Wow, We've Been Bad Bloggers - Here's What We've Been Doing

We have watched/read a few things and have no energy to really write about them in depth. So we’ll give some short takes.

Tsotsi - Rented this African redemption story and like it, overall, but felt that it was overrated. We were also unsatisfied with the ending. It was really short, and we are fans of 90-minute movies if there is no reason for it to be longer. Why drag things on if you don’t need the time to give the movie its punch? And it's entertaining. Movie Grade: B
Two Lovers - Tell us, why were these women after this guy? He needs to get over his own depression before he takes any lovers at all. This one was forgettable, but well-acted. Movie Grade: C+
Source Code - Good and twisty. Leeard liked this one more than Ern did. It depressed Ern. She cared about the characters and didn't feel satisfied with how everything turned out. Movie Grade: B+

13 Reasons Why - In this young adult novel, a young girl commits suicide and sends tapes to the people who had a hand in the events that drove her to her death, explaining why she died. The first half leaves you thinking, “Why did she kill herself? Yeah, she had no real friends, but that’s not that bad.” If you make it through the first half, you get to the emotional, revelatory second half that comes through. By the time the mysteries unravel, you will be invested enough to care. We recommend the audiobook for this one, but the regular book is fine. We liked the protagonist too. We recommend this book to teens and others who want a reminder that they don’t know what’s going on in the heads of others and should reach out to the people they don’t normally talk to. Book Grade: A-

Ghost Story by Jim Butcher - If you haven’t read The Dresden Files, this isn’t the book to start with. If you’ve seen the TV series, know that the books are a lot better. If you’ve only read the first couple of books, know that the series gets better and more fun as Butcher gets the writing and story-crafting practice. By book 13 (this book), Butcher knows what he’s doing and is at the top of the urban fantasy heap. The main character spends this book dead, but that doesn’t stop the story, action, or character development, and we think that’s quite a feat. This is a sad, introspective one with an ending we liked. We liked that the main character questioned his very harmful decisions and we can’t wait for the next book that will probably come out in a year or so. It's impressive that a book series has gone on this long and still retains the quality of its best entries. Book Grade: B+

Love and Other Drugs - Leeard said this movie was “meh.” After arguing and trying to think differently, Ern has to agree. This is a mature, realistic love story that follows the chick-flick formula and juggles too many subplots that we don’t care about. The thing is, people who would go see this movie are chick flick lovers. They are looking for cute, funny, and opportunities to swoon. You won’t find that there. Movie Grade: C

Breaking Bad tomorrow!

Pretty Little Liars: Surface Tension review

Well, this is about a million years late, but better late than never, right? This week on Pretty Little Liars opened with Emily moving in with Hanna and Ashley Marin. They got some candy and a note from A.

Leeard (8:02:35 PM): A is the best
Ern (8:03:18 PM): It was nice of him/her to send a housewarming gift. Here’s something NO ONE is thinking: What if A has an altruistic motive that will be revealed later? What if A is using dirty means to a nice end? Is that possible?
Leeard (8:04:39 PM): I don't think it's IMPOSSIBLE. I just feel like: I’m hoping the end game is finding Ali’s real killer, if she is even dead. So, I do think one of the end results of all A’s s*** will be…cathartic? I don’t think A’s, like, altruistic though.
Ern (8:06:28 PM): I'm hoping that the end game of this SEASON is finding Ali's real killer, even if she is dead. I'm hoping A is up to something bigger (and I hope A is bad, I was just bringing up the possibility).
Leeard (8:07:01 PM): I think the girls' end game is finding Ali's killer. Like, I think they'll be satisfied once they have a real answer about that (other than finding out who A is).
Leeard (8:07:48 PM): Emily is the best
Ern (8:07:50 PM): Hey! I think the end of season two or three should end with Aria's death. The show can survive and thrive with just three of the friends.
Leeard (8:08:07 PM): I don't think so
Ern (8:08:19 PM): You don't think it can or should? Because I know it WON'T
Leeard (8:08:23 PM): Both
Ern (8:08:25 PM): But it would be beyond shocking
Leeard (8:08:34 PM): Yes, but I don’t think I’d like it.

Emily started living with Hanna and Ashley Marin, and Hanna’s a little too fun for Emily’s taste. She sings while she does her homework, dances, and makes jokes, while Emily just wants to be sweet and quiet and study in the shared room. If Ern and Leeard ever roomed together, we could totally see that happening. Ern does not study and Leeard does. And Ern has to run her mouth 90 miles per hour every day.

