Glee - New York review

Last night’s finale was mostly about Rachel, story-wise. Except for the Finchel advancements and the glee club, predictably, losing at Nationals, not much really happened. What was good about this episode was that it resisted the urge to be too flashy. There was only one celebrity sighting to be found! It wasn’t one of those over-the-top episodes that most people have come to hate.

First things first: Quinn’s hair. We are so jealous that our hair won’t do that. Ern has had it that length forever and it just looks like a homeless woman’s hair. Her haircut made her ten times cuter.

Shortly after their arrival, the cast sang a mash-up of “I Love New York” and “New York New York,” which neither of us loved. We felt like they had to do a big tribute to New York number, but no one was going to like it. And Leeard doesn’t feel that way about New York. We both thought the song was “meh,” and just an excuse to show off their cute outfits and hair as they pranced around the city.

The best thing about Rachel and Finn’s date was Patti LuPone. She’s on our iPods, and we liked that she was so sweet to Rachel. We also liked that she didn’t completely take over the episode like some guest stars this season. “Bella Notte” was cute, but it’s not something we would put on our iPods. Ditto to “My Cup.” It was well into the episode, and we were feeling bummed over the lack of good music so far.

We loved Kurt in this episode. When he and Rachel are friends, it feels natural and sweet. We hope that continues and grows. Breakfast at Tiffany’s was a good way to further that relationship. Their version of Wicked’s “For Good” earns the award for best song of the episode, even though one of us hates Kurt’s voice (usually) and wished it had been Kristen Chenoweth reprising her role. The other one of us thought that would have broken the illusion that the Glee world is a fictional world.

Will was supposed to go on Broadway, but he decided to stay with the kids. No one is surprised, right? But wouldn’t it have been interesting if he left for a season and left the Glee club to be coached by now-ally Sue Sylvester? Or Emma? Or someone new? Sadly, he did not. He was content to sing one of Matthew Morrison’s lame adult contemporary songs. Dear Matthew, you are better at singing Broadway stuff, not adult pop. Your songs are lame, and that’s why no one bought them. It’s also annoying that Glee is trying to force his music career on us in such an important episode. Charice also sang a lame and boring song, but she sang it well. And how cute were her team’s dresses?

Onto the original songs. Way to procrastinate, kids. If we were in New York, about to perform songs we hadn’t yet written, we would freaking out, not sight-seeing and breaking into the Broadway show Wicked. Good show, by the way. It made Ern long for that trip to New York a couple of years ago where she got to see Wicked. So fun. Anyway, “Light Up the World” was catchy, energetic, and cheesy. “Pretending” was a little dull and unoriginal. It ended with a Finn/Rachel kiss that one of us thought was unprofessional and one of us thought was awesome and in-the-moment.

Jesse saw and was upset. We both love Jonathan Groff and one of us prefers Jesse to Finn, even when Jesse is being a jerk. At least when Jesse is a jerk, he’s aware of it and it looks intentional, unlike when Finn is a jerk. We think it’s unrealistic that Sam and Mercedes are dating, but we like it. We are sad the season didn’t end with Brittany and Santana getting together, but we are happy that Blaine said, “I love you.” Love Blaine. But we love his music with The Warblers more. Oh, why does he have to transfer to New Directions, show?

We’re glad the club didn’t win at Nationals, because they need something to shoot for in subsequent seasons. And it was realistic. The episode could have been funnier, had better songs, and had more happen though.

Episode Grade: B

Later today we will post a Best and Worst Moments of the Glee Season 2 entry. And this summer, we will cover the Glee reality show.

Why We Both Like "Make It Or Break It"

Sometimes, Ern likes to binge on a show that she has never seen right before the finale, in order to be caught up for the big day. Living up to our blog title, Ern watched two seasons of Make It or Break It in three days, and she was thoroughly entertained the whole time. Leeard was surprised. Leeard’s most trusted channels are AMC and ABC Family, so she’s been watching the gymnastics show for a while. But that kind of thing isn’t really up Ern’s alley. But it’s made the list of faves.

Here’s why we like the teen gymnastics show:

1) Make It Or Break It has actual substance and life lessons. We would seriously make our teenage girls watch this show, if we had them. There are lots of good, but not cheesy, plotlines about perseverance, honor, honesty, loyalty, leading, the obsession with success, the struggle for perfection, and self-respect. Example: Payson realizing that there is more to life than gymnastics and that she should keep trying and dreaming, even without her sports career.

2) On this show, as soon as someone does something wrong or has a secret, our first thought is, “It will be interesting when that comes out.” Because it always does on this show, more often than on other shows. But this “truth always comes out” mentality that the show fosters in its viewers is realistic. It is best to fess up, in your own time, rather than have someone like Lauren Tanner tell someone first…and make it sound worse than it is.

3) The tension can be horrifyingly thick for a teen soap. You really care, and during competitions, you are on the edge of your seat.

4) The villains. Lauren Tanner, a gymnast, is the most infuriating villain we have ever seen. She’s more evil than just about anyone we’ve ever seen on TV, followed closely by gymnastics big shot Ellen Beals. But sometimes the baddies are sympathetic. Within two episodes, you will be screaming at the screen at Lauren, desiring her slow death, but the next episode will have you tearing up on her behalf. Most shows with sympathetic villains don’t let them do truly unforgivable things. Not so with Lauren. She goes too far, all the time. And we love to hate her. You understand why she does what she does, but what she does is SO bad. We really can’t think of many characters more horrible and backstabbing than this girl…and it creates a lot of drama.

5) Like most teen shows these days, the show gave one of the girls a crush on her teacher. When looking at the fan sites, we saw that the teen girls, after watching the episode where the young gymnast kissed her coach (that ended on that cliffhanger), just assumed that the romantic relationship was on. They started debating the two as a couple. Rather than having him reciprocate and make the audience root for an abuse of power, the show had him react correctly and he even smoothed over the awkwardness with the student, restoring their working relationship. Aaaand that’s how it’s done, LUX and Pretty Little Liars.

6) Let’s get real here: Most Christians on TV or in movies are either simple, childlike, African-American angels or white, holier-than-thou monsters. We think that’s a little weird and racist toward both groups, but it goes overlooked most of the time. And those who practice abstinence are mocked and painted as having unrealistic views of how things work. We don’t think that’s fair. So it’s refreshing to see this show has an abstinent, white, kind, Christian adult woman. We kept waiting for her to turn into a two-faced stereotype, but she never did.

7) The gymnastics is fun to watch.

8) Cute boys, good parents, and lots of the men who are really good guys who respect the women on the show and act unselfishly, killing off yet another stereotype for young viewers.

9) The show’s tone is fast-paced, but its relationships aren’t. This isn’t like Glee where Finn breaks up with someone eight times a season. The couples stay together a while and take a while to get together.

