America's Next Top Model - Exploring Greece

We are annoyed that Dominique went home and not Angelea. Angelea is an idiot. Her ego is so big that she can’t take any criticism, even if it’s criticism in the form of a compliment. We get that she doesn’t trust her competition to actually care about her, but the fact that she freaked out is ridiculous and makes us think she’s a big baby. She even said she had no confidence and has been fighting a battle against negative thoughts! The girls are pointing out what she has already said was true. Even if it wasn’t true, and the girls were totally wrong, Angelea overreacted. Angelea, if you are at home googling your name to find out why you were sent home (as we know you will be), you need to get over yourself.

Lisa is the most honest girl in the house, even if she is going to be the target for some hatred because of how hard she is on Allison. Lisa said, “Allison looks like she is dead.” That’s true, if you look at the corpse bride in Tim Burton’s animated film. The eyes are similar. Lisa knows that Allison is the main competition. That’s why everyone voted her as the girl with the least potential. Duh! It’s because they are all afraid of her. We really hope that Allison actually knows this and was just pretending to be sad. Of course the girls vote the most forgettable, sweet girl as the girl who is the best, because she isn’t a threat. Lisa points this out, and also points out that Angelea is defensive. Lisa is the Greek chorus of this show, if the Greek chorus were really, really arrogant.

The photo shoot was alright. Allison always does well, and this shoot was no exception. She had a rocky start though. Lisa comes clean about her fears that the judges conspire against some girls and pick a bad photo for the ones that they want to go home. Nigel is all, “That’s crazy.” But YOU KNOW that’s what we’ve all been thinking all these years. We don’t get to see the other photos. No one does. Laura got the best photo, and she actually deserved it. Dominique was sent home, probably because she generates less drama than ridiculous Angelea. While we are still rooting for Allison, a part of us wants Lisa to win too. She’s a dark horse, she’s old, she’s blunt, she’s observant, and we want to see Tyra pick a girl who boasts about her talents, for once. Tyra always goes for the girl who is all, “Who, me? I didn’t know I was special! Oh golly!” We’re getting sick of that.

WE WILL HAVE THREE MORE SEASONS OF SOUTH PARK!!!!

The show has been renewed through 2016!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We really believe the world needs this show to call it out on its BS, so we are super stoked.

The Slanderous Chickens Have Come Home to Roost

The New Directions and the Troubletones are set to compete against each other at Sectionals, which we thought both teachers should be pretty happy about. This gives them two chances to win at Sectionals. It’s obvious that whichever team wins will graft the other team in when the kids on the losing team realize that they want to go to Nationals. Then both teachers can combine forces and make one awesome team. If the winning group doesn’t want the other kids to be in the group, tough. That’s all up to the teachers of the group. However, wouldn't that sort of defeat the purpose of splitting up the groups in the first place?

Will and Shelby decide to have a Mash-Off in order to turn the competition into something positive. Finn and Santana start their fighting again. Finn wants things to be more civil, and Santana answers that with all the trash talk she can muster. It’s a lot. Apparently, her grandmother verbally abused her. Oh, Glee abuse jokes! Ha ha WAH. The two try to settle their differences with a game of dodgeball, which is totally unfair to the girls-only Troubletones. Believe us, we’ve played dodgeball against guys in high school, and it goes from fun to scary, fast.

It looks like the Troubletones won the game though, because their pure viciousness is transformed into physical power. It’s pretty funny until all the Troubletones gang up on little Rory, who still has that hideous hair. Kurt takes issue with this whole thing and makes it one of his platforms to abolish dodgeball at the school, calling it “modern-day stoning.” Jeez, is anyone else sick of the bullying themes on this show? Glee needs to mine Degrassi for different ways to take high-school characters. Dodgeball can be really fun. Ern is particularly adept at dodging, but hideous at throwing and getting people out, so she’s usually the last person left in the game, but she’s completely useless. But it’s still fun! Dodgeball should be optional, not banned.

Santana is convinced by Mercedes and Brittany to “stop the violence,” so she goes to offer Finn an “apology,” which is hilarious, but quite a bad apology. After she calls Finn fat 100 times (???), Santana tells Finn that he will be riding Rachel's coattails for the rest of his life. Finn knows this, because he had pity sex after all his dreams were dashed last week. In retaliation, Finn calls Santana out in the hallway for being a coward who is in love with Brittany but can’t come out of the closet. While that was wrong, Finn thought it wouldn’t cause harm, because everyone in the school knows. Also, it’s totally true. Santana lashes out because of insecurity which is partly caused by her hidden lesbianism. We don’t blame Finn, however Sue’s rival for Congress (the one that is not Burt) has a daughter at McKinley who heard what Finn said in the hallway. The daughter went to her dad, and the dad made a tacky political ad bashing Sue for making a lesbian her head cheerleader, supposedly violating “family values.”

