-books -dates -Lists -Movies -Music -musicals and broadway 24 30 Rock 666 Park Avenue Alcatraz Alias America's Next Top Model American Horror Story American Idol Americans Are You There Chelsea? Arrested Development Arrow Awake Awkward Bates Motel Being Human Ben and Kate Bent Best Friends Forever Better with You Big Bang Theory Big Brother Big C Big Love Blue Bloods Boardwalk Empire Body of Proof Bones Borgias Boss Breaking Bad Breaking In Breaking Pointe Bridge Bunheads Camelot Carrie Diaries Charlie's Angels Chicago Code Chicago Fire Chuck Community Continuum Copper Cougar Town Cult Dark Tower Deception Defenders Degrassi Dexter Doctor Who Dollhouse Don't Trust the B---- in Apartment 23 Downton Abbey Elementary Emily Owens MD Enlightened Episodes Event Fall Falling Skies Family Tree Felicity Finder Firefly Following Fosters Freaks and Geeks Friday Night Lights Friends Fringe Game of Thrones GCB Gifted Man Gilmore GIrls Girls Glee Glee Project Good Wife Gossip Girl Grey's Anatomy Grimm Hannibal Happy Endings Harry Potter Hart of Dixie Hawaii Five-O Hell on Wheels Hellcats Hemlock Grove Heroes Homeland House House of Cards House of Lies How I Met Your Mother How to Be a Gentleman How to Live with Your Parents (For the Rest of Your Life) I Hate My Teenage Daughter In Treatment Intervention Jane by Design Jersey Shore Justified Last Man Standing Last Resort Life Unexpected Lone Star Longmire LOST Louie Lying Game Mad Men Make it or Break it Man Up Mindy Project Missing Mockingbird Lane Modern Family Mr Selfridge Napoleon Dynamite Nashville New Girl New Normal Nikita Nine Lives of Chloe King No Ordinary Family Off the Map Office Once Upon a Time Originals Outlaw Outsourced Pan Am Parenthood Parks and Recreation Perfect Couples Person of Interest Playboy Club Pretty Little Liars Prime Suspect Psych Raising Hope Real Housewives of New Jersey Revenge Revolution Ringer Rob Rookie Blue Running Wilde Saving Hope Scandal Scrubs Secret Circle Secret Life of the American Teenager Sex and the City Shameless Sherlock Smash So You Think You Can Dance Sons of Anarchy South Park Southland Suburgatory Supernatural Switched at Birth Teen Wolf Terra Nova The Fall The Fosters The Killing The River The Voice Touch true blood Twisted Two and a Half Men Two Broke Girls Under the Dome Unforgettable United States of Tara Up All Night V Vampire Diaries Veep Vegas Veronica Mars Walking Dead Web Therapy Weeds White Collar Whitney Whole Truth Wilfred Work It X-Factor X-Files Zero Hour

Monday, January 31, 2011

Movies We Hate

Ern just watched a dud of a movie. Eat Pray Love. Leeard warned her not to do it, but Ern did not listen. It was loooooong, boring, shallow, stupid, and lame. Note to Hollywood: Watching someone travel to find themselves isn't as entertaining as you would think. It's much better to do it. This should have been called "You Had to Be There-- The Movie." Ern will never betray Rotten Tomatoes again...

