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Friday, April 29, 2011

The Office - Goodbye, Michael Scott

Photo credit- jeffdoe. This episode was surprisingly touching. With the mean-spirited handling of Michael at times during this series, we half expected the show to kill Michael off or do something else darkly funny.

Let’s go to the chat. We’ve had to write enough posts today, haha.

Leeard (10:36:38 AM): I'm seriously sobbing. Have you seen The Office yet?
Ern (10:36:46 AM): No. I’ll turn it on in a minute. The Office is sad?
Leeard (10:36:54 AM): Big, fat racking sobs
Ern (10:36:58 AM): Wow
Leeard (10:37:05 AM): Well, it's Michael's last episode!
Ern (10:37:15 AM): Nooooo. Too soon.
Leeard (10:37:32 AM): I knooooooow! I started crying from the very beginning
Ern (10:44:23 AM): You're a crazy person
Leeard (10:44:32 AM): It's his last episode!! It’s sad!!
Ern (10:48:50 AM): Did you watch South Park?
Leeard (10:48:56 AM): Yes. And I am forever disturbed.
Ern (10:49:43 AM): Ok, Office time
Leeard (10:51:18 AM): Full. Baby. Sobs.
Ern (10:51:32 AM): Lameo
Leeard (10:51:50 AM): If you don't even tear up, I don't think I want to be your friend
Ern (10:51:58 AM): We will see, and too bad, you will have to be my friend anyway
Leeard (10:56:21 AM): WOW I haven't cried that hard in a while
Ern (10:57:07 AM): Six minutes in and still not crying
Leeard (10:57:18 AM): That's fine
Leeard (11:00:29 AM): Ugh I hate crying headaches
Ern (11:00:38 AM): CRYING HEADACHES? What the **** are those?
Leeard (11:00:51 AM): .... the headache you get after crying?
Ern (11:01:06 AM): That sounds like an illness. I’ve never had that.
Leeard (11:01:18 AM): Then you've never cried really hard.
Ern (11:01:26 AM): Yes, I have
Leeard (11:02:19 AM):
Ern (11:03:27 AM): Yet another reason to suck it up after you indulge the first four tears or so
Leeard (11:03:52 AM): Um no, letting it out is a lot better than bottling it up inside
Ern (11:04:11 AM): You can dance it out
Leeard (11:04:28 AM): Maybe YOU can
Ern (11:04:36 AM): I can and I do. It isn’t pretty though, because I suck at dancing. I love Creed. He needs more airtime. I’m feeling bad for Gabe, surprisingly.
Leeard (11:08:54 AM): meh
Ern (11:09:16 AM): Toby found Michael another Toby! It IS a dark ending!
Leeard (11:09:23 AM): Ha, I know
Ern (11:11:33 AM): Did you cry when Michael tried to make that basket? Because that was painful.
Leeard (11:11:36 AM): Ha no
Ern (11:14:28 AM): You don't need a mom, because you have my number
Leeard (11:15:15 AM): Did you even tear up at that part?
Ern (11:15:34 AM): No, not even a little.
(Time passes while we argue about the iPhone, etc)
Ern (11:25:19 AM): Why is Jim crying over Michael? I didn’t know he liked him that much.

Ern must say, the feeling you get when you almost tear up (the pre-tearing, we guess you could say), came around as Michael took off his microphone and walked off to board his plane. It was really sweet that Pam made it too. Leeard was yelling at the screen about that until Pam shower up at the airport. Sweet episode. And Deangelo’s battle with the cake was great. He needs to be gone soon though.

Episode grade: B+

Bye Michael. Catch you on the flippity flop.

Grey's Anatomy - It's a Long Way Back

We’re starting to hate Teddy. No offense to the actress, but she’s too harsh-looking. Ladies, as you get older, it actually helps to not be stick-skinny. You need some meat in your face. Also, Teddy is not teaching Cristina, which is the point of Teddy’s existence, as far as we are concerned. How big can your ego get? And finally, she keeps stopping by Scott Foley’s apartment after her dates with other men. Why does she do that? Predictably, the therapist who helped the staff with their trauma from last year’s finale is back to pick things up with Teddy again. This will form a love triangle, but since no one likes Teddy or the therapist, and Scott Foley is probably on his way off the show, we are pretty sure this isn’t Derek/Meredith/Addison part two or anything. WHY?

