South Park Season 16 Part 2

We finally finished watching South Park's 16th season.

Sarcastaball: B-
This is the one where Randy creates a softer version of football and then finds himself unable to stop being sarcastic. This episode is mostly for football fans aware of a controversy over replacement referees. That's not Ern; Leeard, however, fits that bill. The satire worked best for the world's Leeards who would fully understand it, and for them, it should be on-point. Both of us liked the diss of Cee Lo Green for always being on TV and never having enough hit songs. The funniest thing was Butters innocently saving and selling his own semen.

Raising the Bar: B+
This is the one with Honey Boo Boo and James Cameron. We loved the message of this one. We've lowered the bar so much, it would take the events of this episode to raise it. Of course, Cameron's stuff isn't that great either. Avatar was a total rip-off with good visuals and little else going for it. We need to send Chris Nolan down in that submarine. Still, we loved the jokes about James Cameron's ego, as well as his theme song. Honey Boo Boo and her mother were portrayed perfectly and hilariously. Any episode that has Cartman spending most of the time on a scooter and ending up in a 'sketti fight with Alana is a winner to us.

We laughed several times in this episode, and we agree that Americans need to be more discerning, quality-wise, but we don't think Alana's show is the worst thing on TV. Yes, we've seen Here Comes Honey Boo Boo. Not a lot of it, but enough. One thing we liked is how much the family members love each other and get along most of the time. Most reality TV is filled with drama, fights, and backstabbing. This family has its...uh...faults, but they have each other's backs and seem to have fun together.

Insecurity: B
This is the episode where Kyle thinks his mom is sleeping with the UPS man and Cartman installs a security system. And also becomes Bane. We hate to say it, but Glee's Bane imitation trumped Eric Cartman's. What's with a spoof of security systems and people wanting to stay safe anyway? There are other things to spoof, surely. Still, we get the point that response is slow and probably inadequate, and they just profit off of people's fear. That's why one of our security systems consists of 1) lock, 2) glass bottle, 3) barking dog, 4) shotgun, 5) phone for police, and 6) back-up gun (Glock). Seriously. There were funny parts in this, mostly involving Cartman. Also, Ike's drawing showing up everywhere. Mostly though, we just felt bad for the cartoon UPS man.

Going Native: D+
This is the one where Butters goes to Hawaii with Kenny. We didn't think this episode was funny at all. Whatever was going on here, we didn't get it. Do you have to live in Hawaii and be annoying by white people pretending to be natives or something? Meh.

A Nightmare on Face Time: B
We were so excited to see The Avengers episode of South Park. Then it turned into a parody of The Shining as well. So cool. What a good idea for Halloween. The Blockbuster stuff wasn't timely though. If this episode came out when they were collapsing, it would have been better. Stan as an iPad bordered on poignant.  We laughed several times in this episode, especially at Randy. We liked when he was watching Ted on the screen. And the ending, with the McDonald's order.

A Scause for Applause: B
This was the Jesus episode that parodied the Lance Armstrong controversy and Livestrong bracelets. It was at this point in the season that South Park decided to be more timely. This episode and the presidential election one were spot-on parodies about what was actually, currently going on. We like the commentary about how stupid we are with spreading awareness about our causes without actually doing anything. It's just vanity/making us look stylish. Free Pussy Riot, indeed.

Obama Wins!: A-
This was the best, and last, episode of the season. We laughed at the poop-spewing duck once more, and we also liked the Morgan Freeman jokes. South Park handles politics perfectly, every time, while staying in the middle of the road, unlike most shows. Of course, the controversy wasn't mainly about the presidential election, but Disney getting Star Wars. South Park knows what we really care about. After the "seriousness" of one of the meanest elections ever, this episode was like a balm to all our irritation and worries over the last day. This show exists to make us laugh at what everyone else is freaking out about. It exists to slap down arrogance and point out stupidity. The show does it well.

New Girl, Cougar Town, South Park, and The Voice

New Girl - Kids

“I want to rub my face on his face!” is the best line in recent memory. The little girl was well-casted, and we are glad that CeCe isn’t pregnant. We loved Nick’s reaction to Russell’s daughter, Sarah, having a crush on him (“But I look like an old man!”) Nick, you’re perfect, and Jess is going to see that one day soon. We liked seeing Jeanne Tripplehorn getting post-Big Love work as Russell’s ex-wife who is definitely not over him. We are hoping to see more. Jess needs another archenemy. This show is the greatest in that it is consistent. It’s never horrid. It spans from pretty funny to hilarious. If it brought Lizzy Caplan back for another try at love with Nick, it would be perfect. We still haven’t seen the extent of her rage!

Episode grade: B+

Cougar Town - Ways to Be Wicked

We have to agree with the conclusion of this episode that if a family member just continues to be harmful and disrespectful, there is a point where you can cut them loose. There’s something to be said for unconditional love and seeing family members through hard times, but it benefits no one to let a family member continue to hurt you…especially that family member. We loved that Grayson is helping Laurie start her cake business! And that the security guard was bribable! This episode made us like Ellie more and gave her some well-needed softening. The episode was pretty funny too. Overall, we loved this one.

Episode grade: A-

South Park - I Should Never Have Gone Ziplining

This episode spoofed “I shouldn’t have…” reality TV programs. We weren’t feeling the first half. We were confused that the boys weren’t having fun. One of us went ziplining in Colorado, and it was super fun and scary. There were all sorts of steep drops and everything. Those boys picked the wrong tour. We liked the Shaka Bra thing, but the episode really picked up when they did a “re-enactment” of Kenny’s death. They had what looked like a bunch of douche-y frat boys play Kyle, Stan, Kenny, and Eric. We got a taste of what it would look like if South Park were not a cartoon. We liked that Kenny died of boredom and it was a great way to bring back the Christmas Poo himself.

Episode grade: B

The Voice this week

Christina should NOT have gone with Jessie Campbell. Growth and “Christina’s heart” are all well and good, but she wasted a good contender and just had to end up sending Ashley home the next day anyway. She should have gone with America’s vote and booted Ashley. That said, we prefer Chris Mann and Lindsay Pavao. Chris has a great voice and Lindsay has a unique one. They both just need the perfect songs that will fit them. Lindsay’s record is the one we would buy, so we are rooting for her. We thought Erin Willett did a great job with the ADELE song, but ADELE songs should not be covered anymore. We are glad RaeLynn went home. She wasn’t good. But that leaves Blake with no country artists, which is unexpected. Generally, the right people have been going home on this show. No one on the show blows us away, but we still have some dogs in the race. 

South Park - Butterballs review

This episode was better in the second half. The point throughout a lot of this episode was that those who are anti-bullying are bullies themselves. We don’t know if that rang true, but there were a few observations in this episode that hit things on the nose. The first half left us puzzled because we couldn’t see what was funny about having Butters’ grandma be the bully. It made us think too much about kids getting abused by older family members, and that just bums us out.

The plot ended strongly with Butters confronting his grandmother with a few perfect words, but the Grandma thing was still the weakest spot of the episode. We like when Butters stands up for himself. He is the best new character this show has ever added. He is both funny and sweet, an uncommon mix in comedy.

The first thing that made sense to us was the slam of the movie Bully. The episode asked the question, “If it is so important that people see it and if the reason you are making the movie to stop bullying, then why don’t you put it online for free?” It’s a good point. Bully’s main goal is to make money, get attention, and get accolades. It’s working on that front. But South Park puts all its episodes online for free because Matt and Trey want people to be able to see them. And South Park doesn’t even claim to be a show that eradicates social evils.

We still want to see Bully, but more for voyeuristic reasons than anything else. When you are anti-something and make a video about it, you need to make sure that you and your video are squeaky clean and that you aren't exploiting anyone (including bullied children) for profit. There is a trend nowadays that revolutionaries and socially conscious people are self-righteous liberals with their heads up their bums. We think it is great that anyone is trying, even if the attempts aren't perfect, but you can't expect South Park to ignore hypocrites or do-gooders. They are prime targets.

The episode also attacked the Kony 2012 campaign. The point there is that the creator of the Kony video, like Stan, made it all about himself and then went crazy. Stan's music video (interspersed with segments of Cartman in drag singing about his vajayjay) was clever and catchy. It was probably the funniest part of the episode. We also liked the original song about jacking off in San Diego.

If The Book of Mormon didn’t prove that the South Park creators have a way with music, then surely the South Park movie and plenty of episodes showcase that talent well enough. Trey Parker has a strong sense of melody. If you are up on the Bully, Jason Russell, and Kony 2012 information/news, this episode will be a treat for you. Otherwise, you will miss the more childish, less preachy, and more Cartman-filled episodes. The moral of this story? Don't do anything good and call yourself a world-rocker unless you are doing it for free and at the expense of no one but yourself.

Episode grade: B

Other shows we saw this week

Sunday
Shameless - A Great Cause

We shouldn’t be surprised that Fiona’s mom spent all the family’s money on coke. What with the addict Sheila took in and everything else, this episode should be shown in public schools to discourage kids from doing drugs. Sheila’s drug addict was so awful but so funny. We felt twisted laughing at it. We feel bad for Kevin and Veronica. It was hilarious when Steve lost Marco, Estonia’s love. No good deed goes unpunished. Ian wasn’t allowed to join the military until he finished high school, but we think they should make an exception. War might actually better for his mental health than living with his family. Jody and Sheila need to get together, officially. They are so dumb that they are made for each other. It was nice to see Fiona planning for her future, getting ambitious, getting herself a good job in management, jogging, and considering business school. Obviously, it was never going to last. These kids are her quagmire. Steve tried to get her away last season, but nothing is going to work. If Lip isn’t going to take his opportunities, then he should take Fiona’s place at home for a while. We feel bad for her. We feel even worse for Mandy. We are surprised Mandy isn’t getting an abortion. At least Monica made a lot of cookies while she was having her mental breakdown. 