It's going on the list of movies we hate, along with Doomsday (listed first for a reason), Natural Born Killers, Alexander, Mean Girls 2, any Fast and Furious movie, Lucky Number Slevin (Leeard actually enjoys this movie. Ern just hates revenge, unless it's done by Tarantino), The Ultimate Gift, The Bounty Hunter, Kingdom of Heaven, The English Patient, Seven Pounds, The Last Samurai, P.S. I Love You (Leeard loves this movie. Ern note: WHY?), Cop Out, The Da Vinci Code, Happy Feet, Hachi, Before the Devil Knows You're Dead (Ugh, more revenge. Grace is so much more core-rocking, thus, Les Miserables being the best musical ever), The Ugly Truth, A Very Long Engagement, Mr. Brooks, Repo Men, The Day After Tomorrow (Leeard likes this movie, too), Avatar, Hitman, Good Luck Chuck, Law Abiding Citizen, Crank, Beowulf, Miss Congeniality 2, Shrek the Third, Australia, Midnight Express, Ultraviolet, the latest Indiana Jones movie, the last two Pirates of the Caribbeans, the Planet of the Apes remake, The Number 23, Blue Velvet, The Diving Bell and the Butterfly (a technically "good" movie that made one of us fall asleep four times), Mary Reilly, Made of Honor, The One, Wanted, A Night at the Roxbury, Swept Away (or really almost any movie starring Madonna), Battlefield Earth, The Hottie and the Nottie, From Justin to Kelly, any Tyler Perry movie (except for I Can Do Bad All By Myself, because that was watchable), Down With Love, Primer (why make a movie where no one is going to care and 90% of the world won't understand it? It's just a bunch of nerds showing off), Daredevil, Catwoman, Eragon, and the latest Die Hard. The action was just too unrealistic to even suspend reason long enough to enjoy it. Has anyone heard of the laws of physics? And 87-pound Maggie Q could not throw a man around like that. (Leeard loves this movie with her entire heart. Ern put this on the list and Leeard disapproves. But hey, Ern likes Madonna, so we're even).

The above movies are dead to us.

Oh yeah, and Donnie Darko. We know, many of you want to shoot us in the face for saying that. But we will live our whole lives and never get the hype with that movie. Also, A Clockwork Orange and Million Dollar Baby are movies that one of us doesn't care for, even though they are revered. One of us LOVES A Clockwork Orange. We do actually have different tastes sometimes. About 5% of the time, but each of us feels strongly about the stuff in that 5%.


  1. I agree with you on most of those, and I think so does everybody who has remotely decent taste. But some exceptions: I did like Seven Pounds. And I also liked The Day After Tomorrow - I know, I know, but I have a thing for apocalyptic movies. I didn't hate Australia but I wouldn't watch it again. I really did enjoy the latest Die Hard though, and I've seen it several times. And you're still very wrong about Donnie Darko.

    TOTALLY agree about the last two Pirates of the Caribbeans and Made of Honor.

    There are 6 pages of movies I've rated on netflix that have only 1 or 2 stars, so I won't list them all here. There are a lot of movies I hate that everyone else loves, but I have an atypical sense of humor. I think Zoolander and Anchorman are lame, so that gives you an idea. I also loathe about 4 out of every 5 romantic comedies.

    Just a few movies that were notably an utter and complete waste of my life:
    Little Black Book
    Dear John
    You Don't Mess With The Zohan
    Year One
    Ghost Rider

  2. Agree with that list of six. Totally a waste. Year One wasn't as bad as this blogger thought it would be though...

  3. Rereading your post, you guys should really give Tyler Perry movies a chance. Yes, they're SUPER cheesy, but they're uplifting. And how can you not love Madea?!

    Curious, what did you guys think of Precious? Because I thought it was SO SO SO SO SO OVERRATED!!!

  4. One of us edited to include an exception to Tyler Perry movies. They DO have good messages.

    Precious? Thought it was hilarious. The appeal of Precious was it made people focus on a person that the world would generally write off as unworthy of notice. That's nice. Leeard likes the book version (Push by Sapphire).

  5. One blogger has given Tyler Perry two chances, and he blew them both. No more. Dear John was exactly what everyone thought it was going to be, so one of us didn't hate it. It's not great, but you get what you expect from a Nicholas Sparks movie.

  6. Tempted to put "A Walk to Remember" on this list. Good soundtrack saves it though....

  7. Best thing ever about Tyler Perry? This clip from this week's Saturday Night Live:

  8. Also, one blogger HAAAAAAAATES the "torture porn" movies, like Saw and Hostel. That trend is starting to die off though, so no more griping about it....except for this one comment.