Another “why” is WHY did the show name Callie/Arizona/Mark’s baby Sofia. That name (and variations of that name) is hugely popular right now. It’s as common as baby “Ashleys” were in 1987. Way to just pander to the audience and not be creative, show.

This episode spanned 12 weeks. After a stupid fake-out scare during Sofia’s heart surgery, we found out that the baby is fine and is going to live. After some sobbing and other histrionics, Callie took her home. It was really cute how the residents snuck her out of her hospital room to see Sofia for the first time though. And it was cool how Stark let Arizona be in the operating room. We loved when Cristina told Callie that the baby wasn’t cute yet. Basically, we loved how the storyline brought out stuff in the other characters.

Meredith and Derek finally let Adele into their trial. Meredith, feeling compassion for Adele and a duty to do all she could for the chief, swapped the placebo that Adele was intended to receive and put in the real drug. Uh oh…might there be consequences for that? It’s been too long since Meredith was in hot water. We don’t really care about Adele though. We don’t like the way the actress plays her and we actually don’t respect her for pretending she didn’t know about Richard’s affair for 20 years.

The storyline we didn’t like, but we know is just an excuse for Meredith to adopt a black baby? Alex trying to become chief resident by flying young African kids for surgeries. He set up the program with no way to pay for it, committing fraud. This is so not like Alex to be that stupid. That’s an Izzie move. If he had gone to jail, we would have felt no sympathy. Fortunately, the mean old lady he was treating died and left him $200,000. He was extremely inappropriate with that woman. We don’t approve.

Also, Stark is particularly cold toward April for not being romantically interested in him. And that’s why you don’t lead a single guy on, go out on dates with him, or hang out with him excessively if you don’t want him romantically. That’s pretty much what the guy is thinking about, even the airhead girl is thinking, “We’re just good FRIENDS.” Save yourself the awkwardness. There are plenty of hot guys to be friends with.

We call this episode a filler.

Thus, episode grade: C+

South Park - The HumanCentiPad

Was South Park too disgusting this week?

Kyle’s mouth was fastened to the anus of an Asian man, and a woman’s mouth was, in turn, surgically fastened to Kyle’s anus. When the Asian man ate, well, you know. This was a scheme by Apple to turn the three humans into a hot new device that would put their newest iPad to shame. The HumancentiPad. This is a parody of the movie The Human Centipede, which was also nasty.

The episode was pretty gross. Leeard almost vomited. But Ern laughed hysterically and loved it.

Kyle hit “accept” on an iTunes update’s “Terms and Conditions” without reading it. Who does? He signed over his rights to not be turned into the humancentiPad. Because of Apple’s location technology, the company was able to track him down, kidnap him, and force him to deliver. Mr. Broflovski had to go with Kyle’s friends to the Apple store “Geniuses” to get his son back. The parody of the nerds working there was pretty great.

The whole time, both of us were thinking, “Wow, Kyle’s dad is a terrible lawyer.” Contracts made with minors are voidable. Plus, those standard form contracts that you have to accept or you don’t get to use a product aren’t as enforceable as you think, especially if they get ridiculous. The courts will side with the consumer. But we digress.

The funniest plot for us was Cartman’s need of an iPad. His mother would only by him a Toshiba Handibook, so Cartman accused his mother of…uh…screwing him. Only not that word. When Cartman’s chance to own the Kyle-Pad device fell through when Kyle’s dad got his son back. Cartman accused God of the same thing he accused his mother of, so God struck him on the butt with a bolt of lightning.