Episode Grade: B+

Monday
Alcatraz - Webb Porter

In this groundbreaking episode, an inmate from Alcatraz reappears, kills people, and is caught by Rebecca, Doc, and Hauser. Ern thinks this show needs some sort of love story that’s actually romantic, and Ern never says this. She likes things that are based on themes bigger (or at least more unique) than romantic love. This show needs some romance though, and Lucy/Hauser isn’t cutting it, mostly because Hauser is old and kind of an A-hole. Lucy is really sweet though and we are glad this week's inmate could help her. She needs to learn that it’s laughter that’s the best medicine, not music. What kind of doctor is she, not knowing the basics? Webb Porter gives some truly bad haircuts. We like how hard his first victim fought. If you have to go out, that’s the way. There’s a lesson in this, and it’s “don’t abuse your kids” even though they smell and probably deserve it. This episode dragged a little, but it was otherwise ok. This show may get cancelled anyway. We won't be devastated, but we won't be happy.

Episode Grade: B-

How I Met Your Mother - The Broath

This episode had a promising title. We liked Barney’s Broath, his robes, and his monk-chanting CD. We can’t believe Ted Evelyn Mosby broke the broath. He's the worst. Marshall and Lily sound like they have a great sex life…we did get to see the downside of only ever sleeping with one person though. One clever moment in this episode had Ted confronting three college kids that resembled Marshall, Lily, and Ted when they were in college. Anything with an intervention or ninjas is usually a win with us, but this episode wasn’t as funny as it could have been. This season has been really average. Things got too dramatic when Quinn broke up with Barney, even if it did turn into an evil plan. Also, one of us has a huge problem with women slapping or hitting their boyfriends or husbands in entertainment (and in life). If a guy did that, he would be a total monster in the episode or movie. If a girl does it, it’s still abusive. Why did the evil plan even happen? Why is that funny? Oh wait, it’s not. This is turning into a soap opera. We had to watch Ted and Robin fight emotionally in the hallway. What happened to our lighthearted comedy? Then we had homophobic and fat jokes. Original! At least Robin got a promotion. Finally. Maybe we are being too harsh, but we just miss this show being one of the best things on TV. It has fallen farther even than The Office. All of the characters were awful this week. They were dishonest and, worst of all, not funny.

Episode Grade: D+

Being Human - Dream Reaper

This whole episode was about Sally losing it and the guys dealing with it. We love Sally with her straight hair. She looks good with either curly or straight. It was funny when Josh was talking to Sally about how Julia has gotten hotter. Where did they find those creepy pillows with the eyes on them for Sally’s dream living room? The whole color scheme (purple and grey) of that fantasy was pretty cool. Of course this happened on the full moon so that Josh, Aidan, and Zoe were trapped with Sally in the house. It was sweet that even though circumstances were dire, Josh and Aidan refused to consider shredding Sally. It was scary when the Reaper spoke through Sally and told Zoe all the secrets. Josh’s idea to change in the fridge was freaking hilarious. We thought Josh would be the first one to lose it and were surprised when it was Aidan. It was cool to see Aidan and Josh fight, even if it was short-lived. Some guys can still come across as masculine when they cry, and Aidan is not one of them. It was funny when Josh fed Aidan…up to a point, obviously. The episode was cool, but it solved almost nothing.

Episode Grade: B+

Tuesday
New Girl - Fancyman Part 1

Nick’s credit score is about like Ern’s, haha. We liked Dermot Mulroney as Russell and seeing a mature guy interested in Jess. He looks a bit older than 42 though. Just googled it. The actor is 48. Jess’ commitment to art and creativity in the classroom wasn’t funny, but everything else about this episode was. We really loved how impressed Nick was with Russell’s office. We were impressed too. We liked the way Jess delivered the line, “Bidet if I do.” The whole Bidet thing was a good idea. Russell is definitely too together for Jess. 

Episode Grade: B+

Wednesday
South Park - Cash for Gold

You may suck our collective balls, sir. This episode took aim at the home shopping network and their overpriced stuff. What is it with old people and getting swindled easily? Of course Cartman gets in on the home shopping business, because he sees it’s lucrative, and that’s all he needs. If Stan could have just worn the gay bolo tie and shut up, Cartman wouldn’t have found a source of income. The world needs for Cartman to never find his own source of income, other than his mother. Asians never come out well on this show, but at least it’s always funny. Also funny were the parts where Stan and the old people kept calling in to tell the salesman to kill himself. We knew he was going to. When they showed the cycle of how the jewelry was made and sold, the a cappella was a nice touch.

Episode Grade:  B+

America's Next Top Model - J. Alexander
This episode was the best of the Cycle so far, but we really aren't digging this cycle. We don't particularly like any of the girls, even though Ashley has the cutest accent ever. The photo shoots, especially the "toddler" one, have been stupid and unfunny. They had Kris Jenner on the show too. Say what? It was funny when that British model couldn't take criticism and left. It was also funny when Tyra told us she graduated from Harvard. That's important. Tyra spent a lot of time two weeks ago promoting Modelland. She gave the girls superhero model nicknames. One was "Illuminati." Dear Lord. We like this show half high fashion and half hot, dramatic mess. However, this Cycle has been all mess. This episode was a little tamer, but it didn't entertain us.
Episode Grade: C+

Thursday
Missing - Pilot
We were not impressed by this show. It isn't hideous, but it isn't good either. It's Taken with the genders swapped and it's not as entertaining as that movie was. It makes no sense, and there is too much action with too little character development. The action scenes are fun, but they came before we cared about the people fighting. We love Ashley Judd, but we have no time for a show that's this generic and dull.
Episode Grade: D+

Awake 
We are still watching and enjoying this show. It's avoided being uneventful and focuses on the characters more than the weekly mysteries. We like that.

Community - Contemporary Impressionists

Jeff took medication for his anxiety and got rid of all his self-doubt. Britta worried that without that self-doubt, Jeff would turn into a monster. It’s true that getting rid of self-doubt would make a narcissist more obnoxious. However, self-doubt does not tame the ego. Self-doubt is another manifestation pride, it’s just more unpleasant and makes you down on yourself rather than overtly arrogant. In this society, we say that to cure low self-esteem, we need high self-esteem, and to cure arrogance, we need to think badly of ourselves. The reason we are mainly writing this and not focusing on the actual show is that we believe this is a common confusion that hurts people struggling to be both more secure and more humble. Thinking badly of yourself or feeling shame won’t make you more humble; it will just make you depressed and more focused on yourself. You don’t want high or low self-esteem, you want NO self-esteem. You don’t want to always be thinking of yourself and how you are measuring up/looking. Spending time comparing yourself to others or evaluating your abilities (whether you decide you’re making out well or not) is taking time away from getting to know other people or actually doing something you love for its own sake, rather than how it makes you look. You should say what you think is the right thing to say, not what will make you admired. It’s best to take the mind off the self altogether, if possible, because that’s the ultimate statement that it’s not all about you. That’s the anti-ego. Jeff did not get this advice and pulled a Kanye in this episode. It was pretty funny. We loved Shirley’s fake Oprah Winfrey and Britta’s Michael Jackson. The Chang stuff was actually funny this episode. They are learning to use Chang sparingly. However, this episode wasn’t as good as the last one and was merely ok. We still think this is one of the best comedies of all time though. Stay weird, Community.

Episode grades: B-

The Vampire Diaries - Break on Through

Poor Alaric. But is the real problem gonna be Jeremy? We’re with Damon on Stefan’s eating habits. Stefan keeps falling off his wagon, so he needs to ditch the wagon and find a new way to deal with his hunger. Moderation sounds good. Sage showing up a mere episode after she was first mentioned was awfully  convenient. It’s also a little too convenient that there was another White Oak Tree, but we’ll go with it. This show has earned our suspension of disbelief, especially since the many Alaric deaths turned out to be important. Rebekah, you are an Original. Don’t let Damon treat you like this. You could own him with a swat. It’s really too bad that Abby bit Jamie, and not only because he is hot. Klaus, someone might be moving in on your girl… When Sage bit into a human’s arm, it sounded like she was biting into an apple. We don’t know if biting into a wrist would make that same noise. Who wants to try it and tape it for us? Sage looks a little like an older version of Elizabeth Banks. Dancing is foreplay for Damon. He shouldn’t dance with his arms over his shoulders if he wants to appear straight. That’s the rule, most of the time. Unless it’s ballet. This show is so crazy. We never thought we’d root for Meredith over Alaric in a scene. It’s hard not to see her as crazy Melissa from PLL. The third way too convenient development was Abby and Bonnie pulling an herbal cure for Alaric out of their asses. It’s nice to see Stefan and Elena both communicating and working together. We miss that couple. Thanks to Damon, the Original-killing game is finally back on!

Episode Grade: B+

Movies-
We watched Take Shelter, which was a very good movie that we ended up not liking. Sometimes the critics go nuts over something well-made and meaningful, but when it's over, we think, "So what?" We guess it reflected our modern sense of stress and doom pretty well. Certain scenes really grabbed us, there were some definite scary parts, and the lead actor was good. But we got to the ending and felt like we didn't get a proper resolution to all we had sat through. It's easier to be impressed with the quality of this movie than to actually like the movie. Movie grade: C+ Then we watched Attack the Block, which was fun and hilarious. Americans will need to watch it with subtitles because nearly all the dialogue is British slang. It's really funny if you can pick it up, but if you are just listening, we guarantee you will miss most of it. This is in our top three alien invasion movies. Movie grade: A-

South Park - Reverse Cowgirl

Thank you, Lord! Season 16 begins! Even when the season isn't very good, we are happy to watch this show. We miss it so much when it is off the air, because there is no one to take the smug to task without becoming smug themselves. This show needs to exist, for society's sake.

The episode focused on a long-standing debateà  Is it the man’s or woman’s responsibility to make sure the toilet seat is down before a woman sits on it? Clearly, one of the South Park guys had a fight with a wife or girlfriend about leaving the toilet seat up, and this is their response. We wish we had a cartoon with which to spread our angst.

We fall on the side of the women. It is the gentlemanly thing to do. If you believe in any drop of chivalry at all these days, then you will agree that touching a toilet seat because a man left it up is something men should not expect us to do. Gross. With Clyde’s last action, we saw where Trey and Matt stand. Typical dudes.

The episode also mocked the greed of lawyers. You can always sue somebody! The sue-ance was great, especially because of the line: “By the power of Christ, we sue you!” The brunt of the satire also fell on the TSA for having stupid safety laws that subject people (who are clearly not terrorists) to discomfort, long lines, and invasion. It also strongly implied that the people in the TSA are far from real cops and they don't protect anything.