Is this show immune to mockery? Absolutely not. In fact, we look forward to mocking it next season when we start covering it more often. Is it a work of art? No. Is it soapy? Oh yes. For instance, we both HATED the pregnancy storyline and we hope it ends soon. The best way to handle that on a show like this is to just have the girl miscarry. Can’t that happen, already? Leeard is upset that the show had her, a Catholic, kind of rooting for an abortion. Also, a lot of the twists and lines are incredibly predictable. And too many bad things happen on the show. If something can go wrong, it will, and it’s a little like watching that movie The Pursuit of Happyness. It’s mostly pursuit with little happiness. But it makes the happy moments all the more rewarding. In short, we recommend this show to teens, gymnasts, and young women, and maybe even their moms if they want to watch it with them. It’s a fun show, with more genuine drama than Gossip Girl and 90210 combined.

Finale Grade: B

Season Two Grade: B+

Season One Grade: A

One Year Later, We're Still Blown Away By The Originality That Was LOST

Today is the one-year anniversary of the LOST series finale, and boy do we miss that show. One year ago, Leeard, Ern, and two of our best friends went to a LOST party at someone’s house. We lived far away from each other, so a few had to travel, but it was worth it. One of our friends printed out “Dharma Initiative” labels and put them on all the food and drinks at the party. We were so obsessed. There was perfect silence during the show and loud arguing during the commercial breaks. Perfect. That was a good night. This post is a reminiscent one for all LOST lovers. Spoilers follow.

Were we mad that the finale didn’t answer all the questions? Do we still wonder how that bird was able to say Hurley’s name? Did we want something besides a good vs. evil redemption story? Not really. We think that everything the show didn’t explicitly answer can be figured out through thought and subsequent viewings of the series. Or they were questions that didn’t matter that much. Seriously, present us with a legitimate question about LOST that you are hopping mad that the show didn’t ever answer, and we will try to answer it. We are satisfied with what we know.

The greatest thing about the island was its mystery. Once you dissect that and lay all its guts out on the table, it loses its mystery. There are people who want answers to every question, but there are other people who just enjoy the ride and get that there are things, not just on TV but in life, that we don’t get spelled out for us. Grey areas are fun. They are playgrounds for the mind.

Plus, the finale was a wonderful emotional ending that was true to the show’s (sometimes cheesy) big heart. And it added a dose of spirituality that the show was famous for. We think the element of mystery and the spirituality and philosophy is what made it great. Because that’s what creeped us out and reached us on a deeper level than most shows. Hurley got the island, and the show gave hints as to what the characters did after the finale/before death, but didn’t explicitly tell us, leaving us full of hope.

Over time, we got attached to our favorite characters, but LOST’s themes were what really brought the heart. Leeard didn’t even realize she was emotionally attached to any LOST characters until Jin and Sun died together. It wasn’t the characters that made this show stand out (even though they were complicated and interesting and sympathetic). It was the themes. None of the other LOST copycats (Flashforward, V, The Event) GOT that. They just thought people wanted a sci-fi serial with some action and mythology. Not so. We want universal themes, well-articulated, that resonate with most people.

The characters had such rich journeys. Locke had never accepted who he really was. He wanted to be the hunter, the warrior, and the athlete. He wrongly picked the knife when he was a boy, he didn’t want to go to science camp, etc. He didn’t know how to embrace the kind of special that he was. The island gave him purpose...but, shockingly, that didn’t end too well for Locke. We were shocked that the show went there. It gave us this character that we hated, felt for, and were fascinated with. The show gave him so much to do and built him up. Then it killed him and his last thoughts were that he was confused? For a while. Jack’s journey from control freak to humble savior was annoying at times, but it paid off. Most of the characters could have carried a TV show all on their own, with just their own stories.

The way the show played with time was also a huge plus. The flashbacks that tied everything together and got us off that island. The flashforwards and sideways. Desmond’s mind hopping around his life. Who DOESN’T love time travel when it’s done well. It’s nerd heaven.

Let’s look at a few of our favorite things, characters, and moments from LOST.

1) That moment in the season three finale where Jack says, “We have to go back!” and we realize that we had just seen the future and they got off the island. Mind. Blown.

2) That moment when we realized that Locke had been in a wheelchair after that guy (rightly) told him that he couldn’t go on a Walkabout.

3) The episode “The Constant” where Desmond time travels and ends with a phone call to Penny. You know you cried, and if you didn’t, check your pulse, because you’re a zombie. For the most part, LOST could have done its romantic stuff better. We weren't exactly wanting to rip our bodices off watching this show. Desmond and Penny got to us, though, and so did Juliet and Sawyer.

4) Ern’s favorite scene in the whole series? The whole scene where Ben talks Locke out of killing himself only to strangle him. We don’t think we breathed through that.

5) Hurley. Just Hurley.

6) And Ben. Whoever thought we could care about a genocidal, jealous, lying, creepy, bug-eyed, cold, kidnapping dictator like Ben? But we did. Ben and Locke had the best material, as characters, and the actors delivered.

7) Those creepy numbers that we still know by heart.

8) All the daddy issues.

9) The episode where Michael kept trying to kill himself, but he couldn’t.

10) That some of them actually got off the island for good.

11) Feral Claire.

12) The episode “Greatest Hits” where the show actually managed to convince us that Charlie was a beloved hero rather than an annoyance.

13) The fact that Echo died (even though his death was really lame), because we found him boring, and he knew jack about Catholicism.

14) Every Locke back-story episode.

15) Every mention or sight of Sawyer loving reading or Little House on the Prairie. And all of his nicknames.

16) Creepy episode titles.

17) One of us also thought the pilot was extra good.

18) In the finale, when Ben asked Locke for forgiveness and they made up. So sweet.

And some things we didn’t like:

Walt (well, one of us thought he was useless), Charlotte and Miles, Nikki and Paulo, the Kate love triangle, the Bai Ling episode (obviously), Juliet’s sad death, that whole part of the finale where the goal was to unplug the drain and get the light back or whatever (we loved the finale, but that made no sense), the episode with young Jacob and his young brother, that they pulled a Sixth Sense on us for a whole season (they could have just created the final concert meeting place for the emotional ending. The sideways world could have collided with the island world in a different way, and that would have been more satisfying.), that manipulative episode where Sun had her baby, and the fact that The Others could have served a bigger purpose.

Overall, LOST didn't go with the regular TV formula, and for those looking for more than just quick entertainment after work, it was one of the greatest shows of all time. And we defend that finale.