Leeard did not think that the episode parodied recent enough things. The prank Apple pulled on the terms & conditions was last year, as was The Human Centipede. Ern loved it, because she’s not a huge fan of Apple. The iTunes store gyps you. Let us introduce you to a little thing called “Amazon MP3 Store.” It goes right into your iTunes, it’s cheaper, and you can transfer it to your computer without having to authorize the computer. Ern would take a Mac though…. That’s a special note for the random millionaire who might read this blog and wants to treat us :)

Leeard’s grade: B-
Ern’s grade: A-

The Vampire Diaries - The Last Day recap/review

Photo credit to Biddi2. We are so in love with Damon after this episode. We love what this storyline is doing to him. But will he transform into too much of a good guy as the show goes on? We kind of like him as an angsty jerk. It’s entertaining. He pretty much sacrificed himself to Klaus for the chance of getting Elena back (by telling Klaus that his plan was caput). But was it? No. Because this show doesn’t make things that easy. And we love it for that.

Rewind to the beginning. Elijah’s plan to save Elena’s life involves a potion created by witches a loooong time ago. If Elena drinks it before the ritual, even though Klaus will drink all her blood and kill her, the potion will bring her back to life. We were skeptical, because that seems too easy. Plus, that sounds like something Elijah would just make up to get his way. Even Elijah admitted that the potion might not still work. Stefan and Elena want to believe in the potion, so they do. Damon went nuts. He doesn’t believe in Santa Claus.

Elena went to comfort Damon, and Damon forced her to drink his blood. Stefan came in and the two brothers fought. Damon stabbed Stefan in the stomach and ran off. Elena was angry. We think this is a pretty fool-proof plan though. When Klaus drinks Elena up and she dies, she will just come back as a vampire. Go Damon. But Elena wanted to grow up, have kids, and live a partially normal life, so it looks like she is going to have trouble forgiving Damon. We loved her reaction to this. It was heartbreaking, true, and very mature. You forget that she’s 17 until she verbally reminds you. Stefan tried to be comforting.

Klaus’ new witch pushed Carol Lockwood down the stairs to get Tyler back to Mystic Falls. It worked. Jules brought Tyler back to visit Mommy in the hospital. Leeard literally screamed “Tyler’s back!” in her apartment. Ern is still mad at him for hesitating to save Caroline. Neither of us has missed Jules at all, and this episode gives us hope that she will be dead soon. Klaus’ team captured Caroline and Tyler to be the sacrifices. Damon went to the bar and sulked about how he lost Elena’s respect…again. But then he decides to free Klaus’ vampire and werewolf sacrifices so that Klaus has to postpone the sacrifice. Then the blood will leave her system and they can go back to the Santa Claus plan Elena and Elijah had. He found out where Klaus was keeping his victims by asking Katherine. They were being kept in the tomb (of course).

Matt, meanwhile, has stopped working with Sheriff Mommy and has started to believe that vampire Caroline is still the Caroline he loves. When he found out that Caroline had been caught, he showed up at the tomb carrying a shotgun with wooden bullets. He shot Klaus’ witch as the witch was confronting Damon. NICE. Matt is so much hotter now (which we thought wasn't possible). Damon knocked him out, saved Caroline and Tyler (who made up, by the way), revived Matt, and ran away with the three younglings.

As they ran, Tyler started to turn into a werewolf. He bit Damon, mid-transformation. We guess this means that we get to find out how a werewolf bite is cured, because there is no way that Damon is dying. Matt and Caroline locked themselves in the Lockwood basement where Tyler transformed last time, in order to protect themselves. Klaus had already taken Elena. Damon went to Klaus’ apartment to tell him that his plan was ruined, but of course Klaus had a plan B. Werewolf B? Jules. Vampire B? Not Damon, because of the werewolf bite rendering him useless in Klaus’ plans. It’s Jenna, who is in transition. WHOA. Our minds were effectively blown. Only two episodes left....

Episode Grade: A. Obviously.

Questions: Are you as excited for the finale as we are? Does Elena’s impending vampirism take away most of the sacrifice’s risk? I mean, who cares about Jenna and Jules dying? Do you think the show would make Elena a vampire this early in the series? Will Katherine die this season? And why does Damon EVER wear a shirt?

America's Next Top Model 4/27/11

We've gotten more hits from the search "America’s Next Top Model, Alexandria" than just about anything for the last month, so we get the message. Our readers want an ANTM post. You're right, it's been too long.