  9. And the other blogger loves those kinds of movies.

  10. If people want to watch a movie that focuses on a person that the world would generally write off as unworthy of notice, I can recommend several movies that are FAR BETTER. I think that's what irritated me so much - it's supposed to be all moving and triumphant or whatever, but I've seen many, many movies about people in equally awful situations - and those movies are MUCH MORE moving.

    Only 2 chances for Tyler Perry? What about 3 strikes? Have you seen Diary of a Mad Black Woman? James loves that movie because it's so very Atlanta. And Madea is AWESOME in that movie.

  11. Okay, one of us MIGHT give I Can Do Bad All By Myself a chance because the other blogger recommended it (and because it's on Instant Netflix). People normally get 3 chances, but the first was so bad he was lucky to get a second shot.

  12. I dare you to watch this and not laugh:

  13. And if you're only going to give Tyler Perry one more chance, it should really be with Diary of a Mad Black Woman. I Can Do Bad All By Myself is decent, but it's not as good.

  14. This is the only time I've ever laughed at a Tyler Perry movie (and it was when I saw it during a preview):

  15. Do you ever hate a movie that's a solid B or B- because it gets too much hype? Slumdog Millionaire, anyone?

    I'm also with Mrs Potts on Dear John, but that one was my fault for thinking a Nicholas Sparks-based movie (that isn't The Notebook) could be anything other than horrific.

  16. I'm with Cat. Most of the movies that suck, just suck because people hyped them up so much. Dear John was a chick flick with no substance whatsoever, so was Made of Honor... it's why you watch it when you're in that mood.

    Then there are the ones that you just don't get. I saw Atonement and thought it was horrible. A friend convinced me to read the book, which was wordy but amazing, and since then, the movie was a million times better and I own it.

    Still, I agree with most of the movies on your list. I have a nice long list I'd like to add, but I'll just stick with this:

    Anything with Will Ferrel
    Anything with Jack Black

  17. As far as hype goes, that rarely ruins a movie for this blogger. Hardly ever believe the hype enough for that to ruin it, and also, once buzz starts building, we see it quick. The longer the hype goes on, the worse that get. For instance, this blogger saw Slumdog the first day it was in theatres and was able to enjoy it because of that.

    The movie that got both Ern and Leeard with the hype and didn't live up to it was "Inception." It was good, but not as good as we wanted it to be.

    While Leeard might sympathize with CurvyGirl sometimes being in the mood for a dumb chick flick that is not supposed to be great, Ern isn't ever in that mood. Ern watches chick flicks in the hopes of finding something like Clueless, Mean Girls, The Notebook, etc.

    Agree about Will Ferrel, except for Anchorman. Mostly agree about Jack Black.

  18. A sampling of mine:

    Eyes Wide Shut; what a dissappointment from Kubrik, one of the greatest.

    Hostel and Saw Franchise; if you find these entertaining you might be a sociopath or a time traveller from Ancient Rome.

    Star Trek: The Original Motion Picture; a disgrace to the franchise.

    Alien Franchise post Aliens; dreck...enough said.

    Exorcist II; arguably the best horror film of all time followed up by one of the worst...

    Halloween III; a Halloween movie without the main villian? Takes all the fun out of trick or treating just thinking about it...

    Spies Like Us; Chevy Chase and Dan Ackroyd making me cry, not laugh.

    Jewel of the Nile; Romancing the Stone was an awesome movie; this sequel is just plain bad.

  19. Heard horrible things about most of these, especially Eyes Wide Shut. One of us could not agree more about Hostel/Saw and the like. Those are for sadists getting their jollies, along with regular horror fans. Because of the first half of that crowd, just can't get behind it.

    We have been spared a viewing of most of these movies, and we will take your word for it. Most horror sequels suck anyway.

    We both liked the new JJ Abrams Star Trek though. He should make another.

  20. Liked Abrams version, too. The original Star Trek film, though, is a snooze fest.

  21. Slumdog Millionaire is one of my top favorites. Different strokes, I guess. Agree that Atonement was overrated, though. And I really don't like Will Ferrell much either (see earlier comment about Zoolander and Anchorman) but I'm hoping that he'll be good on The Office. I like Jack Black a lot though.