A Look Back At Our American Idol Prediction Post

Hey, we picked the top two! We were so wrong about Thia and Haley though...and we are glad we were wrong, in hindsight. Haley turned out to be one of our favorites.

http://becausewewatchtoomuchtv.blogspot.com/2011/03/better-lock-them-doors-and-turn-lights.html

Game of Thrones About to Pick Up, Shock You, and Get Awesome

Raise your hand if you think it takes too long for things to happen on HBO's Game of Thrones? They talk, eat, occasionally kill an animal, and conspire. The atmosphere is often dim, dank, and dull. The show is so far lacking the spiritual, magical, and creepy elements that usually make fantasy interesting.

But we are shocked at how quickly the show is going. The books are very long and detailed, and the series is currently nearing the last 100 pages of the first book. We swear, it's about to get good. The series has even pulled things from the second book into the first book plot line already.

This is us: "NED ALREADY GOT STABBED IN THE LEG?!! VISERYS IS ALREADY DEAD?!!" It feels slow, because you don't know where it's all going, but rest assured, it's all happening. This isn't like Boardwalk Empire, another HBO show that kept us waiting, because this show follows the books closely, so we know what's coming and when. In Game of Thrones, anything can and will happen. There are surprises coming up. They will go there. And we can't wait until you see where "there" is.

Wasn't the death of Viserys satisfying? Also, we've decided that we like the TV series better than the books. It's fun to see it live, and it goes a heck of a lot faster. You think the TV series is slow? Try reading 500 pages of what has happened thus far. Zzzzzz. But the second and third books are much more eventful, and we want you to watch the show so that it has a chance to get further along in the story, because once it does, we think it's gonna be worth the time.

The Office, America's Next Top Model, and The United States of Tara

Photo credit: jeffedoe
Last week, two of these shows ended their seasons, each with decent, but not amazing, finales.

The Office gave us a string of possible bosses. When we first heard that Steve Carell was leaving, our first reaction was that Dwight or Creed should replace him, if the replacement was in-house. We are glad the show agreed enough to let us see those two in action, but Dwight’s stint as boss was too short-lived. This show needed to drag that out for about three episodes. We get that they can’t stay bosses forever though and we like the idea of adding some fresh meat.

But the parade of bosses we got in the season finale didn’t give us much hope. No one really stood out to us as a funny, memorable option, except for maybe James Spader’s really confident guy who thinks that everyone is just after sex. We can see that. We loved his showdown with Dwight. We think that the recipe for a good character is the ability to have a good showdown with Dwight. But this might not be the final boss shortlist. Maybe a totally new option will present itself this fall.

As for America’s Next Top Model, after one of the most entertaining cycle in a long time, the wrong girl won again. This cycle wasn’t great because of the photo shoots, prizes, or anything the show threw at them, it was great because the girls were catty messes who could model, for the most part. There was no one who was a terrible model. Every elimination felt too soon. Alexandria led hundreds of people to this blog, because people were so obsessed with her that they kept searching for her name on Google.

Between Brittani and Molly, we were Team Molly. We had supported Brittani for a long time, but when it became clear that Molly was a top contender, we started looking at her more closely. This girl could take great pictures, we really sympathized with her struggle with being adopted, and she had the model look. This girl could actually have a career as America’s next top model, rather than some eccentricity on Tyra’s shelf of misfits that she is trying to make happen.

Brittani, on the other hand, clearly has anxiety issues and her face is not symmetrical. Tyra praised her unconventional angles and said, “The modeling world is obsessed with symmetry, but Brittani proves that you don’t have to have that.” Umm, you don’t prove things to the modeling industry 99% of the time. Every once in a while, a girl breaks a barrier, starts a new trend, and gets by with a new look. But we doubt it is going to come from a reality show, which wouldn’t have the cool, elitism factor that the modeling industry would respect enough to make an exception for. But good luck to both of them.

Also, how mean of the show to cut both their hair man-short before sending one packing. New haircuts just for panel? No photo? Rude.

Lastly, for those of you who have not yet heard, Showtime canceled The United States of Tara today. We chalk it up to the show’s insistence on focusing on boring things such as Kate’s search for meaning in her life (at 18, this is really NOT a crisis yet) and Charmaine’s nasty men and her baby. Heads up to storytellers: While a baby is very exciting in real life, in fiction, it usually makes your story grind to a halt, unless the mother births some kind of mutant/monster or you grow it up quickly, like on soaps.

The reason we watched the show and stayed with it was Toni Collette’s acting, the alters, her relationship with her husband, and the craziness and hilarity that was the whole mental illness thing. By depriving people of what’s unique about the show and focusing on Kate and Charmaine, the show made people lose interest. Besides, Kate and Charmaine have lame attitudes most of the time. That said, we like Kate’s new flight attendant job. It has pulled her out of her useless funk. There is no saving Charmaine. Or, it seems, this show.

Hopefully, the show ends with some closure.

The Office Finale Grade: B

The Office Season Grade: C+, as opposed to the season before that, which would have gotten a D were we blogging then. We loved this season's Christmas episodes and Michael's goodbye.

ANTM Finale Grade: B-

ANTM Cycle Grade: B+

Community Ended Its Second Season Last Week

We just wanted to quickly comment on Community ending. The two paintball episodes that closed the season were perfect. We only wished that we had watched them back-to-back. We are getting a major girl crush on Annie, and it was great to see Josh Holloway from LOST again.

We’re interested to see the group with Chang in and Pierce out. We kind of wish that Chang was a teacher again. Pierce makes a great villain, so we can keep him that way. Britta and Jeff are secretly doing it, but the beauty of this show is that very few people care.

Because this show does not completely hinge on love stories. It probably hinges on pop culture references. But it’s funny and consistently watchable. The first half of season one was pretty rough, but starting at season one’s Halloween episode, this show has been one our favorite Thursday night comedy, and that’s saying a lot.

Finale Grade: A (for both paintball episodes combined)
Season 2 Grade: A

Grey's Anatomy Season 7 Finale

Well, that was depressing. More depressing than the shooting finale of last season. This gets us thinking: With the exception of season four, there has never been a Grey’s Anatomy finale with a silver lining. We should have been prepared for the doom and gloom, but we actually weren’t.

We are going to take a guess and say that Meredith and Derek are not over. He’s just mad and sleeping away from her for one night. That means they will bicker next season and get right back together. They will raise their Zola, and they may even get pregnant on their own as well.

Because what does Derek REALLY have to be mad about that is break-up worthy after all these years? That Meredith has a different view of morality than he does? Because she broke a hospital rule? Yeah, she was wrong, but it’s not relationship-shattering. We’re a little annoyed at the show for trying to make us think it is that big of a deal. But hey, at least Meredith has a plotline with some tension. It still heavily involves the chief, but we take what we can get.