Leeard (8:20:25 PM): Love. Hanna.
Ern (8:20:52 PM): Hanna is so much better than the person singing (I think it’s Ke$ha).
Leeard (8:21:23 PM): Hanna is so much better than most people, just, in general.
Ern (8:21:56 PM): I wonder if Emily wears fake eyelashes on this show?
Leeard (8:22:11 PM): I want Spencer’s hair
Ern (8:22:34 PM): I'd rather have the hair of any of the other girls. Spencer's is a little thin and mousy. It's just styled to hell
Leeard (8:23:19 PM): When I say I want her hair, I usually mean that I want her hair style. I have curly hair, but I wish it were tamed like hers.
Ern (8:23:49 PM): It's called product
Leeard (8:23:56 PM): I use product, anus
Ern (8:24:07 PM): Not the right product, apparently.
Leeard (8:24:17 PM): I just don’t blow dry my hair. My hair doesn’t air dry prettily like hers.
Ern (8:24:34 PM): I don’t know how to blow my hair dry and make it look good. Just getting it dry takes too long.

Hanna found out that Caleb broke into the DMV’s web site for some criminal types and then got out of the deal. The criminals were upset when Caleb scrammed and Caleb is still worried about that. So when Hanna pressured him to “go legit” and do his business in the open or get a real job, Caleb had to tell her about his beyond-sketchy internet past. We’re pretty sure that this criminal past is going to come back to haunt Caleb, especially since they talked about it in Hanna’s room. A seems to know everything about the girls. Is it a stretch to think that those rooms are bugged? Then Hanna and Emily saw Hanna’s parents stumble in drunk, late at night, probably about to have sex.

Ern (8:12:19 PM): I love that Caleb and Hanna's little altercation there didn't end in a big fight
Leeard (8:12:40 PM): And I'm actually okay with their "altercation"
Ern (8:12:52 PM): Me too
Leeard (8:12:56 PM): He was pretty cool about Hanna getting involved with his foster mom thing
Ern (8:12:57 PM): She shouldn't fight all of his battles. I was surprised at how cool he was about that
Leeard (8:13:18 PM): Me too. And impressed.
Ern (8:35:52 PM): Too bad this is abc family. I’d watch a Hanna/Caleb sex scene
Leeard (8:36:21 PM): Read fanfic.

Ezra and Jason came over to Aria’s house for a dinner party held by her parents. A cop showed up and told Aria’s dad that Mike was caught breaking into a house.

Leeard (8:36:47 PM): ooooooooooooooooh, Mike. What an artard.
Ern (8:37:08 PM): Oh noooo. Interrupting the Jason/Ezra collision of my dreams?!!! Darn you, Mike!!!
Leeard (8:37:24 PM): Please, that's not going to happen this episode
Ern (8:37:26 PM): I deem him King Emperor Artardius, the third, after you and me, obviously.
Leeard (8:37:42 PM): I'm not a king emperor

We are pretty sure Jason has figured out that something is going on between Aria and Ezra. There was a little bit of tension between them, and Ezra looked jealous when he saw Aria and Jason sitting together, talking. Jason is also going a long way toward winning Aria’s parents over. Also, we have to say, Jason is looking tasty lately.

Ern (8:10:49 PM): Ezra, get your catfish face off the show

We saw some flashbacks of Jason and Alison fighting. Jason pretended that he was about to hit Alison with a hockey stick. Spencer shouted, “Careful!”

Ern (8:34:18 PM): Please, my brother and I pretend to hit each other with stuff like that all the time. Spencer needs to chill. And I really doubt that stick is the murder weapon. It’s another red herring.

For some reason, Mrs. Montgomery and Mrs. Marin think that Mr. Hasting (Spencer’s dad) is hiding something because he is the one who wanted all of the girls separated and in therapy. The two moms resolve to be more involved in the weirdness going on. It’s about time, ladies. Toby was busy doing some contracting work in Mr. Hasting’s yard.

Leeard (8:13:28 PM): Toby is so cuuuuuuuuuuuuuute. As much as I LOVE him with Spencer, and I do, I agree with you. I don’t think they will be together long-term. Dear Papa Spence, please don’t steal Toby’s contracting ideas or something.

While working, Toby found the aforementioned hockey stick. It said “Hastings” on it.