Sue, Burt Hummel, Will, and the principal come together in unity in order to break the news to Santana that she will soon be outed. That was one of our favorite parts of this episode. It was really sweet that Sue and Burt put aside their differences to support this student. (Sue had been making political ads lying about Burt and said they were “not personal.”) Santana still freaked out, exclaiming that she hadn’t even told her parents yet. She ran out and, soon after, had to perform her mash-up with the Troubletones. That mash-up was one of the best musical things this show has put out all season. Santana looked really wounded through the whole thing. At the end, Santana saw Finn whisper something to Rachel, who giggled. Santana lost it and slapped Finn across the face.

Puck is trying to get Shelby to be with him, but she is resisting it, which is one of the reasons we can tolerate this storyline. It’s surprisingly charming. Also, he’s 18, has plenty of sexual experience, and has plenty of cougar experience. It’s sweet how much he wants to be a part of Beth’s life. We don’t blame him, because Shelby is gorgeous and has way more motherly wisdom this season. He even tried some honesty with Shelby. That’s how she found out about Quinn’s plot to regain custody of Beth. When Quinn comes over, an honestly hurt Shelby reads Quinn the riot act and throws Quinn out. Quinn calls Shelby a whore.

Leeard had a huge problem with this episode, because it made her hate Santana. Santana has always been mean, but her actions this episode crossed over into heartlessness. Ern felt bad for Santana and was more annoyed at what a monster Quinn has become. We just know that Shelby’s refusal to expose Beth to Quinn will result in Quinn trying to take Shelby down. And we just know Quinn will find out about Shelby and Puck’s kiss.

Rachel bonds with Shelby and drops out of the race for student council president in order to help Kurt win, so that they can both get into NYADA together. As for the rest of the musical numbers, we almost always like when Glee does rock, so even though "Hot for Teacher" isn’t our favorite song, we liked the performance. It fit Puck and the plotline. It was a little weird to see Blaine and Mike doing JAZZ HANDS in the background of a Van Halen song. That kind of ruins the whole rock vibe. And CLUE IN WILL. Heads up: for more than two years, the songs the kids sing have reflected what they are going through in their lives. Will just smiled at the performance and approved. Ugh, idiot.

We liked the mash-up of the You and I songs, but one of us is a little sick of Lady Gaga’s "Yoü And I". “Hit Me With Your Best Shot/One Way Or Another” was “meh,” but the performance was funny. Finn shouldn’t sing Benatar, and “One Way Or Another” is overused. The world is sick of that song, and we are glad that Glee has gotten it over with. "You Make My Dreams Come True/I Can't Go For That" by Hall & Oates was really cute, especially if you like Hall & Oates. We loved the costumes and choreography, but we don’t feel the urge to download the song. The ADELE mashup ("Rumor Has It/Someone Like You") was the obvious winner this week. Santana’s eyelashes were too much though. We are mostly satisfied with the music this week (compared to the rest of the music this season), but we lament the lack of Rachel getting to sing rock, which we maintain is always a win.

Best lines? “You’re skinny like all the crops failed on your family’s farm” – Rory. "Don't judge me, I'm 18. It's legal. Besides, the age difference isn't that crazy. Just look at Ashton and Demi, Indiana Jones and Ally McBeal, Woody Allen and that Chinese girl." – Puck (great self-awareness here, Glee. If you’re gonna be creepy, address it.) "Rachel, your mustache is thicker than a Middle Eastern dictator's."- Santana. "Shut your potatoe hole. I'm here to apologize.... Please stick a sock in it. I'm trying to apologize to Lumps the Clown….At some point I must have liked that you look like a taco addict who's had one too many liposuctions. .... I am sorry, Finn…that you sing like you're getting your prostate checked. And you dance like you've been asleep for years and someone just woke you up."

Ern thought this episode had a season one tone, emotional depth, and a good treatment of Rachel. She’s a good person, see?!!! So this episode gets points for lack of Rachel hate and no cartoonishness to her character. We were annoyed that Kurt was so mad at Rachel for running against him, but we could see his point. We’re glad that they are friends again. Bring on that spin-off. We also liked the panning of ads that attack your competition. We lose respect for politicians who take that road, and it makes us less likely to vote for them, even though people who run on fear will prove that those ads work. Still, nice effort, Glee. Classy is always the way to go, even if you have to lose.