Now Owen and Cristina? Before we discuss this, we feel like we should show you where our bias lies. This is a personal issue, but for the viewers at home, it's also a political and spiritual one. Just so you know what to take with a grain of salt, the blogger writing this is pro-life. But this blogger would ALSO not make it illegal in the U.S. to have an abortion. It can't be illegal. At this point, it just wouldn't work. And it's not the government's business (libertarians unite!). Back to Grey's: We don’t see how they can ever fix this, unless one of them caves. The sad thing about this plotline is that neither of them should cave. They are both right, in our opinions. She's brain right and he's heart right. Does that make sense? Cristina didn’t want children and Owen knew that when he married her. Cristina doesn’t want to be a mom. Love these hilarious lines, “I'm not a beautiful vessel for all that's good about the future. Are you getting all life-y on me?" She didn’t need to be thrown out of the house for not procreating though. We get that he was crushed, but he married Cristina, knowing about the no-kids rule, so he should have to keep her.

And as for Owen side, it’s a tad heartbreaking to see a husband begging his wife not to abort his baby. Just sayin’. And he even offered to be the stay-at-home parent. It's one thing to decide not to get pregnant. It's another thing to abort a baby the other spouse wants. Maybe scientifically, technically, or politically correctly, it shouldn't be different, but emotionally, it is. She also made the decision without him. We really believed his anger at the end of the episode. When she was walking away and he got up from his desk, a part of us thought he was going to punch her in the back of the head. Obviously, he didn’t, but he had to be thinking about it (if he weren’t fictional, obvs). This whole plotline was sadder than all of Meredith’s Alzheimer’s patients combined. It would help the show to have Cristina single and on the prowl again, but one of us really liked this relationship, especially in season five before Teddy came around to make one of the lamest love triangles in TV history. Owen softened Cristina.

But is there any way they can get past this? Is there any chance that Cristina keeps the baby but doesn't go back to Owen? Because it’s rare that a show that is so popular with so many grandmothers would have a character get an abortion. It’s not a common prime-time thing. One thing that might be interesting is seeing Cristina with a broken heart. As much as people liked Burke before he was thrown off, Cristina could only say “I love you” to that guy when he was asleep. She fell much harder for Owen. Except for the baby issue, Owen was very supportive and they went through a lot. We want Meredith to march down to Owen’s apartment and give him a piece of her mind, best friend style.

Onto Alex: He was genuinely sad that Meredith might get into that much trouble. It’s sad that he’s not living in the big, fun house anymore. He only meant to get chief resident, plus he was really drunk. We are happy about the departure of Lucy though. We didn’t like her much. But isn’t it about time that Alex got a woman who didn’t leave and who wasn’t crazy? Throw the guy a bone, show. Not that kind of bone. We’re talking long-term (at least a season) and healthy.

We’re happy for Henry (that Teddy kissed him), but does anyone like Teddy at this point? Or any point? Teddy shipped off to Germany with Andrew (rahhh) is just fine with us. But we guess that's not happening. We are happy that April got chief resident. We liked her this season, and she needs something to do. Lexie and Jackson walked off into the sunset, and we are happy to let them. Miranda and Eli went home together too. Unrealistic.

Lots to worry about over the summer, if you love this show. This has been a pretty great season, as far as soapy prime-time drama goes.

Episode Grade: B+

Season Grade: A-

Hellcats Was Cancelled!!!!!

No more Hellcats. We can continue to not write about it now. We saw this announced yesterday, but we just now decided to post about it, because we just remembered that some of you readers watch that show.

One of us actually really enjoyed this show, and is kind of bummed to see it go. Other than The Vampire Diaries, America's Next Top Model (and Gossip Girl), Hellcats was the only show on The CW that either of us watched.

Glee - Funeral review

Why would Mr. Schue hire Jesse as the Glee Club’s “show choir consultant” when the poor boy clearly needs to go out and get a real job? That job can’t pay too well. Still, we aren’t complaining much, since we like him and his voice. His cracks were true and funny. Dear American Idol: Hire Jonathan Groff as a judge instead of Randy, and have him judge as the character of Jesse St. James.

We loved how the audition idea just turned the episode into an excuse to just have one amazing solo after another. Our favorites were Santana’s and Rachel’s. One of us hates the song “My Man,” but Rachel just made her love it. If only all of her expressions during the song didn’t make her look like she was doing The Ugly Cry, because she looked like a troll during the whole number. Nice emotion, but can’t she practice looking pained AND attractive at the same time?

Mr. Schue totally ruined the plan of having Rachel sing every song at Nationals (yes, please!!!) by propounding his togetherness philosophy. No fun. We’ve already heard the original group songs they will be debuting next week. They are ok. Not as good as the last two. The group number is loud and annoying, shrill and twee. It’s called “Light Up the World” for heaven’s sake. Groan. The duet number between Finn and Rachel sounds like something that could grow on us, but we didn’t love it right away.

As for Sue dealing with the death of her sister: Ern TOTALLY called that death as soon as Sue kicked Becky off of the squad. It helped to know that there was going to be a death, but still. Let the record show: Ern rules. We think the show making Sue a good guy and friend of the Glee club is a mistake every time it does it. Part of what makes Glee great is its villain. But she saved the Glee club and NOW she claims to not be interested in terrorizing it anymore. We love that she has a soft side, but that side should be reserved for her sister, Jean.

Most of the Sue stuff this week WAS touching, but Sue’s letter that she and Will read at the funeral ruined an otherwise sob-worthy scene by being completely lame. The Willy Wonka theme was adorbs though. And one of us LOVES the song Pure Imagination. That might be our favorite cover. The best one we’ve heard is Maroon 5’s, but unfortunately they spliced several lines from an Obama speech into the beginning, middle, and the end. Whether we like Obama or not makes no difference. We don’t want a speech interrupting a perfectly nice song. Release a music-only version, Maroon 5!

Sue promised to embark upon a political career and join the House of Representatives, running for the Sue Sylvester American Liberty Party so that she can change the health care system because Jean didn’t get the free health care she deserves. That just doesn’t sound like Sue (the last part). Sue is all over the place and, this season, she hasn’t had much to do. We miss the Sue from the first half of the first season. Pure evil, out to take down the Glee club, full of one-liners, and with only a soft spot for people with Down Syndrome. Because those people are sweethearts, and no one could hate them and be tolerable. Terri moved away to Miami and said a sweet goodbye to Will. We will miss her, but it was a nice departure.

Finn and Quinn SO needed to break up. We know that there are actually people who want them together, but they are not us. Quinn needs to grow as a person, and we are starting to think that Finn should just go away. Maybe one of our readers is rubbing off on us, but he’s starting to be a bore. And Jesse is right: His singing is not up-to-par with the other guys’. It looks like Rachel is going back to Jesse for a second (which is how long Glee relationships last), even though he is clearly a douchelord and the show is gunning for her to end up with Finn. Finchel is a couple we are over, even though we were so into him in season one.