Ern (8:25:32 PM): I'm kind of bored right now, watching this
Leeard (8:25:42 PM): I think things might get interesting
Ern (8:25:43 PM): Is that a sword?
Leeard (8:25:53 PM): I’m pretty sure it's a field hockey stick
Ern (8:26:26 PM): You would know, sports fan
Leeard (8:26:46 PM): I mean, I’m not an artard, so .... yeah
Ern (8:27:35 PM): I beg to differ on that artard portion of the argument
Leeard (8:28:22 PM): Ugh I know. You not knowing what it is doesn’t make you an artard.
Ern (8:28:55 PM): No, I'm saying YOU'RE an artard. Not that I’m not one.
Leeard (8:32:45 PM): Field hockey. I’m good
Ern (8:32:53 PM): Yep

Spencer’s dad freaked out and burned the hockey stick, not wanting suspicion to fall on Spencer again. Spencer protested, but her dad wanted all of the drama to be over, and he sort of thinks that Spencer is loony and possibly actually involved in all the sketchiness.

Ern (8:16:36 PM): I feel really bad for Spencer. It sucks to have someone in your family really misunderstand you. I feel like these girls should try harder to tell their parents about A. Maybe not Aria, because she has a lot to lose with the Ezra thing. Or Hannah, because of her mom’s felony. But Emily and Spencer should say something if someone really dangerous is out and about.
Leeard (8:17:35 PM): Emily can be forced to move to Texas. Spencer can lose her family if they find out about the ring.
Ern (8:18:04 PM): Is that worse than hiding evidence from the police or letting A do...whatever is next? I think they would forgive Spencer pretty quickly if they knew the whole story.
Leeard (8:18:23 PM): That Spencer “borrowed” Melissa’s ring to buy a truck for Toby? Really? Also, what evidence are they hiding now that the police would listen to?
Ern (8:18:45 PM): I think the A thing would trump the pawning thing. It would overshadow it. Spencer’s parents were rich and Ian was a douche. They would just agree not to tell Melissa and move on with it. The girls could tell their whole story and the fact that they saw the rest of the video with Ian and Alison?
Leeard (8:18:55 PM): Okay, they saw it. What proof is that? The police don’t trust them. No one would trust them.
Ern (8:19:05 PM): If it were me, my mom would believe me. I probably wouldn't want her to go right to the police. I would want her to help me think it out or set a trap for A.

Finally, Aria went through Mike’s stolen stuff and found one of Jenna’s creations from pottery class. She confronted Mike (“You stole from a blind girl!”) and he said that he got the item from Cop Garrett’s house. Aria realized that Jenna and Garrett have a thing and that the cop is not to be trusted. Aria texted Spencer the news, but Spencer was already in Garrett’s car, opening up to him about all of the weirdness and about to share her theories as to who really killed Alison since Ian didn’t. She contacted him because she needed to hear the cops' theory on what the murder weapon was, so that she could rule out the hockey stick, if possible.

Ern (8:44:20 PM): YES YES YES all my dreams. BE JEALOUS EZRA, THEN GO DIE.
Leeard (8:44:50 PM): I don't think he's going to die on the show
Ern (8:44:57 PM): Good, because then we would have to sit through all of the characters mourning him. He needs to leave the show/town in disgrace and then die offscreen, in my imagination. I'm gonna start refering to Ezra as "Mr. Felch."
Leeard (8:45:31 PM): Mmmmmmmmmkay. I really love Aria’s dress. HELL YES! Garrett. Finally they know.
Ern (8:57:10 PM): YES YES YES YES
Leeard (8:57:14 PM): YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Ern (8:57:18 PM): officer friendly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Leeard (8:57:36 PM): FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!! S***! Nonononononononono
Ern (8:58:06 PM): nospencerstupidhead
Leeard (8:58:23 PM): spencergetoutofthecar. spencerstoptalking. saypeaceoutsucker. GETOUTOFTHECAR. WHATTHEF***?
Ern (9:00:13 PM): !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Leeard (9:00:14 PM): Well, it sure looks like A will be poisoning Emily
Ern (9:00:20 PM): Nice. Finally some action

Episode grade: B

Breaking Bad- Thirty-Eight Snub discussion

Oh Walter. We’ve stopped lamenting your descent into bad guy territory and are now just lamenting your incompetence. The show is highlighting it, showing Walt trying to draw a gun quickly out of his jacket. Who knew that was hard?

This episode’s first half was pretty slow. The show is really milking the aftermath of the last two episodes by showing us how miserable the characters are because of what happened. Walt is all paranoid (rightly so), buying a gun on the black market, and trying to see Gus so that he can kill him. All he gets is a light ass kicking courtesy of Mike, who is still awesome.