Goodbye to Kasia. Not that it was a surprise. We have complained before that this show gives away who they are going to kick off by showing them bragging about their talents in their talking heads. The winner of this show is almost never seen boasting in a talking head. This means that we can rule out Alexandria as a winner. But we are still rooting for her, because this show needs an upset FOR ONCE.

We suspect that the show asks the girls questions to get them talking in their interviews. They want to paint the winner as likeable so the audience will accept the winner. They probably asked Kasia a simple question like, “What are your strengths? What are the things that would make you beat the other girls, if you did.” They all answer. If they are to be America’s Next Top Model, their answers are stored in Tyra’s vault. If they are not, the viewers get to see these responses before the girls are sent home.

They are also pumping forgettable Hannah. We are envisioning a Brittani or Hannah win. Because of Alexandria’s popularity and drama potential, she will be in the top three and maybe even the top two. This show never picks the bitchy girl. If Alexandria actually won, it would be a shock, and we would like the show more.

We are forgetting someone. Oh, Molly. Molly, Molly, Molly. So pretty and a decent model. But she has such a bad attitude, and she has had it from day one. She says it’s because she’s adopted. We don’t really mind her. Usually when she complains, we agree with her. But you can’t win the show with a ‘tude like that.

The girls’ house in Morocco is gorgeous. Who cares if you have to share a bed? Seriously, that just became our dream house. The photo shoot involves the girls in the desert, original for Morocco, on camels, in fabulous Aladdin-style clothing. Molly got best photo, but Brittani also did well. Hannah does alright. Alexandria and Kasia stink up the joint. Alexandria didn’t click with the photographer, so she got accused of directing the photo shoot. Um, she was directing herself. Not fair this time, but the judges fear the trend of Alexandria coming across badly on set.

Some woman from Vogue sits on the judging panel. Yeah, we don’t care enough to look her name up. We don’t care enough about fashion that we will never be able to afford unless we are a) really rich one day and b) greedy, vain douchebags. We watch this show for the hilarity. Although we never say no to the cute stuff they sell at Target. Can we get an Amen? Like we said in the beginning, Kasia goes home.

Episode Grade: A-

Also, if you want to see America's Next Top Model pictures from the photo shoots of this year and years past, we like to go here. It looks like they posted some of the photos from next week, so tread carefully if you don't want spoilers. Or try to pick the girl going home from the pictures. We think Alexandria has the best market photo. Is it Hannah or Brittani's time to go?

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Casey Went Home

Casey will not be the next American Idol. It should have been Lusk. :(

Leeard is sad, but Ern has seen this coming since the top 12. And he has been voted off once.

Still, it should have been Lusk.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Glee - Born This Way recap/review

During a Glee dance rehearsal, Finn breaks Rachel’s nose. Rachel’s doctor suggests that she get a nose job, because it might make her prettier and allow her to get more air down so that she can be a better singer. Is that possible? Because we’re pretty sure her voice can’t be improved. It’s one of the greatest things our ears have ever had the pleasure of being exposed to. On that note, more Rachel singing please, show. And another Rachel/Blaine duet is a must.

Rachel falls for it though and announces to the Glee club that she’s getting a nose job. Santana gives her take, which is that if you don’t like something about yourself you should change it. She also described what she thinks are the physical deficiencies of the rest of the Glee club. Our favorite line? “Maybe Rachel’s fine with having an enormous beak. Maybe she needs it to crack hard seeds.” Is this an anti-bullying show or a show that bullies for laughs and then hypocritically denounces it? We don’t care, because Santana is funny. And she’s keeping it real.

This shocks Will, and he points out that the things we like to change are the most interesting parts. He meets with Emma for ideas, and she utters the words “born this way,” so he thinks he needs to bring Gaga back to the show. Emma expresses discomfort with the term OCD, even though she is clearly OCD, and Will thinks she needs to accept it.

Santana, meanwhile, plots to become prom queen so that she could get Brittany to date her. She resolves to lock down the “jock block.” She deems Sam too unpopular to pull it off for her (although his Sean Connery was very funny, and we love how nerdy he is), so she sets her sights on Karofsky, just after noticing that he is gay when he walked past her and checked out Sam's butt. She decides to use this knowledge to get Kurt back to McKinley High so that she could become the hero everyone would vote for.