When Harrington actually appeared and especially when he made his revelation about the…uh…laundry hole, we actually laughed aloud. One of us may use the restroom facing the back of the toilet from now on, in tribute to this show. Fortunately, the show didn’t abandon Cartman and Butters, who are the best characters on the show, obviously. They had some good lines, and we even saw the time-honored tradition of hearing Cartman verbally abuse his mom.

We loved seeing the TSA get a beatdown, and there were plenty of gross-out moments that are required in a good South Park episode. This was a strong premiere for South Park, even if it wasn’t a classic.

Episode grade: B+

WE WILL HAVE THREE MORE SEASONS OF SOUTH PARK!!!!

The show has been renewed through 2016!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We really believe the world needs this show to call it out on its BS, so we are super stoked.

Funny Stuff- But too bad there were no abc comedies this week :(

New Girl - “CeCe Crashes”
We were surprised that the Nick and Jess pairing that will so obviously happen was already addressed. CeCe convinced Jess that Nick has feelings for her, and this freaked Jess out a little too much. That’s not a promising start to a relationship. Schmidt spent the episode trying to “close” with CeCe, and he “succeeded” because they slept in the same bed and held hands. Aww. Actually, we see those two together.

Episode grade: B

Up All Night - “First Night Away”
Reagan and Chris find it hard to find time for sex, so they decide to go away for a night. They get a full night of sleep and some sex. Ava babysat and met Reagan and Chris’ neighbor, Kevin, a single dad. Ava and Kevin hit it off and kissed. We really liked this episode because it made great use of Maya Rudolph, who we usually love. Sometimes her character on this show can be too silly, but this week the character was funny and she fit.

Episode grade: A-

South Park - “A History Channel Thanksgiving”
This was one of the weakest recent South Park episodes, but since the show returned in the fall, it has been really strong, so saying an episode is weak by those standards isn’t much of a diss. This episode mocked The History Channel, Thor, and Thanksgiving. It also mocked people who pretend to be part Native American in order to get the benefits and cool points. The Thor and Natalie Portman stuff was pretty funny.

Episode grade: B

America’s Next Top Model - “Nikos Papadopoulos”
Question: Who the hell has Shannon as their role model? We want to SEE these letters written by young girls to Shannon, because we don’t believe that they exist. The blogger writing this entry actually is a Christian and gets made fun of by the guys in her program for dressing too conservatively and appearing “virginal.” This blogger would like to give a big “Go F yourself” to those guys. Moving on… The reason this blogger doesn’t like Shannon is the same reason Nigel was perplexed by her. It IS semantics. It’s all about whether it’s called a bathing suit or panties? Dumb. It’s morals for no reason. She just looked like a hypocrite in her season, so Shannon wanted to come back and redeem herself by continuing to stand up for morality. Unfortunately for her, the producers didn’t have anyone pose nude this time. We know the show only brought Shannon back for drama, and that’s also the reason they brought out the panties again. She was too old to win. We don’t like rules for the sake of rules. There are plenty of things to stand for without making dumb stuff up. Good riddance. Allison is one step closer.

Episode grade: B-

The Office - “Pam’s Replacement”
Only Dwight could repeatedly grab another man’s crotch and have it be totally not gay. We haven’t like Jim and Pam this much in an episode in a long time, however. They were cute and funny. Pairing these two with Dwight is always a success. If only the Robert California/Kevin/Andy/Daryl band hadn’t gotten so much attention. That wasn’t funny, but that drummer was pretty good.

Episode grade: B-

Parks and Recreation - “The Treaty”
We liked seeing Leslie go bloodthirsty for a bit, and we liked watching Ron whip Tom back into shape, but this episode just wasn’t as funny as this show usually is. It was cool to see Ann tell Chris about how she grew as a person after their relationship. The reason he gave up on her WAS because he got bored, because she had stopped being herself. If Ann can find a way to keep her sarcastic, down-to-earth personality while she is around Chris, there might be hope for them to become a couple again. And this time, to become a good one. He needs someone to mock him every once-in-a-while. Also, the moon should totally be part of the U.N.

Episode grade: B

Community - “Studies in Modern Movement”
We’re getting a little sick of the Shirley vs. Britta religion stuff. One of them needs to convert so that they stop it. Also, the Pierce stuff wasn’t very funny. But the Jeff Winger stuff was fantastic. Way to ruin that Seal song for us! Ok, who are we kidding? That song ruins itself. Guilty pleasure, though, for one of us. The Troy/Abed/Annie plot was sweet. This episode had enough laughs and sweet character moments to make it more than enjoyable.

Episode grade: B+

Comedies - Written as we listened to the Glee Christmas soundtrack part two for the first time!

Modern Family - Treehouse
We really liked the Cam and Mitchell storyline and Leslie Mann’s guest-starring role. We also liked the line “It’s like the gift of the vagi.” Ha. Jay and Gloria’s storylines need work, we think. Also, Jay shouldn’t dance with his arms raised over his shoulders if he wants people to see him as a straight man too. That’s a pro tip for all you guys out there. Gay = over the shoulders. Straight = never. Admittedly, Jay did say he was a bad dancer.

Episode grade: B

America’s Next Top Model - Game
Notice we always lump this show in with the comedies. We know you don’t disagree. Anyway, we official ship Game and Allison Harvard harder than just about anyone else on TV right now. We thought she had a bad voice though and that Lisa should have won the challenge. Lisa is really winning us over this season. We were disappointed that Alexandria went home. We thought her video came off as snobby, avant-garde, and fashionable, not awkward, and she had a really interesting voice tone. Game is way more of a sweetheart than we expected. We’re fans now.

Episode grade: B

South Park - 1%
The show gets points for being timely, but man, there was so much wasted opportunity here. We came away unsure of what the South Park guys THOUGHT of the 99% movement, which is disappointing, because we love to know their opinions. They keep us sane and balanced. We came away thinking that Trey and Matt (or Cartman) think that the 99% just want to blame the rich people because they can’t bring themselves to blame Obama, because he is black. We don’t think race has anything to do with it, if that’s what they are saying. People just don’t want to be wrong about their political party or who they voted for, so they always just examine evidence that confirms their original chosen side, race or not. Also, the episode just wasn’t very funny. We are, however, going to occupy somewhere stupid with signs to honor the show and take pictures.

Episode grade: C

New Girl - Naked
Jess saw Nick naked and he freaked out. Bonjour Le Peen. We think the roommates are sometimes too mean to Jess and Jess is sometimes a little too stupid. This episode was funny though, and Lake Bell came on and did her awkward thing.

Episode grade: B

Up All Night - Parents
We liked Reagan’s parents, but this episode just wasn’t as funny as we wanted it to be. And we are starting to agree that Maya Rudolph doesn’t fit the rest of the show. We did like her singing over the video for the dead crewmember though. That was the sole out-loud laugh for us.

Episode grade: C+

Suburgatory - Charity Case
Tessa has trouble getting her school to understand what she is saying when she tells them that they should stop wasting food. In order to let everyone know how the poor live, she brought a homeless transsexual to school, which we think is kind of rude to the homeless transsexual. Still, it was all pretty funny. We need Noah’s character to be fleshed out better in the future.

Episode grade: B

Happy Endings - Lying Around
Brad and Jane lie to each other in order to have staycations. Penny knows some guys who people have tried to set her up with in the past but, since she's happily in a relationship, she lends one to Alex to date. However, Penny becomes jealous and gets him back. Dave makes one of the funniest, most awkward commercials ever, and then Max ruins it by making it good, but forgetting to put the name of the business and what Dave sells in the ad.

Episode grade: B

Community - Advanced Gay
Pierce becomes a gay icon and Jeff kills Pierce’s father. Yeah, it was just as awesome as it sounds. One of us is determined to put an item in her will that will be given to whoever can best be blamed for her death, because that is just a spectacular idea. Also, some Good Will Hunting stuff happened with Trey again, and it was still funny.

Episode grade: B+

Parks and Recreation - End of the World
When a local cult predicts the end of the world, the main characters have to think about their lives and priorities. Tom throws a party, as usual, and April helps Andy complete his bucket list. His bucket list is not as weird as we wanted it to be, but that storyline was sweet. We mourn for Ben and Leslie. The last two episodes have missed the happy energy we like about this show. Episode grade: B

The Office - Doomsday
Dwight comes up with an incentive to scare the office workers into not making mistakes. He’s a sweetheart at the core though, because he called the whole thing off just in time. He and Pam really do have a special, creepy bond. We like that there was more of a focus on Jim, Pam, and Dwight than, like, Erin. This was one of the funnier episodes this season. This show isn’t dead yet.

Episode grade: B+

As for the Christmas album, it was better than the last one. So if you liked that, you'll love this. Sadly, Dianna Agron has no songs on it. AGAIN. Why does the show think we hate her pleasant voice?

Why didn't enough comedies turn in Halloween episodes? (We're looking at you Modern Family and Up All Night)

Happy Endings - “Spooky Endings”
Jane and Brad decide to spend Halloween in the suburbs to get a look at their future, because Jane doesn’t want to raise kids in the city. Jane dresses as Bacon, but Brad forgets his Egg costume. Things go awry when they don’t have enough candy for the big kids. Then it’s war. Penny has Max’s head sticking out of her stomach in a baby Bjorn for her costume. It’s even funnier than it sounds. Dave dresses as Austin Powers, but that was so ten years ago, so no one knows who he is and thinks he is Elton John. Alex gets a raspy voice because she has a cold, dresses as Marilyn Monroe, and is mistaken for a transvestite. This might be our favorite Halloween episode of the season. We’ve just realized how eternally bummed we will be if this show doesn’t stick around.

Episode grade: A

South Park - “Broadway Bro Down”
The South Park guys have gotten a second wind since they don’t have to focus so much on The Book of Mormon and it seems they have re-committed to making the show good. This episode spoofs many Broadway shows, Sondheim, and veganism. For people who like Broadway and recognize the shows and how similar the mock tunes sound to the actual scores, this episode is an even bigger treat. This episode featured less Cartman than we usually like, but it more than made up for it in plentiful crass humor and theater references.

Episode grade: A

Community - “Horror Fiction in Seven Spooky Steps”
Britta gets the gang to share scary stories in order to determine who got a score of “psycho” on her personality test she gave out for psychology class. It turns out Britta put the tests into the scoring machine the wrong way, so when she re-scored them, she found that all of the group’s members were crazy except for one. We love that it was Abed who isn’t the psycho one! That makes the most sense, anyway. This was really funny for people who know the characters of this show, because each person’s scary story fit them so well. We died laughing at Pierce’s. Shirley’s made us hate her a little, but it was still funny.