Leeard's grade: C+

Ern's grade: A-

Episode grade: B

Bad News for Prime Suspect Fans

Prime Suspect is not part of the midseason schedule. The first, and probably only, season of the cop drama will wrap after 13 episodes. We are pretty bummed, because we liked the show. There is still a chance that the show will be renewed, but we certainly aren't counting on it. Vulture reported that it shut down production. Community will also be benched for a while come midseason, but we refuse to believe that show will leave us. If it's not renewed for a fourth season, our rage will be endless.

How I Met Your Mother, which continues to kill in the ratings, turned in a really strong episode last night. It was heartbreaking and the "two minute" thing was really funny. Just about everyone is confused as to how Robin went from a confident woman who didn't need a man to someone who asks two men "Why do you even want to be with me?" Ugh. But, other than that, we give that episode an A-.

Hell on Wheels- Episodes 1 + 2 review and overview of the show (spoiler free)

This show is getting some mixed reviews, but after seeing two episodes, we’ve realized that this show has a TON of potential to become absolutely amazingly fun. The second episode is better than the first, and we see this show improving over the course of the season as we get to know these characters. We love AMC. We love Westerns. Lots of people have called the show’s first couple of episodes slow and meandering. Um, it goes a heck of a lot faster than The Walking Dead, and Hell on Wheels seems to be speeding up as it goes along. AMC lovers will love this show too. People get scalped. It’s rad. The first couple of episodes were, admittedly, an uneven and rocky start. But you can just see that this is going to be worthwhile.

The opening scene was good. This show does violence well. The violent scenes are intense, which is a surprise since we shouldn’t be expected to care about the characters yet. We don’t KNOW them yet, at all. The characters are not fleshed out yet, especially the main character, but we feel like there is plenty of time. It’s good to start with lots of mystery surrounding your characters to get us hooked. The Indian attack scene was incredible. We gasped a total of three times in the pilot, collectively. We aren’t sure if the main guy is too good looking or not. He’s doing a solid job so far, and the beard grizzles him up a bit.

We don’t know if we like the way the show is handling the race stuff. It’s almost Hallmark-y at points, if Hallmark were mixed with a little grit. Wait, except the way the Indians are handled. They are mostly just bloodthirsty savages (unless they've been baptized), killing all the white people. They need to stick some Hallmark in THERE, or it's gonna get real racist, real fast. We don't care for racist. Few people do anymore. Weirdly, the Cheyenne on this show speak to each other in English. Come on show, make an effort.

There are some questionable moments in the show. One example of a low point was the speech at the end of the pilot. What the heck was that? It was a bunch of nonsense, and it was crazy weird. But for every moment that hits the wrong tone, there is a moment that really grabs you. We think the kinks will get worked out. It’s AMC. We also love the music. If you’re looking for Deadwood 2.0, look elsewhere, because this show is NOT that show, and it's probably not even comparable to that show. But we like both Westerns.

The main character of this show is Cullen Bohannon, a former Confederate soldier and slaveowner, but he freed his slaves, so we are all allowed to like him. He is looking to avenge the death of his wife. Union soldiers killed her in Meridian, Mississippi. Cullen goes to “Hell on Wheels,” which is the tent city that follows the transcontinental railroad while it is being built. Cullen takes a job overseeing a crew of former slaves, even though he has no experience.

The man hiring was Mr. Johnson, a clearly racist old bastard with a crazy beard who we kind of liked, despite his doucheness. We liked him as a character. Mr. Johnson gives Cullen the job because Cullen once owned slaves. One of the black men Cullen oversees is Elam. Elam’s pretty angry about life, which is understandable, because he still feels like he’s a slave. Sure, he’s getting paid, but he’s also still getting yelled at, beaten, and overseen by former slave owners. Pretty soon though, Elam and Cullen buddy up a little, which is sweet in a bloody sort of way. You’ll see.

A little ways ahead of Hell on Wheels, there is a survey team led by a guy named Robert who has custody of all the maps. He has recently battled illness and was cared for by his sweet wife, Lily. They seem super in love, and it’s really sweet, until they get attacked by the Cheyenne in a pretty fantastic scene. Thomas “Doc” Durant is the entrepreneur getting the railroad up and running. He’s probably the worst person ever, but we love him too. What he does in the beginning of the second episode is just freaking classic. Then we meet “The Swede,” and he’s cool too. It looks like we have yet another show to watch. Sigh. Will we ever have free time again?

Episode grades: B

The Hunger Games First Full Trailer!!!

We were really worried that these movies weren't going to be as powerful or moving as the books. We both cried watching this trailer. It's so good. And no hint of Twilightness or romance obsession at all. Watch it. We will be watching it over and over and over. Why isn't it March 23rd yet?

Sidenote: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!