Will announces that this week’s assignment is “acceptance,” namely, self-acceptance. The kids were to sing Lady Gaga, the so-called “queen of self-acceptance” and they also had to make white t-shirts with a word or phrase on them that they have been mocked for, but is part of who they are. We have a problem with Gaga being labeled the “queen of self-acceptance,” because of how she treats her body. We love us some Gaga, own her songs, and would kill to go to her concert, but we don’t like the way she buys into the weight-loss thing. Also, she has confessed to doing cocaine. If you respect your body, you don’t destroy it. Pop stars SHOULD eat. She’s molding her body to fit the norm so that she can be as famous as possible. It’s a good career tactic, but it’s not self-acceptance.

Will was disappointed that Emma put “Ginger” on her shirt when she should have put OCD. Well, Will, we are made at you for not putting “Horrible Rapper” on your shirt. So there. Zizes and Puck start conspiring to make Zizes prom queen rather than Quinn. Rachel takes Quinn to her plastic surgeon so that he can make mock-ups of what Rachel will look like with Quinn’s nose. They sing a mash-up of TLC’s “Unpretty” and “I Feel Pretty” from West Side Story, which are both good songs. We liked this number. Every girl has felt both extremes, no matter what they look like, and we think that duet would resonate with the audience. Including TLC gets an automatic A from Leeard, and this is one of her favorite songs.

Quinn and Zizes get into it over who should be prom queen, and things got a little personal. Santana confronts Karofsky about being gay and he crumbles. Favorite character status reached. They reach a deal to become each other’s beards and win prom king and queen. “The only straight I am is straight-up bitch,” Santana said, threatening to out Karofsky if he didn’t play along. Oh Santana, don’t you think it’s weird to have a prom queen who looks 40 years old? Santana makes a plan to implement an anti-bullying movement at the school and convinces Karofsky to apologize to Kurt so that Kurt can feel safe to come back to the school.

Finn sings Sammy Davis Jr.’s “I Gotta Be Me,” and it was surprisingly not terrible. A fun number. Not a favorite though and it went on a little too long. Rachel shows the Glee club the compositions of her with a small nose. We thought it looked really awkward, and no one in the Glee club thought it “looked like her.” Finn said, “Rachel, please don’t do this. You’re beautiful.” Quinn was not a fan of that statement.

Will convinces Emma to see a shrink (hats off to Will, for once), and the shrink gives her a pill and sets an appointment for next week. Glee addresses the stigma of mental illness. What social cause can this show pick up next? Santana and Karofsky personally start enforcing the no-bullying rule, so Kurt is able to come back to McKinley. His condition is that he and Karofsky start a chapter of PFLAG at the school so that Karofsky can be educated about gay people. The Warblers show up and sing Kurt goodbye. It’s “Somewhere Only We Know,” and it’s a wonderful rendition, but we weren’t crazy about the placement or the staging. It just could have been used better, especially since the vocals were great.

Kurt sings Barbra’s “As If We Never Said Goodbye,” and it’s one of our favorite songs by him. We love when he does big Broadway numbers. It fit really well and it was sweet. Kurt has gotten better at singing this season. We feel like we are really starting to see all the Glee gay rights and anti-bullying stuff pay off emotionally with this episode. Side note: We kind of like Karofsky’s dad. There are a lot of great dads on this show.

Zizes and Puck dredge up a middle school yearbook showing that Quinn wasn’t born beautiful. She was chubby and big-nosed, and her name was Lucy. Also, she had dark hair, braces, and glasses. Poor Quinn! She got into sports, got a nose job, and reinvented herself. Zizes papers the entire school with the truth. This makes us like and understand Quinn more. It can be hell to be ugly and unpopular in middle or high school. Puck takes Rachel to the mall to meet Kurt where people dance to Duck Soup’s “Barbra Streisand,” which convinces Rachel to not get a nose job. Hated that. We really liked this storyline, and we wish it had ended more subtly and poignantly.