Episode grade: A-

2 Broke Girls - “And the Disappearing Bed”
Caroline has to put together a Murphy bed without the help of a man. Max has to work up the stones to give Peach a business card for the cupcake business, because Peach is having a birthday party for her children. Both girls succeed in their tasks, with mixed results. Max develops an adorable crush on Johnny from the bar. We like where this was going. This episode was one of the show’s best, and it’s one that we wish had aired early on in the show’s run, so that people checking it out could have used this episode in order to judge the show. Also, what is up with vision boards on TV lately? Who is the lobbyist who got vision boards on multiple shows in less than a week? They should have vision boards on, like, Terra Nova. What is up with vision boards' increasing popularity? The Secret came out years ago, and it's still stupid now.

Episode grade: B+

The Office - “Spooked”
Oh, Office. We dropped you, but then we were bored and marathoned your newest episodes. Not bad. Not good either, but not bad. Good enough to get you back on our watch list. The episode “Garden Party” was the best of the bunch, because it had lots of good Dwight/Jim interactions. The Halloween episode wasn’t too shabby either. The writers nailed the costume choices. We enjoyed Robert California’s plot to figure out everyone’s deepest fears in order to tell the perfect ghost story. We are liking Andy better, especially since he got that tattoo. We still don’t like Erin though. And it looks like we never will.

Episode grade: B

Parks and Recreation - “Meet ‘n Greet”
This episode had way too much Tom, and that’s why it’s gotten the lowest grade of the season so far. While all the characters on this show are necessary and funny, Tom is the least so (even though we love Aziz Ansari). Tom emcees an event for Leslie’s campaign, but it ends up being all about him and his company. In the end, Tom admits to Leslie that his company has failed. We didn’t think this plotline was funny. We were just embarrassed for Tom and Leslie. Fortunately, the B-plot saved it. Andy and April threw a Halloween party to Ben’s displeasure, because they didn’t warn him first. Ron Swanson and Ann fix things around Andy and April’s house rather than join the party. With most of our strongest characters bringing laughs at the Halloween party, Tom had no chance of stealing this show.

Episode grade: B

Suburgatory - “Halloween”
This creatively named episode had Tessa dressing as a mock suburban girl, complete with a bump-it, track suit, and heels. But then her friends tell her that she looks and speaks just like the girl who used to live in Tessa’s house, who went to "a better place". Tessa’s friends perform an exorcism, but then their long-gone classmate returns. Crisis averted? George tries to convince Dallas that being scared can be fun so that Dallas will give him permission to decorate his lawn for Halloween. Yep, there’s a home-owner’s association. George finally meets Dallas’ husband, Steven. Neither of the plots really worked for us, but they were interspersed with good enough jokes that this episode squeaked by with an above average grade. The guillotine helped.

Episode grade: B-

How I Met Your Mother - “Noretta”
It’s finally time for Barney to sleep with Nora, but things on their date keep going wrong and ruining their date. Barney always finds a way to turn it around though. Also, the gang ponders the weirdness of how people tend to end up with someone with similarities to their parents. One of us thought this episode was funny. The end tag was pretty great, and the episode didn’t try to shoehorn a bunch of things in. The other blogger wanted to slap this episode with a big F for being unoriginal and unnecessary filler, but even she has to admit that the concept has merit. People DO end up with their parents a lot of the time. After all, Ern has always been attracted to Republican guys.

Episode grade: C+

She’s a whole lotta ball of fire with no flame.

How I Met Your Mother - “History v. Mystery”
Everyone bought smartphones, causing Barney and Robin to research all of Ted’s dates before he goes out with them. Ted goes out with the perfect woman, and Robin and Barney ruin it by letting him know that she is perfect. Thus, he is too intimidated to talk to her. Of course, because it’s Ted. Marshall and Lily try to keep their baby’s gender a secret from everyone, including themselves. But Barney doesn’t like that plan. Turns out, it’s a boy, so now Marshall and Lily can get that ugly yellow color off the nursery walls. We thought the flashback to Ted’s horrible dates were funny, and we like Robin’s boyfriend and think he’s fitting in a lot better than Zoey did. However, pregnancy has been done to death on TV and Ted’s main date was kind of boring. This one wasn’t bad, but it was forgettable.

Episode grade: C

2 Broke Girls - “And the ‘90s Horse Party”
Caroline plans a ‘90s party at the diner when she realizes that rich hipsters will come and pay money to ride her horse. This takes care of both Max’s bad credit and her student loans (Max was an art major). Man, how come our mutual friend named Caroline doesn’t own a horse that can help us pay off our debts? Caroline’s ex-boyfriend shows up at the diner multiple times. He stopped calling when Caroline lost her old life and money. Caroline was not yet ready to face him, but Max was more than ready and willing to be a total jerk to him. It was wonderful. An episode where a filthy, cowardly ex gets told off, the girls bond even more, and hipsters get made fun of? We like.

Episode grade: B+

America’s Next Top Model - “Coco Rocha”
Now THERE’S a photo shoot we like. However, we think it’s pretty funny that these girls are always having to do these dramatic photo shoots with emotions and character. Every time we flip through a Vogue magazine, the models are just standing there, with no expression, wearing clothes that would look better on a little boy’s body than any woman’s. But it is fun to watch. Kayla and Alison sucked on set, but because they are so dang photogenic, it worked out for them. It was down to Alexandria and Bre for the cut. Of course they wouldn’t get rid of drama/entertainment source Alexandria. So it was Bre’s turn to go. We don’t mind. As long as Alison wins, this Cycle will justify its existence. Also, the quote in the title was from this episode. Haha, these models don’t even know what they are saying.

Episode grade: B

Up All Night - “Birth”
We get a whole flashback episode where Reagan is still pregnant and has to have a C-section when her birthing plan goes awry. Chris debates leaving his law firm and Ava makes it all about herself, as per usual. Yeah, this stuff happened. But we don’t remember ever asking to see it. We still like this show, but we didn’t laugh much in the episode. Maybe we’ve just seen too many TV births. Unless they were going to have something crazy happen, this was unnecessary. Leeard liked it a lot more than Ern did.

Episode grade: B-

Suburgatory - “Don’t Call Me Shirley”
Sheila’s daughter steals her Shirley Temple doll collection, and Sheila thinks it was an intruder who stole them. This makes the whole town a little crazy. Dallas and Dalia stay at Tessa’s house for protection. Tessa tries to take the blame so that her dad will think the suburbs are having a bad influence on her, but he’s no dummy. We thought it was really sweet how Tessa’s dad joked at the end about how well he knows her. We loved Tessa’s line when Dalia was sleeping.

Episode grade: B

Modern Family - “Go Bullfrogs!”
Phil takes Haley to his old college to try and spark her interest in higher education. Gloria worries that Manny is hiding Playboys. It turns out that he simply bought a device on the internet that was supposed to make him taller so that he could win the affections of a female classmate. Finally, Claire tries to have a night out with Mitchell, Cameron, and some other gay guys. But Mitchell and Cameron are too old for late nights out and they leave Claire with a straight French guy who she flirts with because she thinks he’s gay. Jay gets hooked on a soap opera. Why did we love this so much? Because we got to see Claire not being uptight! We got a few nods to her wilder younger days. Finally, Julie Bowen got to have a fun storyline all to herself. The Jay/Gloria/Manny stuff was the weakest storyline. We also liked that Haley was nice to her dad for most of the trip. And Phil’s bulldog noise.

Episode grade: A+

Happy Endings - “Secrets and Limos”
Jane is into The Secret, it seems. She convinces everyone to make “vision boards” so that they can focus on what they want in life, and the universe will sense that force of desire they create and give them their desires. Penny wishes for outlandish things, and Jane tries to deliver so that Penny keeps believing in the boards/is happy. Brad has trouble telling his boss that he has food on his face. Max does not share this problem. Max and Brad’s boss get along well, until Max misreads a moment and kisses him on the cheek….awkward. Dave gets a horrible, vapid, and offensive girlfriend. She was funny, so we hope she will be back. There’s a good chance he won’t hang onto this one for more than one episode though.

Episode grade: A

South Park - “Bass to Mouth”
The Gerbil on a Mission thing is back. And so is the singing that goes with it. That’s cool though. You expect a certain amount of weird when you watch South Park. The best thing for us (as usual) was the Cartman storyline. We think the lesson of this episode, the midseason premiere, and Scott Tenorman must die is clear: NEVER EAT ANYTHING GIVEN TO YOU BY ERIC CARTMAN. We chuckled more than a few times in this one. So far, South Park is three-for-three with the second half of season 15.

Episode Grade: B+

Also, we caved and caught up on The Office. The Dinner Party episode was good. There was no new episode this week though. Same with Community. We're both bummed.

Treat Yo Self

2 Broke Girls - "And the Rich People Problems"
Caroline’s advanced Bruxism is acting up, so she and Max sneak into her old place to get her night guard. The cheap dentist is scary. Max is blown away by Caroline’s old things, particularly her bathtub. Then run off with tons of furs and purses that they can’t sell, because they were inventoried. They did get some good sushi though. Lots of good visual comedy in this episode. The girls’ chemistry was at its best in this episode, and this might be the show’s strongest outing so far.

Episode grade: B+

Up All Night - “Mr. Bob’s Toddler Kaleidoscope”
Chris and Reagan take Amy to an advanced playgroup, and Reagan isn’t good at it. Ava feels like Reagan isn’t spending enough time with her and freaks out. One problem: we can’t remember laughing in this episode. Leeard really enjoyed this episode, though.

Episode grade: B-

Suburgatory - “The Chatterer”
George clashes with a mom on his street, Sheila, who is butting in and trying to co-parent Tessa. He joins the PTA to show that he has what it takes to be a good parent. All of the women like him and his advice on how to get along with their husbands, but Sheila is upset that everyone is listening to him. She quits the PTA. George finally realizes that she is the better PTA leader and resigns. Tessa joins the school paper for her elective requirement and turns it into a tabloid full of high school gossip. We liked that plot better when it was on a Nickelodeon cartoon. She eventually regrets her actions and puts the paper back to its original, boring form. Not a great episode, but not bad either.