The other songs were “Try a Little Tenderness” by Mercedes, which was loud and straightforward, and “Some People” by Kurt. While we like Kurt’s drama and one of us think his singing has improved a LOT in season two, Jesse was right again. Linda Eder, Bernadette Peters, and so many more have killed this song, and this male version was the equivalent of those demo people on karaoke tracks. It’s time to retire the Gypsy songs, Kurt.

Episode Grade: B-

Glee - Prom Queen, a belated review

We don’t do weekly reviews of every show. Just when we feel like it. But we’ve never missed a Glee before last week. People were not pleased. Now we know which show is the most important to cover on this blog, haha.

So, for the first time ever, we will do a make-up post, even though it’s really late.

Let’s see…it’s been a while. Oh! We remember Kurt won prom queen (and Karofsky won king). We knew because of the spoiling extra, obviously. Kurt won as a joke though, and he stormed out and cried to Blaine. Then he went back in to make a statement, with the perfect line, “Kate Middleton, eat your heart out.” He should have done that in the first place! Sucked it up, done that, danced with Blaine (SO nice how he stepped up when Karofsky fled), and then gone out and cried. But we guess it’s more realistic that he didn’t handle it perfectly.

The Glee Club played at prom, and there were so many songs released to iTunes. Sadly, we didn’t like too many of them enough to download them. The choices were odd. What’s with this "Jar of Hearts" business? A boring, depressing, self-indulgent song that they played once on So You Think You Can Dance has been slowly taking over the world for a year now. They give us a Rachel solo and it was THAT one? Who wants that played at their prom?

Much more typical was “Dancing Queen,” which was nice, but we’ve heard that song and its covers too much. Unnecessary and uncreative. There was also Rebecca Black’s "Friday". One of us loves that song and one of us is ready for it to go away. We guess doing a Glee cover was fun, and making it all-guy was a good idea. Blaine sang, “I’m Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance with You.” We don’t like that song. Glee was working with little to begin with, so it was no surprise that the song didn’t make us want to…dance. Sorry. Couldn’t help that, haha.

Artie sang “Isn’t She Lovely” to Brittany in class, which was sweet, in theory. But after he called her stupid and after Artie has BEEN stupid for-frickin-ever, we were glad she turned him down for prom. Plus, that song IS about a baby. Ugh. Listen to lyrics, people. Rachel and Jesse sang a stripped-down version of ADELE’s "Rolling in the Deep". At first, we didn’t like it. We like ADELE’s big version. But then the song sat on our iPods for a week, and now we like the Glee version. Glee needs to get off of ADELE though and go back to some classic rock or lesser-known stuff.

Loved Rachel and Mercedes asking Sam to the prom together. We got to hear that Blaine had been beaten up at prom at his last school for going with a guy. Ok, we wish we went to that old school so we could beat the crap out of whoever did that. Seriously, Blaine is our favorite gay fella and we will cut a bitch who hurts him. So wrong. In fact, we will extend that ire to people who beat up gay people everywhere. Just let us know, and we will become vigilantes. Well, we will at least call the cops and recommend a lawyer to sue the guys for battery. We liked Kurt’s outfit. His dad and Blaine were spoilsports on that one. It was gay Braveheart and it was awesome.

Oh, also, we forgive Karofsky. His genuine, tear-filled apology to Kurt got to us. We can’t wait for him to come out of the closet, love himself, and do a Lady Gaga number with the rest of the gang. Jesse and Finn got into a fight over Rachel and were kicked out of prom. Quinn slapped Rachel and Rachel simply appreciated the drama of it. Didn’t Quinn look great by the way? That was nice of Rachel to just let it go, but wouldn’t it have been MORE drama for her to run more drama? And after they made it look like there were going to be consequences in the promo…poo.

Decent prom episode though. With more good songs, it would have been great.

Episode Grade: B

Gossip Girl Season Four Finale Review

You call THAT a finale?

Boring season. Boring plots. Next to no tension. The last character we care about (Blair) cheated on her man AGAIN. Chuck and Blair are such pervs. They did it at some stranger’s Bar Mitzvah. There was a time when we would have forgiven her because it was Chuck, but now we don’t even care about Chuck and Blair being together anymore. The show is right: He did bring out the darkness and depression in her. And then he had to go and get violent near her, on a window. Was he aiming for her? We’ve watched that several times and we aren’t sure. But we are officially over that couple.

And that’s bad, because that couple is what carried the show through many a rough, Vanessa-filled time. The relationship between Blair and her prince is bland and unbelievable. That was an opportunity for the show to give Blair a beau we could really root for. Put her in a triangle where we feel for both guys! And what happened to Dan/Blair? We loved that a lot more than anything else this season. In fact, the Dan and Blair romance was the highlight of season four.

The finale tried to pull out all the stops for the finale. Russell threatened Blair’s life! And then that fizzled. Georgina showed up! And she was boring. Looking good though. Raina is going back to Chicago and Russell is going to jail. Well, they were a complete waste of time. Serena had to talk her fake cousin off of a ledge. Meh. Chuck and Nate are single, so they decided to travel around the world during the summer. Either Blair or Serena is preggers. It’s probably Blair since she slept with Chuck. That’s gonna ruin her wedding to the prince. Watching Blair and Chuck try to raise a child together might be entertaining…. Serena got what looks like the beginning of a career in making movies out of books. Nice. Our dream career.

One thing we DID like was Vanessa finding Dan’s manuscript tell-all about the Upper East Side, getting it anonymously published, and then taking off to Spain. Vanessa is gone!!! Gone Gone Gone. Because this show can’t write a lame character so that she’s interesting enough to save. The actress is appealing. Why can’t the show write a woman that other women can relate to? Why are all the show’s “good” characters so boring? The bad ones are getting boring too.

Also, we know that everyone hated Jenny. We hated Jenny. But the seasons where Jenny was on the show and the episodes where she came back were the best of the show’s history. We think the show needs her. We love to hate her. We NEED to hate her. We don’t care if Taylor Momsen is a brat on set, dumping her as a series regular was a mistake.

After the finales of years’ past, we were expecting some action. Even the season three finale had us on the edge of our seats! The season four finale didn’t end with a bang, but it set up a lot of interesting-looking plots for next year (like fake cousin Charlie/Ivy and Georgina conspiring). Too bad we probably won’t be watching. Plus, this show has proven that it knows how to dangle good plots in front of our eyes, get us interested, and then completely fail to deliver and come through on its promise to make things exciting. The show is not the emotional, fast-paced, addictive fun it used to be. It’s Boring with a capital B. We aren’t emotionally invested in a single character or couple anymore. They could all die in a fiery mess and we wouldn’t care.