Skyler tried to buy the car wash, but the owner named a ludicrous price because of the way Walter quit. We forgot that Walt “grabbed himself” out of spite. That was funny. On another note, we love Skyler’s business acumen.

Jesse spent the episode partying and trying to keep his friends in the mood to “kick harder than a sensei.” Finally, they got tired. Jesse asked one of his friends, "Where are you going?” The friend (who has a name that we don’t care about) replied, "Home, I haven't slept in three straight days." Jesse: "I have the floor space. Crash here." Friend: "Yeah, but I have this cat. I think I'm supposed to feed it." Jesse: "Whatever, you little bitch."

Andrea showed up at Jesse’s house during the middle of the party with a wad of cash that Jesse had dropped off. Jesse told her to spend the money to get herself and her son out of their bad neighborhood. At the end of the episode, Jesse sat in front of his speaker (that was playing some gangster rap) to try to drown out his life. This didn’t seem to work, because he had his “Jesse’s breaking down” face on. This is the face that always makes us think, “Dude, Aaron Paul can ACT” and “Poor Jesse!” at the same time.

We only recently developed an admiration for Hank, but he is making us dislike him again with the way he is treating Marie. We almost dislike Marie just as much for letting him. Just because he’s sick doesn’t mean she has to take it. Marie, take a geode, throw it at Hank’s…other geodes, and walk away flipping him the bird. That will show him. Or she can just sleep Hank’s physical therapist. Yum.

The questions now are: Will Mike realize that Gus is untrustworthy after he killed Victor, a loyal follower? Will he kill Gus or help Walter kill Gus? How sweet can Jesse get before he just turns into a straight-up good guy? Will Skyler get the car wash or will they have to go back to the laser tag front idea? Will Marie cheat on Hank? (We hope so.) Why is Hank so into rocks? Seriously, that may be our most burning question.

The show is continuing its slow burn start to the season, but it re-instituted the black humor and almost Tarantino-ish random dialogue (see: the video game zombie discussion). Therefore, we deem it better than last week, even without a shocking twist or gore. This is a show that wants to make sure we get its themes before it moves onto any significant events.

Episode Grade: B

Captain America: Proof that guys too enjoy a makeover movie.

Maybe it’s because all this TV and internet has shot this blogger’s attention span to hell, but the first 1.5 hours of Captain America were really, really boring. Sure, the visuals were good, the cast was alright, and there were spurts of action, but there was nothing going on either mentally or emotionally. It took too long for the guy to become Captain America especially since the audience KNEW that he was going to become Captain America (and how it was going to happen).

We appreciate that this classic hero didn’t get anti-heroed up because of modern trends (like Arthur in the recent stupid Camelot series), and we liked the bravery and good messages and all that, but couldn’t there have been some sort of human conflict beyond good vs. Nazis? Captain America is a likeable guy and his humility is going to be a nice contrast to the attitudes of Tony Stark and Thor in the Avengers movie. There should be some good jokes there.

But if the hero is just going to be a straight good guy, you need to show how wonderful and rare that really is by amping up the evil. That meant that Hugo Weaving's baddie needed to be a lot scarier and more appalling than he actually was. He needed to be so horrifying and hated that when it came time for our hero to kick the crap out of him, the whole movie theater applauded and cheered. Instead, he was boring. He had a red skull. Big flippin' deal. His death was obligatory, not satisfying.

The action was pretty great, especially near the end. That’s when the movie became the shameless fun we wanted it to be during the first half. So if you are thinking of walking out, stick with it, because it wouldn’t be good to sit through the dull bits and miss the climactic battles.

There’s been a lot of joking about the actors’ various German accents, and it’s totally deserved. Hugo Weaving and Stanely Tucci were both playing characters from Germany and their accents were completely different, which means one of them was totally off. Maybe both. We aren’t experts in that accent, so we aren’t sure which. And why does Captain America have to wear a mask when his identity is NOT A SECRET?

This movie was sort of a prequel to the upcoming Avengers movie, which had better be good. Stay until after the credits, because there is something there to see, and after you’ve sat through all two hours of the actual movie, the credits should be easy to bear. The superhero movie of the summer is still X-Men First Class, followed by Thor. This is better than The Green Lantern though. And we were digging the retro vibe.

SPOILER ALERT in the comments, as we will be making a comment on the ending.

Movie Grade: B-