We didn’t realize Tara was that into the cross or Christianity. Seeing the cross made her forget her hunger, let her victim go, apologize, and leave. We’re all for a more religious Tara if it helps her be less angry. The angst is getting real old, y’all, and we’ve realized that Tara is probably on this show to stay. We loved her going to Sam for help though. It’s so easy to forget that they are friends. The best scene of the first part of the episode was Pam and Sookie fighting. We often have the same attitude toward Sookie that Pam does lately, so it was lame to see Pam lose the fight. But if it means Sookie is getting less useless, then we are okay with it.
We guess Newlin has a reason for being back: to be the new Nan Flannigan. It’s too on-the-nose that some of the vampire Authority scenes have Catholic church music playing in the background. Those scenes are also played a little too overdramatically. Maybe that’s to make things more fun and cheesy, but we aren’t digging it. Seeing Tina Majorino on this show nearly made this season good for us. We love her from the P!nk "F*ckin Perfect" video, Veronica Mars, Napoleon Dynamite, Andre, and Big Love. She’s lost a lot of weight, and we think she looked better with it. They gave her a decent line: “You guys are too cute to be goo.”
Don’t expect me to be waiting for you when you get back?!! DON’T EXPECT ME TO BE WAITING FOR YOU WHEN YOU GET BACK?!! Umm, Terry should be more forthcoming with his wife, but he is clearly going through something, and if you married someone, you should wait for them while they deal with their deep, dark army past. Terry has been really cool to Arlene and her kids for four seasons, and that should get him some kind of loyalty. Is the search for Debbie Pelt going somewhere? Are we supposed to feel tension from Sookie’s possible murder prosecution? Because we’re not. We know Sookie won’t go down for that.
The funniest thing in this episode was Andy’s naked body ending up on Facebook. At first, we were unimpressed with the Pam/Eric flashbacks, and bringing Bill into them didn’t help. It just emphasizes how much shorter Bill is than Eric. Bill, you have no chance in this show. Everyone thinks Eric is hotter, and that includes Sookie. We did like the way Pam forced Eric to turn her though. That was a good scene. How is the princess who had John the Baptist beheaded portrayed as a symbol of “dangerous female sexuality” in the Bible? True Blood added the sex angle, as usual. Salome danced, but there’s no proof that the dance was actually sex. She’s very pretty in the show, even though her accent isn’t exactly what we’d expect for the role. She’s sweet on Bill. We hope she’s gone soon.
We liked Nora’s reactions to getting tortured. It made us like her more. Jason reuniting with the older woman who apparently deflowered him is an interesting change from his usual love stories. She should be sorry. She started Jason on a path that led him to make many unwise decisions that put him in peril multiple times in the show’s history. We didn’t expect Jason to actually realize this though. But near the end of the episode, he realized he was using sex to fill a hole inside him, because he was taught at a young age to have and seek it. That’s really mature for this show, and we hardly believe it. But it’s true. Jason’s addictions led him to hurt his best friend. Jessica’s reaction was more helpful than we expected.
Tara spent most of the episode in Merlottes’ freezer, but when our “Lil’ Hooker” came out, it was worth it. She very nearly told Alcide what Sookie did to Debbie. That meant Sookie had to do it herself. Alcide was appropriately upset, especially that Sookie hid the news from him for so long. It looks like Sookie has no boyfriends this season. Tara sounds hilarious with her new vampire lisp. Demon Lafayette is back! We love that. He looks to be out for murder. Tara tried to end things in a tanning bed, but it looks like Pam is going to save her. This episode wasn’t slow at all, and that’s a good thing. It must have been the decent direction, because not much actually happened (as usual).
Episode grade: B