Episode Grade: B
Season Grade: D+

How I Met Your Mother Season Finale Review

We are not sure that we like the idea of Barney marrying anyone, let alone Nora. She’s pretty cool and all, but we liked Barney and Robin. We KNOW that fizzled and we KNOW they seemed to wrap up their romance in this finale. But we still love them as a couple and we don’t want to believe it. If Barney gets married, that might take all the zing out of his character. We like growth and everything, but we would hate to see what happened to Jim and Pam on The Office happen to Barney too. He is a suit-wearing ladies man. Don’t change that, show! But if Barney has to get married, it had better be Robin.

Zoey is gone, and we don’t think any viewer who isn’t a huge House or Jennifer Morrison fan is upset about that. We thought that crack about Zoey having new drug-dealing roommates was funny. DUH she wanted to get back to Ted. Except for the occasional sandwich, Ted is drug-free.

As for the “this is the Mother, just kidding” fake-out, we are not amused. It is about time we met the mother. Also, that would have been such a cute way to meet her. Ern got really excited that it was her and was so mad when it wasn’t the Mother. Ern was also shocked when Lily was pregnant. As you can see, Ern is really gullible when it comes to TV, so much so that if Ern guesses something ahead of time, it’s way too obvious to the point of being bad TV.

Anyway, Lily being pregnant at the end was adorable and that ending was so sweet. It was a good way to find out too. Leave it to this show to announce big things with jokes about vomit and poop. But seriously, stop eating at that restaurant, Ericksons. Morons. We hope Marshall gets the job, but he’d deserve to not get it for eating that soup. Sidenote: We love jalepeno poppers too, Marshall.

Pretty funny. At least things happened.

Finale Grade: B-
Season Grade: B-

All the Cancelled Shows So Far

We are mostly pleased with the cancellations.

http://tv.yahoo.com/slideshow/715/photos/1

Bridesmaids - Don't Go In Expecting The Hangover. It's Different

Bridesmaids is getting rave reviews and being called “a female version of The Hangover.” We want to correct this assertion, at least a little bit, so that blog readers won’t be disappointed at the theater. Sometimes having different expectations of a movie can ruin an otherwise enjoyable movie. Guys, don’t expect to go into Bridesmaids and see the wolf pack. With the way it's being advertised and the critics' blurbs, you might go in expecting the laugh-fest of your life. What you get is a good movie about friends that’s occasionally really funny. It's not fair to compare it to The Hangover, because it's trying to do something different here. It's trying to be a genuine, funny chick flick that actual women can relate to.

The most important point. 1) Bridesmaids is funny, but it also has relationship stuff, friendship stuff, life stuff, depressing stuff, awkward stuff, and serious moments. Like most Judd Apatow comedies, Bridesmaids sometimes hits the snooze on the comedy in order to inject heart and maturity. We like this sometimes, but that’s definitely a difference from The Hangover. It’s like if The Hangover and a chick flick had a baby. But that baby didn’t exactly make it to Vegas. That’s right. Don’t go in expecting a Vegas vacation movie. Ninety percent of the action takes place in the bride’s hometown of Milwaukee.

2) The sex scene at the beginning is reminiscent of something you would see on Sex and the City: Explicit and absolutely hilarious. There’s a pretty funny gross-out scene too. But this early sex scene makes you think you are going to see a movie like that the entire time. You're not. It calms down. It chills out. Some people won't like that.

3) It’s long and sometimes it feels long. Remember Funny People? Partly funny, but mostly long and grown-up? Bridesmaids is funnier than that movie, but it’s a movie like that.

4) Do you hate awkward humor where you just feel really bad for the people being embarrassed? Then a few scenes will be hellish for you, like they were for Leeard.

5) Lots of people thought the overweight, weird woman who farts or burps in the trailer would be overused and annoying. This is not the case. While not as funny or memorable as The Hangover’s Alan, she is really funny. And only used a little. We could have stood two more scenes with her, easily. We didn’t think Gilmore Girls’ Sookie could be that wonderfully weird and gross, but we were proven wrong.

6) Kristen Wiig is really good in it. And girls who aren’t, shall we say, the typical sorority girl will relate to her.

We recommend this movie, but only after you read these caveats so you don’t go in expecting an immature, raucous, shocking good time with no slow, serious parts.

Movie Grade: A-

The Vampire Diaries Season Two Finale

Photo credit biddi2.

Ern was not blown away by the season one finale like just about everyone else. They killed off the people it was convenient to kill off, plus Anna, even though she had a huge fan following and she was a great character. The cliffhanger was pretty cool, but the build-up to it was all action and few memorable moments. Leeard respectfully disagrees and thinks the season one finale is one of the best hours ever on the CW. But we're not here to talk about last year. We both agree - this season finale had it all. Closure, set-up for next season, and the coolest cliffhanger we never could have predicted. This show is making mincemeat out of oversexed True Blood AND Amish Twilight, and it doesn’t even have to try as hard as either of those things. We will recap in paragraphs and give you our reactions regarding those events by copy/pasting chat portions out of our aim logs.

Right into the discussion then: Damon got bit by Tyler, a werewolf, so he’s dying. He tried to get Elena’s forgiveness for last week’s events, but she (rightfully) pretty much told him to go pound sand. The show plays a beautiful song with lots of piano while he tries to kill himself by standing in a window, sans magic ring. There’s no reason to suffer, right? But Stefan ruined that plan by tackling him and locking him into that room they always lock each other in at the Salvatore mansion. Bonnie found out from Emily Bennett that the cure for a werewolf bite is the blood of Klaus. Stefan told Elena that Damon was bitten. She looked mildly concerned.

Leeard (8:01:53 PM): <3 Damon
ern (8:02:18 PM): He. Is. Wonderful.
Leeard (8:02:27 PM): Mmmmmmmmmmhmm. As is every other guy on this show. Basically. I still can’t believe that last week wasn’t the season finale. I mean, I’m GLAD it wasn’t, but last week was crazy. WTF Damon?
ern (8:04:13 PM): He didn't want to suffer
Leeard (8:04:27 PM): Um, that would still be suffering. Well, hellooooooo Klaus
ern (8:05:00 PM): Your TV is like five seconds ahead of mine
Leeard (8:05:05 PM): Good
ern (8:05:33 PM): Klaus has my pet peeve in actors :-(
Leeard (8:05:43 PM): Looking sexy?
ern (8:05:51 PM): Obviously not. My pet peeve is whispering in a normal conversation. I don’t mind when Damon does it much. It fits him.
Leeard (8:06:00 PM): Um everyone on this show does that. I’ve actually heard Paul Wesley talk about that in an interview with Ryan Seacrest
ern (8:06:38 PM): Nina Dobrev doesn’t do it. What did Paul say about it? GONE WITH THE WIND
Leeard (8:07:50 PM): http://ryanseacrest.com/2011/05/09/you-will-see-more-bad-stefan-says-vampire-diaries-star-paul-wesley-audio/ If you had told me a year ago that Caroline would be one of my favorite characters, I would've had you committed
ern (8:08:09 PM): She is quite possibly my number one fave.
Leeard (8:08:18 PM): I honestly think that's in my top 5 for things that have happened on this show (changing Caroline)
ern (8:08:27 PM): I'm starting to like Bonnie again. Not like her. But not hate her
Leeard (8:08:34 PM): Finally
ern (8:08:50 PM): Her willingness to try to kill Klaus to save Elena is admirable, as is her taste in hotties (Jeremy). Elena is NOT upset enough that Damon is dying.
ern (8:14:56 PM): Elena is NOT upset enough
Leeard (8:15:25 PM): I agree

