scare her or was he aiming for her head? Good job, Nate, for dumping him. We are pretty sure Russell Thorpe is the one who killed Raina's mom though. Why else would he lie to Raina about her fate?
Glee - B+
We loved the Fleetwood Mac songs. Leeard called Sam's secret from the get-go. We love Santana more and more every episode. Brittany too. Sam's siblings are so cute too.
Because of last week's South Park, we will be watching The Human Centipede together. We hear it is the nastiest thing ever. We will let you know. It's on Instant Netflix, and as we've said before, we will watch anything on Instant Netflix.
Place your bets on who will get grossed out and turn it off first.