Episode grade: B

Happy Endings - “Yesandwitch”
If we were casting directors (and we should be), we would totally pick Megan Mullally to play Penny’s mom. Fortunately, the showrunners were thinking the right way and put her on the show as a party singer. When Penny learns that her mother’s positive attitude is a front for hiding her problems (a recent divorce and a career that’s going nowhere), she tries to snap her mother back to reality. Instead, she crushes her, and it took a nice speech plus a musical number to bring her mom back to normal. Jane and Brad take a couples improv class.

Episode grade: B+

South Park -“The Last of the Meheecans”
The boys have a game where half of them pretend to be U.S. border patrol agents. The other half pretend to be Mexicans trying to sneak across the border. When Butters gets lost and is mistaken for a real Mexican, he starts a revolution where all of the Mexicans want to go back to Mexico, because America’s economy sucks now. Cartman volunteers for the real border patrol and is very good at keeping Mexicans from crossing the border. He fails to keep Butters from coming back to the U.S. though. His team loses the game. None of this makes any sense, but it’s South Park, so that’s not surprising. Plus, it was pretty funny.

Episode Grade: B+

Community - “Remedial Chaos Theory”

Troy and Abed invite the rest of their gang to dinner at their new pad. But Jeff starts six different timelines/parallel realities. There are no real plot consequences to this, but this episode was still one of the show’s strongest and funniest, especially for people who know the characters well. We are extremely impressed with this one. The show's still got it, and then some.

Episode grade: A+

Parks and Recreation - “Pawnee Rangers”
Ron Swanson and Leslie Knope have competing children’s clubs, one for boys and one for girls. Leslie’s is more fun. Ron’s is more awesome. The kids don’t know that though, so the boys join the “Pawnee Goddesses,” leaving Ron alone until Leslie starts him a new, unisex club. Meanwhile, Tom and Donna try to teach Ben to relax and shop. He buys a Batman costume and cries over Leslie. That cowl does nothing for him… This was really funny episode, as usual.

Episode grade: A-

If you could have dinner with any famous person, dead or alive, who would it be? Scarlett Johansson. Dead. - One reason we love Suburgatory

America’s Next Top Model - "Anthony Zuiker"
Just give the crown to Allison, already. We agreed with who was kicked off over Lisa, because Lisa is more entertaining, and the point of a TV show is to entertain us. Perfect IS boring. We liked the photo shoot and the acting challenge, which proved that models can’t read. We still don’t like or want to watch CSI.

Episode grade: B

Happy Endings - "Baby Steps"
This episode focused on teenaged brats, plus Max having trouble paying his rent. We love that the solution to that was selling his Beanie Baby collection. Remember when all the adults told kids to keep those secret, keep those safe, because they would be valuable one day? Max was the only kid who did. The episode mocked how teenagers wear tiny, literal baby tees to show off their assets. Penny jumping on the bandwagon was awesome. Jane’s crazy continues to be funny, not annoying, even though the neurotic, perfectionist female character has been done to death.

Episode grade: B+

Up All Night - "New Car"
Chris and Reagan realize that they need a more practical car for their child, so they get drunk and shop for one on the internet. You can guess how well that turned out. This was a sweet episode, if not laugh-out-loud funny. It was a little more grounded and the Ava character was more realistic than last week. We approve of this direction. This show definitely tops Will Arnett and Christina Applegate’s last shows for us.

Episode grade: B-

Suburgatory - "The Barbecue"
Tessa finds herself attracted to the jock next door, because he’s good looking, but she realizes that this is a bad thing, because he is dumb as a rock and has the personality of a piece of bread. This episode had a few laughs, and we’ve realized that this show is the Homeland of comedies (meaning that it’s a sleeper). No one expected it to be good, and it is.

Episode grade: B+

Modern Family - "Door-to-Door"
Will this show ever let Claire be fun? The only plot we liked this week was the one where Jay and Manny had to sell wrapping paper together, especially how Manny capitalized on Jay’s ego. We did enjoy Phil and Luke’s videos. That needs to happen more often. While this show is stuck in repetition mode, it needs to repeat some things that we actually find funny. You know who is adorable? Stella. We want that dog. You know who is not adorable? Lily. We know we are total peens for saying this, but that kid’s face is busted and she just doesn’t have the “cute factor” in her line delivery. That’s not a natural comedic actress right there. They should have stuck with the old kids and just had Lily talk whenever one of those kids started talking. Now that we have bashed the acting skills of a pre-schooler, we’re just going to wrap this up.

Episode grade: B

New Girl - "Wedding"
Jess lost a lot of her inconsistency this episode! It was also a good plot. Nick took Jess as his date to a friend’s wedding, because he was worried about running into his ex. Gretchen and Schmidt were hilarious. The weakest plot was the one with Winston trying to be a great usher. We like the actor, so the show should give him something funny to do. We really, really loved Jess’ British accent (the “slut butler,” haha), and we like the developments between Jess and Nick. We want Jess’ hair so badly. Also, the slow-motion chicken dance? Amazing.

Episode grade: A-

Community - "Competitive Ecology"
The Chang stuff was not funny. The group fighting is getting old. We like when the group is united against something else every once in a while. We enjoyed Todd and his reactions. Hopefully he gets his revenge or something. Overall though, while this episode wasn’t terrible, it is not an example of why we love this show.

Episode grade: C+ But please, don’t let that deter you from watching this show. We never miss it every week, and its numbers aren’t great. So, please watch it.

Parks and Recreation - "Born and Raised"
We loved the riffing on the Obama birth certificate controversy. Pawnee has turned into a bunch of birthers, and poor Leslie is from Eagleton! We love how every single character on this show is both funny and necessary. This episode was sweet and there were multiple chuckles to be found. Leslie and Ben’s sad gaze at each other near the end was just whipped cream on the waffles. This season is great so far. If it had been this good in its first season, this show would probably have The Office's ratings.

Episode grade: A

South Park - "Ass Burgers"
South Park is really hit or miss lately. Wait, who are we kidding? That show has ALWAYS been hit or miss. For every episode that we remember and quote forever, there is an episode that makes us just ask why, God, why. (A Million Little Fibers) This one was actually pretty good though. We loved the implication that adults drink to make the world fun again. It’s about time Cartman (mis)heard about Asperger’s Syndrome. And, of course, South Park jumped on some sort of current event. This time they were mocking the vaccination controversy. We enjoyed their send-up of Adam Sandler and Terra Nova (It’s LOST and Jurassic Park in the same TV show!), the Duck President is still hilarious, and we liked the way the episode ended on a hopeful note for South Park. In the last episode, Matt and Trey had us wondering if they were sick of making South Park. In this episode, they assured us that they love what they do and are thinking of new possibilities for it.

Episode grade: B+

This Week's Shows Short Comments Part 2

Spoiler warning

South Park - Funnybot

After a relatively strong season opener, South Park fell back to mere loud, unfunny commentary in this Comedy Central-lampooning episode about how lame both comedy awards and Tyler Perry are. We did think the robot saying, "Awkwaaaard" was funny though. People who say that often need to be shot. But seriously, was this episode written by Germans or something. Not up to snuff, humor-wise. Was it the lack of much Cartman? Episode grade: C-

Modern Family - Mother's Day

Is anyone else tired of seeing Jay be so mean to Phil? Phil is the BEST. The show wasn't as funny as usual this week, although we continue to love the chemistry between the children in the cast. Episode Grade: B-

America's Next Top Model - Daniella Issa Helayel

Alexandria got the boot! Her control issues started coming out in her face, her picture wasn't model-esque, and she was sent home. Despite complaining, boasting, cursing, and anger issues, Molly got best photo. Because of her talking heads, we don't think she's going to win though. With only a few girls left, it's safe to start betting on the winner. Our money is on Brittani. But will anyone care to keep watching now that this season's most polarizing and entertaining contestant is gone?

Episode grade: A-

Cougar Town - Lonesome Sundown

The first half of this episode was weird and a little too immature. The punishments and Jules on the boat were kind of a drag in the beginning. But those things turned out well. Then CT brought the heart along with the humor when Travis got shot down by Kirsten and sat with his mom and Grayson in the aftermath. Bittersweet episode. And we think Travis' roommate should sing more on the show.

Episode grade: B+

Community - A Fistfull of Paintballs

Josh Holloway! We've missed you. No time to cry for LOST though, because the episode launched right into the action - another Community paintball war. And this time, it was bigger and bolder than ever. How awesome was Annie? How fun is this show to have one of its main characters (Pierce) become so villainous? This is a two-parter, and we can't wait for the second installment. Lots of fun and humor.

Episode Grade: A-

Parks and Recreation - Eagleton

Parker Posey guest starred, and she was pretty great playing a rival of Leslie's. The real fun of this episode was Ron Swanson's birthday and the funny way that played out. This show has such a sweet spirit.

Episode Grade: A-

The Office - The Inner Circle

Michael is gone and he left us with the worst possible replacement - Will Ferrel. Ugh. In this unfunny episode, Deangelo acted crazy and then got hospitalized for showing off. We're pretty sure that's the end of him. Good riddance. We need a FUNNY new boss to carry this show.

Episode Grade: C+

Grey's Anatomy - White Wedding

Continuing its streak of predictability this season, Grey's had Callie and Arizona get married and so did Meredith and Derek (so they could adopt a baby...yawn, even though it's the cutest baby ever and we love seeing Derek with it). We liked the way Callie's mom wasn't demonized for having a religious belief that would cause her distress regarding this marriage. There are homophobic people and people who believe that homosexuality is wrong. Even if we disagree with both groups, there's a difference between them. Callie's parents have their beliefs, but it's clear they love her, and we loved when the dad came back for the father-daughter dance. Great timing, huh? The rift between Teddy and Cristina grew, because Cristina wouldn't apologize for doing nothing wrong, and Teddy has made up a "teaching reason" why Cristina should be off of her service. Owen proved to be an ineffective mediator. We hope Teddy goes off with her shrink boyfriend to a foreign hospital soon. The best moment of this episode was when Stark recommended April for chief resident. That was sweet. The next episode looks better.