The town event in the background of this is a big excuse to get people in hoop skirts, reminding a delusional Damon of when he used to live in the hoop skirt days. It was a Gone with the Wind event, and they were playing the movie on a big screen outside. While everyone was distracted by this event, Sheriff Momma took the opportunity to stop by the Salvatore house to try to get rid of Damon. This is how he escapes. While the movie was playing, Damon wandered the town, hallucinating both Elena and Katherine. Elena goes looking for him, finds him, and helps him. He bites her neck, thinking she’s Katherine, but then he comes to his senses. He goes to the Grill. Sheriff Momma finds him at the Grill and tries to shoot him, but she hits Jeremy. Caroline and Bonnie rush in and Caroline tries to feed him her blood to save him. It’s too late. He’s really dead.

Leeard (8:33:06 PM): IHRGFOIHAEHG'FIFIOEHJG JGIKJ FG JRNBG
ern (8:33:23 PM): I just stopped breathing
Leeard (8:33:32 PM): I SCARED MY MOM. What the ****? JEREMY. YOU CAN’T DIE. NO. NO. NO. NO.. I seriously screamed, and my mom came out from her room to see if something was wrong.
ern (8:34:12 PM): nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Leeard (8:34:19 PM): He HAS to be fine
ern (8:34:33 PM): I screamed too, but no one cares if something's wrong with me, so it got no reaction. I think he’s dead.
Leeard (8:35:09 PM): No, he can’t be dead. I refuse to believe it.
ern (8:35:54 PM): He just got hot this season too!
Leeard (8:36:04 PM): I disagree with THAT. He got HOT at the beginning of this season, but he's always been good looking. I refuse to accept his death.
ern (8:37:30 PM): I’ve accepted it. He looked really dead, and vamp blood couldn’t bring him back.

Klaus killed Elijah with that special dagger, keeping his promise to unite Elijah with their family. Stefan makes a deal with Klaus to save Damon. Klaus offered a vial of his blood for Damon in exchange for Stefan becoming his new right-hand man. Of course, he had to evil Stefan up a bit first. The way to do that, as we know, is to get him on human blood. Klaus fed Stefan many bags of blood presumably stolen from the blood bank, and the mighty vampire who could kill whole villages without blinking emerged. Katherine broke this news to Elena, saying that this means that Stefan sacrificed his goodness and his relationship with Elena to save Damon, thus choosing Damon over her. Near the end of the episode, we see Stefan chow down on an innocent woman offered by Klaus. Katherine brought the bottle of Klaus’s blood to Damon and caught him cuddling with Elena in bed. Because Damon was dying and confessing his love to here, Elena had given him a kiss. Damon was cured, and Katherine left with these parting words to Elena: “It’s ok to love them both. I did.”

ern (8:18:06 PM): Noooooo. I liked Elijah.
Leeard (8:17:39 PM): GASP. Me too. I thought a vampire couldn't stake an original with a dagger?
ern (8:18:31 PM): But he's part were
Leeard (8:18:40 PM): But he's also part vamp. I mean, he's also an Original, and there seem to be a ****ton of special rules for Originals. But still.
Leeard (8:39:40 PM): mmhmm. Stefan!
ern (8:40:16 PM): Bad boy Stefan? yessss
Leeard (8:40:34 PM): awwwwww stefan! Poor thing. No, Stefan! Actually, yes Stefan. Because then Damon and Elena can be together. I can’t wait until they pull the dagger out of Elijah and he kills the hell out of Klaus.
ern (8:54:01 PM): “I like you just the way you are.” This show is so lame and yet so awesome.
Leeard (8:54:14 PM): And I'm crying again. KISS HIM. YESSSSSSSSSSS
ern (8:55:00 PM): I screamed
Leeard (8:55:04 PM): I didn't. I knew it was coming.
ern (8:55:29 PM): Katherine you wonderful b****.
Leeard (8:55:32 PM): Aw, yay Katherine. She brought him the blood.

Bonnie channeled the witches to save Jeremy, crying out to them. The witches warned that there would be consequences if they gave her the power to bring him back. Bonnie didn’t care and the show had its very first un-undead resurrection. Caroline let her mom know that Jeremy was alive, that she was still Sheriff Momma’s little girl, and then she and her mom hugged. Leeard cried. At night, sitting on his bed, Jeremy thought he saw something. He got up and wandered around the house and was followed by….Vicki. And then he saw Anna. Consequences.

Leeard (8:37:34 PM): This commercial break needs to die. Someone better kill Sheriff Momma if she killed him. He can’t be permanently dead. Man, I love Elena. Girl does NOT stay sitting down.
ern (8:39:33 PM): She's too awesome to only be 17.
Leeard (8:41:38 PM): They have to save him
ern (8:41:57 PM): Yeah, or they wouldn't be dragging it on like this. You were right, he’s coming back.
Leeard (8:42:00 PM): Power through it, Bonnie!!! I love Alaric. “He’s just a kid, tell them to shut up.” Come on old witches!
ern (8:42:40 PM): Bonnie is getting a nosebleed. YES SHOW, kill Bonnie and not Jeremy
Leeard (8:42:48 PM): I’d be okay with that. Elena can’t lose everyone in her family.
ern (8:43:07 PM): Ok, I love Bonnie now. This is really sweet.
Leeard (8:43:15 PM): YES. Thank goodness
ern (8:43:35 PM): Your instantaneous reactions are ruining my life. My TV is FIVE SECONDS BEHIND.
Leeard (8:43:44 PM): Then don't look at it
ern (8:43:54 PM): I can’t not look
Leeard (8:44:02 PM): Wipe your nose, Bonnie.
ern (8:44:06 PM): There has to be a death. This is a TVD finale.
Leeard (8:44:14 PM): There were FOUR last week. And Elijah died. If there is one, it had better be the sheriff or Mama Lockwood or both.
ern (8:44:23 PM): I don't accept that. It needs to be someone we will grieve. I need an ending that shocks me.
Leeard (8:44:33 PM): Maybe Katherine.
Leeard (8:59:17 PM): !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!
ern (8:59:54 PM): A+
Leeard (8:59:55 PM): UM NO. A++++++++++++++++++

Charlie Sheen Replaced by Ashton Kutcher on Two and a Half Men

Poor Ashton Kutcher.

