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Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Pretty Little Liars - Blood is the New Black

Spoilers contained for the last PLL episode.

Ella teaches the girls in school. Emily finds a teeth necklace.

Leeard: Dude! Hedda Gabler! Oh, junior year of high school.
Ern: I don’t think I ever read that. What is it?
Leeard: An Ibsen play.
Ern: I read some Ibsen in high school and didn’t like it.
Leeard: I did. We read a few of his plays.
Ern: That teeth bracelet is creepy. AND AWESOME.
Leeard: I think it’s a necklace, but yeah.

The girls go to the bathroom and accidentally flush the teeth necklace.

Leeard: Ha. Okay, so feel free to make fun of me, but when Aria said, “These things have sensors,” I totally thought she was saying that the toilets had alarms on them, not that it was an automatic flusher.
Ern: So did I!
Leeard: Hahahaha.

Jenna is back. Hanna lies to Caleb again. Aria tells Emily that Ezra will tutor her. Meredith is applying for a job at the local high school.

Leeard: Oh, Jenna, you’re a horrible fake blind girl.
Ern: Stop lying to Caleb, Hanna! He’s perfect. Clue him in.
Leeard: Yes, because clueing people in is a good idea on this show. /sarcasm.
Ern: Last time they clued Caleb in, it was fine. It’s a Caleb exception. Great idea, Aria. Throw another high school girl at Ezra, and one who is arguably prettier than you at that.
Leeard: But a lesbian.
Ern: Ha! I forgot for a moment. *feels like an artard*

Ezra and Aria meet in their car and force us to watch them kiss. Spencer meets Garrett again at the prison. He reveals that Jenna has a secret. We, as viewers, already know what it is.

Leeard: I’m sorry, Aria, what the hell are you wearing? It was like a jumper with layers.
Ern: I actually liked it this time, especially the bottom. And it was a dress. At least she didn’t over-accessorize.
Leeard: That we could see.
Ern: It's cool that the Liars are going to know Jenna isn't blind soon, since the audience knows.
Leeard: Mmmhmmm.

Hanna is visiting Mona again and she brings up Noel Khan. Then Hanna yells at her and Wren throws Hanna out. Ezra and Emily meet. Ezra tells Emily he’s sorry about Maya. Back to Wren and Hanna. Wren acts like a therapist. We don’t care for his outfit and haircut, but we still love him.

Leeard: Heyyyyyyyyy there Mona. Hanna, preach it, girl. Those are some insane earrings, Hanners. Seriously. I usually love everything you wear. Not today.
Ern: Agree. Way to bring up Maya, Ezra. He's so awkward. Who cares if you are sorry?
Leeard: But he's trying to show her he cares. Wren and Hanna. I ship it.
Ern: I want Wren with Spencer, but at this point, I will take him with anyone, even if it does break up my favorite couple. (Caleb/Hanna)

Toby and Spencer talk about Jenna and then make out. Veronica interrupts them, worried about Melissa.

Leeard: Toby, be my boyfriend. Toby, Spencer, have the sexxxxxxxxxxxx.
Ern: I think Spencer is prettier this season. I think she put on about six pounds and it made her face softer.
Leeard: She does look a little less harsh.
Ern: Man, Toby and Spencer are about two episodes from having sex.
Leeard: Thank God! Calm the f*ck down, Mrs. Hastings.

The next day, the girls are at school. Aria finds an earring that Ali found in Aria’s dad’s couch years ago. It’s one of Meredith’s. Aria flashes back to the time she and Ali trashed her dad’s office. Aria tells the girls that the earring is from Ali’s grave.

Leeard: Much better clothing, Hanna. Dammit, Ali is the best.
Ern: Aria's pink hair is the best. I love Goth Aria.
Leeard: This office trashing is awesome.
Ern: Aria! I can't believe she did that! I think I like her now. I love that the earrings are grave earrings. I hope the teeth are really Ali’s.

Emily and Ezra are studying together again. Jenna asks Aria to perform/play music with her and Aria turns her down. Caleb is starting to sniff the lies on Hanna. Veronica finds out that Spencer is visiting the county jail and confronts her, harshly, telling her to stop seeing Garrett. Hanna tells Caleb what’s up. Aria gets a text from A, threatening her about her father.