Episode grade: B

The Vampire Diaries - The Sun Also Rises

Oh, this show. This was a real downer, but in the best way ever. Who knew that we would be so sad over Jenna and John? Wait, who is going to take care of the kiddies now? We're upset that Matt, after showing so much sack in the past two weeks, decided that he couldn't handle the supernatural stuff and went back to his mundane life of "paying bills." We want a serious triangle between Matt, Caroline, and Tyler. Matt had better get it in gear. As usual, Stefan, Damon, and Elena are awesome. Bonnie is growing on us. We did not predict the end. How on earth are they going to be able to wrap up enough in one episode to give us a satisfying finale? We know there will be a cliffhanger, but we are praying there's SOME closure to the events this season. It's hard enough to wait for this show to come back as it is.

Episode Grade: A

The Human Centipede

Because of last week's South Park, we will be watching The Human Centipede together. We hear it is the nastiest thing ever. We will let you know. It's on Instant Netflix, and as we've said before, we will watch anything on Instant Netflix.

Place your bets on who will get grossed out and turn it off first.

South Park - The HumanCentiPad

Was South Park too disgusting this week?

Kyle’s mouth was fastened to the anus of an Asian man, and a woman’s mouth was, in turn, surgically fastened to Kyle’s anus. When the Asian man ate, well, you know. This was a scheme by Apple to turn the three humans into a hot new device that would put their newest iPad to shame. The HumancentiPad. This is a parody of the movie The Human Centipede, which was also nasty.

The episode was pretty gross. Leeard almost vomited. But Ern laughed hysterically and loved it.

Kyle hit “accept” on an iTunes update’s “Terms and Conditions” without reading it. Who does? He signed over his rights to not be turned into the humancentiPad. Because of Apple’s location technology, the company was able to track him down, kidnap him, and force him to deliver. Mr. Broflovski had to go with Kyle’s friends to the Apple store “Geniuses” to get his son back. The parody of the nerds working there was pretty great.

The whole time, both of us were thinking, “Wow, Kyle’s dad is a terrible lawyer.” Contracts made with minors are voidable. Plus, those standard form contracts that you have to accept or you don’t get to use a product aren’t as enforceable as you think, especially if they get ridiculous. The courts will side with the consumer. But we digress.

The funniest plot for us was Cartman’s need of an iPad. His mother would only by him a Toshiba Handibook, so Cartman accused his mother of…uh…screwing him. Only not that word. When Cartman’s chance to own the Kyle-Pad device fell through when Kyle’s dad got his son back. Cartman accused God of the same thing he accused his mother of, so God struck him on the butt with a bolt of lightning.

Leeard did not think that the episode parodied recent enough things. The prank Apple pulled on the terms & conditions was last year, as was The Human Centipede. Ern loved it, because she’s not a huge fan of Apple. The iTunes store gyps you. Let us introduce you to a little thing called “Amazon MP3 Store.” It goes right into your iTunes, it’s cheaper, and you can transfer it to your computer without having to authorize the computer. Ern would take a Mac though…. That’s a special note for the random millionaire who might read this blog and wants to treat us :)

Leeard’s grade: B-
Ern’s grade: A-

Chat - Primarily on last night's Glee ("Night of Neglect")

ern (11:31:21 AM): Chode!
Leeard (11:31:32 AM): Yes, chode?
ern (11:32:01 AM): Tell us something entertaining
Leeard (11:32:12 AM): ummmmmmm How I Met Your Mother is pretty good this week, as is Cougar Town. And I watched this week’s episode of The Chicago Code again.
ern (11:32:55 AM): I forgot to call Cougar Town and order a penny can :-(
Leeard (11:33:05 AM): Way to go
(GLEE STARTS)
ern (8:01:08 PM): Offshore accounts! Oh Sue.
Leeard (8:01:53 PM): Umm so 5000 * 0.25 isn't 20000
ern (8:02:06 PM): Umm, so you're a nerd
Leeard (8:02:15 PM): Ummmm no, I’m just not a moron. I love Brittany
ern (8:03:08 PM): She's so obsessed with cats. All of her facebook statuses are about cats.
Leeard (8:03:12 PM): She's so amazing
ern (8:05:07 PM): Terri is pretty
Leeard (8:05:14 PM): I’ve missed Terri. UGH. Gwyneth Paltrow.
ern (8:06:20 PM): Gwyneth is here to butcher the hell outta ADELE
Leeard (8:06:34 PM): I’m seriously not looking forward to it
ern (8:06:50 PM): I'm looking forward to your comments about it, so suck it up and watch it. I think Gwyneth is good in this role, but it's a bad idea to ask anyone to try to live up to ADELE. Rachel needs to not have bangs. Ughhh, Will Ferrell is going to be on The Office for FOUR episodes.
Leeard (8:13:10 PM): ughhhhh. I don't like her (Sunshine) either
ern (8:13:35 PM): What a surprise, you don't like an arrogant person (sarcasm).
Leeard (8:13:58 PM): How is Sunshine Corazon arrogant?
ern (8:14:15 PM): She just bragged about how she was alone at the top and such a better singer than anyone. I thought that's what you didn't like
Leeard (8:14:39 PM): I started typing it before she said that
ern (8:14:48 PM): Why don't you like her then?
Leeard (8:15:23 PM): I don't like her voice
ern (8:15:40 PM): What don't you like about it? The range? The power? That darn clear tone? I want Jesse St. James back NOW
Leeard (8:17:00 PM): Freaking me too
ern (8:17:38 PM): I love Lauren
(A Thor commercial comes on)
Leeard (8:17:42 PM): THOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ern (8:17:46 PM): NERD
Leeard (8:18:05 PM): I'm okay with that
ern (8:20:15 PM): ok, The Vampire Diaries finale will feature deaths, duh, but I just read that they will be both "momentus and tragic." I really can't think of a single good character on that show that I can live without, except for Bonnie, and they won't kill her because they already did a fake-out
Leeard (8:20:43 PM): Or maybe it was foreshadowing? I kinda hope they kill off sheriff mama
ern (8:21:10 PM): Me too, but I wouldn’t call that momentous
Leeard (8:21:28 PM): Well, depending on how she died ....
ern (8:21:30 PM): Who is a character you think they might kill but really hope they don't?
Leeard (8:21:52 PM): I don't want to think about it. I don't like reading spoilers, and you already ruined it for me
ern (8:22:29 PM): Since when do you not like reading spoilers?
Leeard (8:23:06 PM): I read spoilers for, like, Bones, but not for shows that are crap-your-pants awesome.
ern (8:23:28 PM): This Emma/Will scene is hella-lame. Is anyone still into that couple?
Leeard (8:24:32 PM): Someone please tell Mercedes that she’s being stupid.
ern (8:24:41 PM): She's not. She should have a fresh puppy any time she wants
Leeard (8:25:04 PM): um no. Seeing as how they're trying to raise money, it doesn't make sense to spend money on her demands
ern (8:25:52 PM): Puppies are free at the shelter
Leeard (8:26:03 PM): no, they aren't
ern (8:26:16 PM): Gotta spend money to make money. I want to be carried to class in a giant egg. If anyone were to make that happen, I would do anything for them
Leeard (8:29:10 PM): oh, how did you like How I Met Your Mother?
ern (8:29:16 PM): Pretty good
Leeard (8:29:47 PM): i thought about texting you and saying "just watch the theme song"
ern (8:30:20 PM): For the record, after I finish watching the last Harry Potter movie, I am going to sob for about two straight hours. Grieving the end of my childhood.
Leeard (8:30:40 PM): I’ll probably be doing the same thing. Hopefully the midnight premiere won’t interfere with work.
ern (8:32:03 PM): Harry Potter > Work. PERIOD
Leeard (8:32:13 PM): !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BLAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE
ern (8:32:53 PM): I really have to hurry up the plans on that Darren Criss intervention I'm planning for you. I know who is going to be prom king and queen on Glee. Some extra spoiled it.
Leeard (8:36:05 PM): Don't tell me. I love Mike’s dancing. Also, this song.
ern (8:36:50 PM): "Meh" to both
Leeard (8:37:04 PM): He's so adorable though. But I wish Brittany had danced with him
ern (8:37:26 PM): Me too. I love HER dancing
Leeard (8:38:05 PM): ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Gwyneth’s version of "Turning Tables" is coming up. I don't want to watch. I want to change the channel after commercials
ern (8:38:28 PM): Please don't. Hate it with me. We so rarely get to hate the same things at the same time, with no arguing
Leeard (8:38:53 PM): Ha. Watch me love it. Just kidding. Obviously that will never happen. Charice, get off my TV!!!
ern (8:40:36 PM): Were you with me and __ and __ when we saw The Hangover?
Leeard (8:41:18 PM): mmhmm
ern (8:41:44 PM): oh yeah...you're the one who compared me to Zach Galifianakis' character.
Leeard (8:42:02 PM): That wasn't just me ....and I seem to recall you saying you'd memorize his wolf speech
ern (8:42:30 PM): And if we go to Vegas, I will
Leeard (8:44:51 PM): Rachel Berry, I love you. Why does Rachel get all the attention? BECAUSE SHE'S BETTER, MERCEDES
ern (8:45:35 PM): I think they are equally good
Leeard (8:45:46 PM): I think Lea Michele is better
ern (8:46:03 PM): I know you do, because your Lea Michele obsession almost rivals your Darren Criss obsession
(Gwyneth starts singing)
Leeard (8:46:28 PM): UGH. I HATE THIS. I WANT TO KILL SOMEONE. DON'T RUIN MY DAMN SONG
ern (8:46:42 PM): Nice orchestra. They brought out the big guns
Leeard (8:46:58 PM): …..To try to cover up her crap voice
ern (8:47:12 PM): Actually, I'm liking the way she does the verses
Leeard (8:47:26 PM): It’s not the WORST thing I’ve ever heard, but it's nowhere NEAR as good as the original
ern (8:47:47 PM): Dude, this is REALLY good
Leeard (8:47:51 PM): I disagree
ern (8:48:00 PM): I'm downloading it and replacing the Adele version
Leeard (8:48:08 PM): I’m killing you. Please tell me you’re joking.
ern (8:48:19 PM): HAhahahahahA. NO. I'm not, because I am duty-bound to disagree with you, no matter what. KIDDING. That was holler-y and lame. ADELE ftw.
Leeard (8:49:03 PM): Thank you. You whore.
ern (8:49:40 PM): That song was so completely unnecessary
Leeard (8:49:43 PM): I was seriously contemplating not talking to you
ern (8:49:50 PM): Why would the character of Holly Holliday sing at the kids’ glee benefit?
Leeard (8:50:11 PM): To make me want to cut out my ears
ern (8:52:43 PM): Why is Hollywood trying to make Emma Roberts happen?
Leeard (8:52:59 PM): Yeah, I don't know
ern (8:53:14 PM): I kind of liked her in "It's kind of a funny story." But I think it was just the movie/part
Leeard (8:53:34 PM): Wait, is Rachel not singing? Rude.
ern (8:53:39 PM): This had better knock my socks off, Mercedes
Leeard (8:53:44 PM): Love that dress
ern (8:53:49 PM): Me too
Leeard (8:54:48 PM): I don't think this is amazing. I'm kind of disappointed. Mercedes has sounded better. Wait. It’s getting better. She heard me.
ern (8:55:33 PM): Come on. Give us a big note. Bring it home.
Leeard (8:55:48 PM): I have faith. That was good. It wasn't great
ern (8:56:24 PM): It was ok
Leeard (8:56:34 PM): Rachel could totally follow that though.
ern (8:56:55 PM): I like seeing Rachel be nice, but I like hearing her sing more
Leeard (8:56:56 PM): Gwyneth just said amazeballs. MOTHEREFFER
ern (8:57:00 PM): so?
Leeard (8:57:30 PM): So, I like saying amazeballs and she just took that from me
ern (8:57:44 PM): hahahahaha I'm gonna start saying it too
Leeard (8:58:07 PM): please tell me that the Vocal Adrenaline director is going to come out of the closet
ern (9:02:22 PM): Are you gonna watch the royal wedding? I can't be bothered, even thought that Kate seems like a nice girl. I can just google pictures of the dress. Good enough.
Leeard (9:02:30 PM): I probably will, just to watch all of my dreams get dashed.
ern (9:03:03 PM): But that guy is an uggo
Leeard (9:03:11 PM): He wasn't.
ern (9:04:26 PM): SOUTH PARK SEASON PREMIERE APRIL 27
Leeard (9:04:32 PM): I KNOW
ern (9:05:28 PM): I didn't. I’m so excited. http://bangabledudesinhistory.blogspot.com/ I'm disappointed that we didn't think of THAT blog
Leeard (9:12:15 PM): I’m enjoying this website. There are some hotties
ern (9:12:30 PM): Surprisingly, yeah. I like the pie charts
Leeard (9:12:52 PM): I like this would-be assassin. He’s my type
ern (9:13:10 PM): He's not my type. I swear you can see the devil in his eyes. Like, he looks evil
Leeard (9:13:29 PM): That's part of my type
ern (9:13:35 PM): Really?
Leeard (9:13:45 PM): Usually
ern (9:14:40 PM): I know we've had this discussion before, but bad boys are a huge turn-off for me...unless they are Damon Salvatore. And that's mostly because Damon is funny. That had to be one of the lamest Glee episodes ever
Leeard (9:23:00 PM): It wasn't that great
ern (9:23:04 PM): Nope. I'm prepared to deliver unto it a C-
Leeard (9:24:40 PM): Ok
ern (9:38:33 PM): We are up to 8 cents (from advertising on the blog)
Leeard (9:38:37 PM): Whoa buddy
ern (9:38:57 PM): How are you going to spend your share?
Leeard (9:39:21 PM): I think I’ll invest it
ern (9:39:39 PM): Sensible. I'm gonna squander mine on gigolos
Leeard (9:39:55 PM): Maybe in 927408 years, I’ll have a dollar