There we go.....That's better

Lady Gaga released her third single from her next album, which is coming up May 23rd. It's better than "Born This Way" and "Judas". It's the first single that's not a Madonna rip-off or a shameless cry for attention. But does the first party of the chorus remind anyone else of Kelly Clarkson's "My Life Would Suck Without You"?

Gaga said the song is about your last moment of life and that she was inspired to write it after her grandfather died. Funny, we just thought it was a love song. But it's just dramatic enough of a theme to be a Lady Gaga thing. She and her lover are going to take themselves to "the edge" together. That's healthy.

Still, we kind of like the song so far. Cool saxophone solo. We're sure the radio will edit that down/it won't make the remix.

Fringe Finale: The Day We Died recap, thoughts on the show as a whole, and ways it could be improved

Fringe ended its third and best season this week with a finale that will completely change everything. This season has been great, because it finally picked up the pacing. We love the high-concept elements of this show, but the creators could make it a little easier for most people to follow. Next season, we want some interesting side characters other than the main three, quicker pacing, some heart, a sense of urgency (the writers need to watch some 24 for the perfect example of how to do that with cold characters the viewers care little about), and more creepiness. This show has the convoluted plots just right. It needs to get us viscerally and emotionally more. It comes off as cold and a little slow.

It's rare for a show in this genre to completely swear off supernatural or spiritual elements. These things add an eeriness. Possibilities such as uncontrollable events, higher powers, prophecies, bone-chilling evil, and incredible displays of love open up when you add these elements. Unlike LOST, The X-Files, and Alias (successful shows of this type that achieved cult followings and levels of addictiveness to which Fringe aspires), Fringe is purely scientific in its world view. All of the weirdness can be explained by science. While it's cool and unique to see that, and it allows some original concepts to play out, it's less interesting to the viewer. LOST and Alias MIXED mind-bending science with unsettling philosophy and spirituality. Fringe needs to inject some of that into its formula to become less mechanical.

You may think that it's too late to deepen and warm Fringe with spiritual concepts, because the world of science has been so firmly established. But we disagree. Take a look at The Matrix trilogy, a flawed but special series of films that fumbled the ball with its ending. Plot-wise, The Matrix was completely technologically and scientifically driven. But much of it was a spiritual allegory and it propounded religious and philosophical teachings within its scientific world. Fringe could introduce something like that into its narrative, deepening a layer of existential investigation, asking questions, commenting, and paralleling spiritual matters. Fringe needs to pretend to be about science but really be about spiritual matters. It would have to be less heavy-handed than it was in final two Matrix films, and it would have to be more emotional as well. But, done right, this could make the show relevant to actual people. This should get rid of the emotional coldness, because spirituality contains a huge emotional component. The other way to do this is to really make us love the characters and create connections between them and depth that is undeniable. But this is more difficult.

Onto what happened in the finale....

The episode started with Peter in 2026. Was Peter REALLY supposed to pass for his late 40s in this episode? It’s hard to hide that fat baby face on Peter, even with ridiculous spiked up hair. But we went with it. Olivia simply need a matronly haircut. Bleck. Peter had been taken to the hospital after suffering an injury. He’s also an agent of Fringe Division, like Olivia, Astrid, and Olivia’s grown niece, Ella. Dang, this show sure knows how to give its leads popular but still unique names. Peter is married to Olivia, and Olivia has Broyles’ old job: head of Fringe Division. Olivia also has full use of her telekinesis. Sweet. Peter wants a child, but Olivia doesn’t think it’s a good idea to bring one into the futureless world. We were Team Peter on this.

In the future, our universe is tearing quickly because of the successful destruction of the other universe that was closely linked with ours, and there is a terrorist named Moreau causing mayhem. We need to keep our eye on the French, it seems … Moreau blew up an opera house in the beginning of the episode. Some people have no respect for classical music. He is in the Walternate-led terrorist group “End of Days,” an organization that is helping our universe’s inevitable destruction along. The plan this episode? To put a wormhole in Central Park.

Walter is in prison, facing the consequences for starting this whole mess anyway. Using his connection to Senator Broyles (nice promotion), Peter gets him out and back to his lab for the purpose of stopping the mayhem. Peter gets close enough to Walternate to confront him and ask for the mercy that Walternate’s own world was denied. Walternate shoots Olivia in the forehead. So we guess that’s a no? They totally ripped that Olivia funeral off of First Knight and LOST. We consider it a bad thing that we weren’t sad when Olivia died. Maybe we knew it wasn’t permanent or even real, but when a major character gets shot in the head, we should feel something, right?

We found out that Walter was the one who sent the machine back through time (via some people who took it back for him), a choice he could not change. We found out that Walter pulled Peter from 2011 into his future body, so that when Peter’s 2011 consciousness returns to the moment he hops in the machine, he will make a different choice. Peter disappeared at the end of Walter’s explanation. Peter went back and used the machine to create a bridge between the two worlds, bringing the doubles face-to-face with each other.

There is a hole in both universes in the rooms that hold the machines where the people from the two universes can come together to fix things. Peter explained this to his fathers and disappeared mid-speech. No one noticed his disappearance. Cut to the observers, who say, “They don’t remember Peter. How could they? He never existed. He served his purpose.” Head spinning? If you are missing how this happened, don’t worry. The show has yet to spell it out for us. But theories abound. One theory says that Peter is the one who took the machine back in time, and he will come back or be found later.

Good ending. Episode Grade: B+. Season Grade: B+

Reasons We're Not Sad Summer is Coming Up

Breaking Bad, Happy Endings, Breaking In, Love Bites, Switched at Birth, Covert Affairs, Rookie Blue, The Lying Game, So You Think You Can Dance, Suits, Weeds, The Big C, The United States of Tara, South Park, Teen Wolf, True Blood, Dr. Who, The Nine Lives of Chloe King, Wilfred, Alfas, Haven, A Game of Thrones, Pretty Little Liars, White Collar, The Glee Project, Outcasts, 51, and Psych.

Also, we will have time to catch up on/get into The Chicago Code, The Good Wife, Justified, Sons of Anarchy, Mad Men, Nikita, Castle, Parenthood, The Middle, 30 Rock, Breakout Kings, and Supernatural.