Leeard: Jenna is so freaking pretty.
Ern: I actually don’t think so. There’s something off about her face. Her forehead is, like, half bulbous.
Leeard: I disagree.
Ern: Once again, Hanna needs to tell Caleb about the Mona visits.
Leeard: Oh, Mrs. Hastings, I miss you being awesome. Like, I understand what she is saying. But still.
Ern: Yeah, that's not the way to talk to Spencer. She needs to reason with her and comfort her and ask her why she's really going there. You don't just shut down smart kids. Good job, Hanna. But I wish Caleb were reacting better. AWWW, he doesn't want Hanna hurt. He's so perfect.
Leeard: He really is.
Ern: I love the way Hanna said, "I'm not gonna have this fight." I loved the line delivery. He's going with Hanna?!! To that creepy place? So. Freaking. Perfect.

Aria tells her dad that she trashed the office. At school, Emily takes a test.

Leeard: I’m not going to like this scene (watching Aria talk to her dad). You SHOULD have called the police, Byron. I will not ever side with Byron on this. Not. Ever. Honestly, if I were Aria in this scene, I’d be a lot farther away from crying and I sure as HELL wouldn’t apologize to Meredith.
Ern: Me neither. He is, and always will be, the worst. Except when he’s fighting the Ezra situation. And helllll no. I would never apologize to Meredith.
Leeard: It’s not even that he’s the worst. It’s that cheating is the worst. If Aria murdered Meredith's cat or something, then she should apologize. And even then maybe not.

Caleb and Hanna visit Mona. Toby gives Spencer Jenna’s eyedrops, and Spencer realizes that Jenna might be able to see. Emily has a flashback to her time in the car right before she was found at Ali’s grave. Jenna was driving the car. Aria apologizes to Meredith, finds out that Meredith is seeing her father again, and returns the earring. Meredith says it isn’t hers.

Ern: What the heck?
Leeard: UNLESS YOU SAY, “I’M SORRY YOU’RE SUCH A B*TCH AND DESERVED EVERYTHING” in which case I would fully support the apology. Do. NOT. Apologize. To. Her. Dammit, Aria. Slap Meredith or something/go crazy again.
Ern: I’m liking Aria a lot better this season. Maybe it's that her fashions are better.
Leeard: I would like her a lot more if she hadn't apologized to Meredith
Ern: I guess it's what she had to do to get along with and placate her dad.
Leeard: I don't care.

Spencer is at the jail to visit Garrett again and sees her mom, Garrett’s new attorney. Wren meets Caleb at the insane asylum while Hanna is in the room with Mona.

Leeard: S*** Wren, shut up.
Ern: Seriously. Poor Caleb will be insecure now.

Ella sees that Emily only filled up half her test earlier that day and fills out the rest for her. Hanna did Mona’s makeup so that she looks a little less crazy. Mona says, “You’re getting them again, aren’t you? The texts.” The conversation is interrupted. Hanna goes and accidentally leaves Mona a pair of tweezers.

Leeard: Ella is the best.
Ern: Hanna needs to stop this. Visiting Mona is getting nowhere.
Leeard: Awww Hanna! Hanna is also the best. Oh, Mona. Ooooooohhhh Mona. Bitch crazy.
Ern: Finally, we get something good out of Mona. Uh oh, tweezers. Think Mona will pluck out all of her eyebrows? That would be great.

Ezra visits Ella and asks about Emily’s test. The girls spy on Jenna in the bathroom and find out she can see when Jenna picks up and inspects the earring Spencer left for her. Bitch can see. Spencer has a plan to use this information. In the last scene, A buys black hoodies and gloves.

Leeard: Ella is the beeeeeeeeeeest! Spencer is wearing a horrible dress, but she is the smartest person. Also, a literal crazy person.

Pretty Little Liars episodes are pretty consistent. If you like one, you’ll like most of them. We should just give them all an A, until quality declines or goes up to an A+. But we have to give grades, because that’s the rule, and this episode dragged out the blind Jenna stuff when they should have found out in the first five minutes.

Episode grade: B+. Extra points for the teeth necklace.


  1. Good episode. Not as good as some, but I still enjoyed it. But I really can't wait for next episode when Mona really starts talking. Should be interesting!

    1. They've made us wait long enough for it, haha