Finn is sweet to Quinn about the Lucy thing. The people of the school like that she used to be ugly, so Quinn is still in the running for prom queen after all. Zizes apologizes to Quinn for what she did. Brittany and Santana have a sweet moment. Will reveals that he is self-conscious about his “butt chin” by putting that on his shirt. The gang sings Lady Gaga’s "Born This Way". It’s a great homage to the song and it make us like the song better. This episode was a lot better than last week’s.

Did you like the episode too? What would your t-shirt say? Do you think Kurt’s hair was a little too crazy in places?

Episode Grade: A-

Monday, April 25, 2011

Game of Thrones Episode 2

We must say, this series has got to be a lot better if you HAVEN’T read the books. And unless you have the time on your hands, the series might be a better option for you. The books are Long with a capital “L.” One of us has read them and wishes she knew there was going to be a TV series.

We love to read, but TV is so much easier. It’s a pretty high compliment to this series that we can say that it’s equal to the books because, while a little slow, they are pretty good.

“I love when people say that they don’t have a TV and that they read. I say, ‘I have you seen TV? It’s much better.” – Jim Gaffigan.

What happened this week? About 100 pages worth of stuff, and it wasn’t all that earth-shattering. Lots of people were upset by the ending, but we’ll get to that. We’ve decided that this show demands at least short recaps, because it gets complex later, and everything seems to happen so quietly unless it’s violence or sex.

We’re not digging the show’s treatment of the Daenerys storyline so far. The book actually had less forced doggy-style sex between Daenerys and her new husband. What she did last night (making the sex good for herself), she did right away. She was into it. Maybe HBO just couldn’t resist messed-up titillation? Like rape and women practicing sex on each other. But we are glad to see that the rape portion of this storyline is over. Daenerys gets way cooler. She’s not a victim, and we don’t like to see her portrayed that way.

Catelyn Stark, meanwhile, moans and groans about her husband leaving to be the king’s hand, and then dredges up the past by talking about his bastard son. You know, just to make their farewell special. Eddard Stark leaves with fat King Robert, taking his daughters, Arya and Sansa.

Catelyn refuses to leave Bran. Bran survived being pushed out the window, but he lies in his bed, unconscious and recovering. Obviously, the incestuous Lannisters want him dead before he wakes up and talks about how they do the nasty when no one is looking. So they sent an assassin to kill Bran. Catelyn Stark and Bran’s direwolf fight the assassin off/kill him together. Catelyn figures out who done it, and she decides to ride to her husband to warn him that the Lannisters are evil. Before the end of the episode, Bran wakes up.

Because Jon Snow is Eddard’s bastard, his destiny is to go serve on the Wall. The Wall is sort of a barrier between Eddard’s kingdom and the wilderness were all sorts of nasty is rumored to live. We know the rumors are true, because of the first scene of the first episode where a bunch of people got beheaded. Tyrion the Lannister dwarf (and Ern’s favorite character) decides to ride with Jon and check out the wall. Tyrion and Jon seem to be making friends. Riding with them are a bunch of criminals. They could choose between castration and serving at the Wall for life, and they chose the Wall, an uncommon choice. The Wall must really suck.

During the trip to King’s Landing (where King Robert lives, duh), Prince Joffrey tries to woo Sansa. It’s easy. Sansa is kind of lame at this point in the story. While walking together and drinking booze, Sansa and Joffrey came across Arya practicing sword-fighting with a butcher’s son. Joffrey decides to mock them. He challenges the butcher’s son to a duel, even though Joffrey has a real sword and the other boy has a stick. Arya protests, everyone gets into a surprisingly bad ass fight (as it’s between children). But then things get too serious when Arya’s direwolf takes a chunk out of Joffrey’s arm.

Joffrey took it like your average spoiled brat, crying in the dirt. Arya sent her direwolf away, and Sansa’s direwolf had to be killed by Eddard Stark to appease Cersei Lannister, Joffrey’s mom. Totally unfair.

And all the people watching apparently freaked out that a dog was killed on the show. We’ve heard several people say that they would rather see a human killed than an animal. We disagree. If the off-screen, fictional killing of a dog is too much for you, then you might want to steer clear of this show. The deaths and shockers haven’t even begun yet.

But this show is going to be around for a while, so we think that anyone remotely interested should get into it.

Episode grade: B+