That's about it. Oh, but that Glee spoiler Ern mentioned will be placed in the comments for all those who didn't see it on yahoo news. If you want to know.

South Park Season 14 Comes to a Close

It seems like the second half of season 14 just started (and it did). We say goodbye to South Park again after last night’s season finale and look back on season 14’s highlights.

This season was midly amusing, but not exactly legendary like past seasons. We hope that South Park steps up its game. It feels like the writers are losing heart, possibly due to censorship or burnout. They might be spreading themselves too thin, what with the Book of Mormon musical that is coming out. And it's been a while since Matt Stone participated as much as Trey Parker. They need to step it up next season. We appreciated the brutal killing of Justin Beiber, but come on guys, we expect more cleverness.

1) Medicinal Fried Chicken - Because South’s Park’s men bounced around the town on their huge balls.

2) You have 0 Friends - Captured Facebook perfectly

3) Crippled Summer - Made a parody out of Ern’s favorite Intervention episode. This episode was just so wrong. We don’t usually like when things aren’t centered around our four heroes, but this Towelie-centric on brought the laughs

4) It’s a Jersey Thing - Snooki want Smoosh Smoosh

Honorable mention: Overall, the Coon and Friends trilogy paid off, even if they were just “meh” week-to-week, and the first one wasn't funny. The Tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs was pretty funny too. In hindsight, we also like Poor and Stupid more now.

Season grade: B-

Checking in on South Park - Season 14, Episodes 11-12

These episodes only make sense if you saw an earlier South Park episode called “The Coon,” which is Eric Cartmans “superhero” alter ego. The Coon is pretty useless and kind of evil, yet hilarious. Like the real Cartman. The other superhero mentioned in that episode was M ysterion, a kid who is actually good at being a superhero, talks in a growly voice like Christian Bale’s Batman, and resembles just about every kid on the show. His identity was not revealed, which was disappointing.

But in episode 12 of this season (“Mysterion Rises,” a play on the name of the upcoming Chris Nolan Batman movie, “The Dark Knight Rises”), Mysterion turned out to be…Kenny! Wow, we finally got to hear the kid talk.

Episodes 11 (The Coon 2: Hindsight) and 12 were back-to-back episodes that told one story. The gist is this: BP caused the oil spill and then it caused rifts in the dimensional barriers. Monsters from other dimensions started cropping up. There was an ex-reporter superhero called Captain Hindsight who flew around telling everyone what they did wrong after the bad incidents occurred, which is pretty much what everyone did after the BP oil spill.

The Coon had recruited other kids for a team of superheroes called “Coon and Friends”. This included Mysterion (whose secret power is that he can never die), Iron Maiden (Timmy), Toolshed (Stan), Mosquito (Clyde), TupperWare (Token, whose last name is “Black,” by the way, haha), Human Kite (Kyle), and Mintberry Crunch (Bradley). Of course, The Coon ticked the group off, and they kicked him out but kept the name to anger Cartman. The Coon joined forces with an evil other-dimensional creature named Cthulhu.

We thought episode 11 (The Coon: Hindsight) was pretty average. We liked the shrimp guy (if you listened closely, you can understand what he is saying), and we also liked how the episode criticized people who judge others’ past acts with the benefit of hindsight without adding any real help to tragic situations. We also liked the very end where The Coon leapt from his window crying, “A**holes!” We watched these episodes on the internet (we always do, because we want the uncensored versions), and we hope this moment was not ruined for live viewers.

Episode 12 was superior because of the Kenny revelations. Also, there were more funny moments. We’ve never appreciated Kenny this much before now. This character just existed to laugh at when he died and to laugh at when he said really dirty things that we couldn’t fully understand. But poor, undying Kenny is actually a top-notch crime fighter with the ability to scare his parents into being better people? We like it. We also liked the re-introduction of the superheroes via monologues and comic pages. We enjoyed how South Park called Captain Hindsight “The hero of the modern age,” and the way Cartman used Cthulhu to fight the things Cartman finds evil (hippies, Jews, and San Francisco, naturally). We are also glad the show is back to recognizing that it once used to kill Kenny every episode.

A few references and things we caught regarding these episodes:-BP renamed itself to DP following the oil crisis on the show. If you didn’t get that, we can help you. DP stands for “double penetration” and refers to a sexual act. If you don’t know what that is, we can’t help you.
-According to a nerdy Web site (and one of the bloggers), the monsters from the dimensional tear and a few other things are references to stuff by the science fiction author H.P. Lovecraft.
-Showing the killer whale and Tom Cruise dead on the moon is a reference to earlier South Park episodes that only people who are completely obsessed with South Park would remember.
This show is definitely playing toward its longtime fans in these episodes.

We are sure that there are more references (the song playing while Cartman rode Cthulhu is tickling our brains), but we don’t know what they are, so holler if you do.

The Coon and Friends would make great Halloween costumes for next year. This blogger wants to be Mintberry Crunch.

Episode grades:
11: C
12: B-

Our Favorite Plots and Plots Twists On Some of Our Favorite Shows-- inspired by hatts' comment

SPOILER ALERT- We are about to give a lot of really good plot points away, so blur your eyes and move on if you haven’t seen most of these shows. We made a post complaining about bad plots on good shows, so it's only fair that we do a positive post to counteract it.

24, The end of first season - If you haven’t seen it, we aren’t even going to risk blowing it for you. Stephen King’s entertainment column blew it for Ern, and it took her a long time to forgive him for that. It helped that he’s awesome. Anyway, the one-two punch of the plot twists at the end of this show’s first season made everyone sit up and notice that this was a show that wasn’t afraid to do anything to its characters to shock and tell a good story. Honorable mention: Season five. Yes, the whole season.

LOST, the first flash forward - They have to go BACK? What?!?! They got off? No freakin way. One of us is still freaked out about this. The other blogger was spoiled. GER. Honorable mention: Ben talks Locke down from killing himself and then, once Locke says the wrong thing, strangles him. We were all touched that Ben talked his old enemy out of giving into despair when, suddenly, Ben murders him. Tell us you weren’t holding your breath during that entire, amazing scene. LOST had plenty of amazing twists (Locke’s in a wheelchair, the others aren’t savages, etc), but this one scarred us for life.

Arrested Development, Buster gets his hand bitten off by a seal - This one paid off in humorous spades. It was foreshadowed for at least half a season, and we will always chuckle when we think of Buster screaming, “I’M A MONSTER!!!!” It was one of the weirdest, best plots in Arrested Development history. Honorable mention: The Maebe/George Michael love, especially at the end of season two where they kissed and the floor caved in under them.

Sex and the City, The Big/Carrie affair - We were amazed at how this show handled adultery without making us hate Carrie for having the affair. It helped that she was super remorseful about it through the entire arc. The affair was exciting, we were heartbroken for Aiden (bonus points for bringing him back), and it ended without any Taylor Swift-esque romanticism or unrealistic TV fantasy. Honorable mention for this show: The entire Steve/Miranda arc. Also, Smith taking Samantha back after she slept with Richard and her final appreciation of Smith’s big-heartedness and maturity. The way the show had the four characters grow up and embrace parts of themselves that they had previously rejected was excellent.

Scrubs, The Dr. Cox/JD relationship - Turk and JD were hilarious, but Dr. Cox and J.D. were funny AND poignant. You know you were rooting for JD to finally get that hug. Dr. Cox’s love of JD and reluctance to get close him kept us crawling back to Scrubs for more of their great dynamic.

In Treatment, Paul does not sleep with Laura - So many people loved the Laura storyline, because she was hot and in love with her therapist. We found his struggle to resist her to be tiring, and the only thing we like about this plot arc is that he did not sleep with her in the end. We are also glad that the therapist in love with the patient thing is over and done for this show. Now we can get to interesting patients like Sophie, Walter, April, and Oliver, which are this blogger’s personal favorite patients. Once a patient on this show gets under your skin, their episodes become an addiction. You can just watch these four and get a nice experience with this show. Speaking of this show, it’s back on now, and we are watching. It’s fantastic because it keeps you glued to the screen just through two (usually) good actors talking to each other for 22 minutes.

Friends, Monica and Chandler hook up at Ross’ failed wedding and start a relationship - Did you scream back in the ‘90s when Chandler and Monica popped up in the same bed the morning of Ross’ wedding? We did. That relationship kept life in the show long after it started being more soapy than funny. “The One Where Everybody Finds Out (about the relationship),” was one of the funniest Friends episodes.

Gilmore Girls, Rory doesn’t marry Logan at the end - If she wasn’t going to be with Jess at the end (we know, we know, most of you disagree with us in our Jess love), we were glad that the show left her life open-ended and didn’t have her be “the little woman” to a rich, hot guy. The way Rory’s life journey was just beginning was a nice thing on which to end the series. Lorelai, on the other hand, had closed many chapters of her life, ended up with the right guy (at the very, very end), and was in a stable career that she loved, which is how we wanted to leave our flighty, high-spirited heroine. Honorable mention: Anything with Kurt.

Alias, Sydney and Co. bring down SD-6 in the middle of season two - Way to not drag out a plot, show. We love when that happens. When the SD-6 thing was dragging, the show knew how to shake things up by freeing the characters from their double-agent statuses and moving on to other fish. Honorable mention: The pilot of this show is one of our favorites.

Dexter, The Trinity arc - DUH

Gossip Girl, season two Chuck and Blair - Chuck and Blair falling for and eventually committing to each other was the high point of this show for us, by far.

Glee, Sue trying to take Will down - Let’s face it: plots are not Glee’s strong suit, especially this season. We like the songs, the messages of inclusiveness, the tone, the individual characters, and the jokes. But one thing the plotters got right is having the enemy of the arts NOT be just some parent who doesn’t understand/wants his son to play sports. That is tired, and it was already done on High School Musical. Having the bad guy consciously, evilly attempt to sabotage the rival group was pure genius. Honorable mentions - Puckleberry. Bring that back, show. Also, Tina's goth look. Maybe this doesn't qualify as a plot or a twist, but we like it. Just sayin.

The Vampire Diaries, Everything on the show - This show is just one good plot point and plot twist after another. We can’t even count the times we’ve gasped while watching this show. At least once per episode. An episode that stands out for Ern is the one where Stefan tried to stop drinking any blood, hoping that he would die. Lots of young people struggle with depression and suicidal thoughts, and this show lightly touched on this subject in this episode in a powerful, touching way. Stefan’s final decision to fight and keep trying sent out messages to teens that this was the strongest decision he could have made for himself and his loved ones. Message episodes can get heavy-handed and usually makes our eyes roll, but this one toed the line between profound and preachy perfectly. This is the episode in which the show garnered Ern’s respect. Leeard loved the season one finale and the season two premiere, as well as the most recent episode. Actually, Leeard is obsessed with every episode of this show, haha.

The Office, Jim and Pam’s budding romance - Obviously the best plot on this show was the early Jim/Pam dynamic. Roy treated Pam like crud, and Jim treated her with respect and affection, providing a contrast that was meaningful, funny, and edifying of nice guys everywhere. Honorable mention - Dwight and Angela, Holly and Michael.

The United States of Tara, The appearance of the feral alter, Gimmee - Gimmee is horrific and hilarious at the same time. It really shows how out-of-control and serious Tara’s mental illness is. When we first saw it, we muttered, “What the hell?” It’s a shadow of what must be a hideous and frightening past. We are still watching this show because we wonder what sort of events could have created something as weird as Gimmee?

South Park, The Kyle/Cartman relationship - The greatest part of this show, for us, is seeing these two war against each other season after season. These two are foils, and their hatred for each other combined with some sort of obligatory friendship always entertains. For Leeard, the best single episode plot twist HAS to be when Cartman fed Scott Tenorman his parents. Looking back, it's pretty predictable, but MAN was it shocking the first time.

Grey’s Anatomy, the Addison/Derek/Meredith triangle - No triangle on this show will ever rival this one. It gave the show a core issue that everyone was invested in. It was good because we loved both women. Addison was cool! Her relationship was doomed, but we were sad to see her hurt. And yet… Honorable mention - The first half of the Hunt/Cristina relationship. Watching them fall in love in season five was riveting. We had the choking, the way they didn’t fall immediately into bed together, and the way it softened Cristina and showed us another side of her. Sandra Oh rocked this plotline, and we think it overshadowed the disaster that was the Dead Denny season five plotline (no mean feat).

There are so many more. Give us yours?

Weighing In On Two Controversies: The Glee Photo Shoot and Violence v. Sex, What's Worse?

The Issue at Hand

So, as you all probably know by now, Lea Michele, Dianna Agron, and Cory Monteith (all of Glee fame) did a photo shoot for GQ magazine where Lea posed like a super slut in her underwear and Dianna showed her midriff, while Cory Monteith got to be covered up, because he is a guy. We don’t recommend it, because you can understand what is going on without seeing these, but you can see the offending photos (and a great observation about how DESPERATE the photo shoot comes across) here: http://www.dlisted.com/node/39304

Seriously, Lea Michele looks like she is about to burst into flames from the effort to look as much like a porn star as possible. Way to try too hard. Tasteless. Do the readers of GQ even watch Glee? Does Glee really need the publicity? (No.) The Parents Television Council/Committee/whatever (some conservative TV watchdog group) condemned the shoot, saying that because it was shot in a high school and featured the whole schoolgirl fetish thing that it bordered on pedophilia. We think that since no one pays attention to the PTC, they had to say the most extreme thing they could to get attention. These girls in no way look like children, even if one of them IS sucking on a lollypop in a photo.

The Lame, “But It’s Not a Family Show” argument

But the PTC has a point. Defending the Glee stars, people have been saying, “It’s not a family show.” Our response to THAT is, “So?” Kids in high school and middle school watch it, and that’s a fact. That’s like saying Gossip Girl and 90210 aren’t aimed at children under 18. Also, when we say, “It’s not our jobs to police TV and society, it’s the parents’ jobs,” we are pretty much saying, “If kids have bad parents or no parents, that’s not our problem. We want to see all the sexy stuff we want without judgment.” It’s for this reason that this argument doesn’t hold much water for us. We all have to live in this society, and the public needs to draw ethical lines over what we tolerate and what we can do without. Anything involved with Glee sends messages to young men and women about what is right, what is normal, and what success looks like. Forget kids. Even if you celebrate freedom to the max, is it really beneficial for the grown men reading GQ to see photos like this? Do freedom and the almighty dollar outweigh our interest in having a society where women are not props like this? Even regular adults groaned at this shoot, and we think we know why. It’s because the shoot is contrary to what the show stands for and why we love it.

What’s worse, sex or violence on TV?

These bloggers don’t really mind sex, nudity, violence, and language in our TV shows. All you have to do to notice that is to look at the variety of shows we watch. But you might be asking, “Hey, we’ve read scolding and hints of conservatism on this blog. What gives?" What we DO care about are the messages the show carries. For example, we loved Sex and the City, because although there was plenty of carefree sex, in the end really connecting to another person, commitment, friendship, forgiveness, and actual intimacy won out. We think parents and discriminating viewers should worry just as much about the messages in the media as the content. And hey, people are dehumanized when they are NEVER the object of lust as well as when they are ONLY objects of lust. You have to find a balance. This is why we slam violence so much more than sex. No one is humanized by violence. For us, a good, true message can overcome bad content. See: Any episode of South Park.

Betraying the heart of Glee

Glee has been described as a positive, wholesome show. This has nothing to do with its content. It features sex, drugs, and light cursing, and is not squeaky clean at all. Glee’s wholesomeness does not come from its content, it comes from its message. The show is about diversity, underdogs, and being confident in who you are. This is what the photo shoot violates. Glee whipped out its whitest, skinniest stars, took off their clothes, and slapped them in a men’s magazine. This exploitative, weird photoshoot celebrated the status quo and young women looking stupid. Also, notice how they turned Lea’s face in most shoots to hide her unique facial features, particularly the nose.

Thoughts on the actors involved

On her blog, Dianna Agron wrote a response to the outcry over the photo shoot, and it was articulate, humble, wise, and pretty awesome. We like her a lot better now. You can read it and follow Agron’s blog here: http://felldowntherabbithole.tumblr.com/ Dianna admitted that the shoot wasn’t her favorite idea, but she didn’t walk away. As for Lea Michele, there is no doubt that she is an ambitious girl willing to do anything to succeed in showbiz. In this, she is like her Glee character, Rachel. Lea showed her breasts on stage night after night in the musical Spring Awakening, and she has the raciest poses and outfits in the photo shoot. Also, she has jumped right in line with Hollywood’s hellacious body standards by losing a lot of weight between seasons 1 and 2. This disappoints us, because she is one of the most gorgeous and talented people on TV today. After Glee, she will probably always be successful, and she has a steady job. We don’t know why she thinks she needs to do stuff like this. It saddens us that her beautiful voice isn’t enough. And Cory, you could have said something or done something too. Call us prudes, but we don’t think this shoot adds anything good to the world or to TV. It’s sexist, desperate, and dumb.

It’s a world playing to the lowest common denominator. Be careful what you see.